How Meditation and Presence Transform Your Life

Hey,

This is Ish,

And in today's talk,

I'll be going over how presence and meditation can transform your daily life.

And I've been inspired to make this talk after recently increasing the amount of time I meditate per day.

So normally I try to do about two to three hours,

But because I'm in between jobs at the moment,

I've been increasing it to about five hours a day.

And I've observed how the power of meditation can really impact your life in a very positive way and how presence can change your day-to-day life or the experience of it at least.

And what I did differently this time is that normally when I increase the amount that I meditate,

I go to formal retreats in Zen centers or various Buddhist type monasteries where you take strict vows of silence,

You're in complete solitude,

And you don't really engage with the world.

What I did a bit differently this time is that I still went about my daily life.

So going out,

Meeting friends,

Engaging with the world,

Making these talks.

But it was just a bit more reflective version of that.

So I'll be sharing with you two benefits of how meditation and presence work can really impact your life,

And then one challenge that you may experience as you start to go deeper in your practice.

So the first thing is that meditation makes the ordinary extraordinary.

Now that's something you may have heard before,

And you may be wondering why.

Why does this happen?

So this happens because of the power of your concentration,

Which has increased,

And also because you are relying less on the senses to give you pleasure,

But rather looking inwards and finding pleasure from within.

And when you start to do this,

You naturally start to withdraw your attention away from the outside world.

And like a cocoon or a turtle withdrawing its limbs,

You start to look inwards for peace.

And when you do this,

The whole system of your being starts to slow down a bit more.

And you start to notice details in your environment all around you that you may have missed before.

Again,

This comes from the concentration aspect of your practice.

So what that means is that you will naturally begin to enjoy things in your life in a subtler way that you may not have seen before.

So there are certain things in your environment that you may have overlooked,

But now you start to observe things with greater detail.

It is almost as if you had poor vision before,

And then all of a sudden you get glasses or contacts,

In my case.

And all of a sudden you're surprised because you can see the whole world more vividly.

It's almost like upgrading from a standard definition quality when you're watching TV to a 4K resolution.

So everything just seems more detailed,

Brighter,

More vivid in your experience when you go about and interact in the world.

And I think this deeper appreciation for aesthetics really starts to stand out because when you look at common places where people go out and meditate and really deepen their practice,

It's out in a mountain or a village or out in nature,

Surrounded by trees,

Or a very scenic place.

And the reason why people tend to go to these places is because they start to appreciate the beauty in little things a bit more.

So people notice a bird flying by and they're just like,

Wow,

This is amazing.

Even though in our modern city life,

We may have totally ignored a bird flying by.

But because you meditate more and you start to deepen your practice,

You will observe these things that you may have missed otherwise.

Now some practical things I've noticed is that I'll start to enjoy drinking tea more often,

Something I do daily.

But what I noticed specifically is that as I increase the hours that I meditate,

I can really slow down and taste the earthy flavors of Chinese pu'er tea that I'm drinking right now as we speak,

As opposed to gulping it down.

Or for example,

If I'm on a date with a woman,

I'll really enjoy subtler things like the softness in her voice or the glitter that she put on her cheeks for the date,

The way she did her makeup.

And these are all things that I may have just completely looked over before,

Because I'd be trapped in my head or thinking about what I was going to say next.

So this quality of presence allows you to really enjoy everything,

All aspects of your life.

Another example is I'd be hanging out with my cat,

Dharma,

And we'd just be sitting in the bed and I'd observe him just purring.

And in that moment,

I just felt completely contented from within and satisfied.

I really didn't need anything.

Even though I wasn't doing as much in the world,

I was just happy with a lot less.

So this points me to the first realization is that what meditation and presence work in general really helps you discover is that you don't need as much in the world to satisfy you.

And you can actually learn to be contented from within.

In fact,

Contentment is one of the great spiritual qualities talked about in Buddhism and Taoism,

For example.

Because if you really learn to train yourself in meditation to be happy just staring at a wall or closing your eyes,

The sky's the limit as far as your happiness,

Because you need less and less.

And because you don't have to meet a certain criteria to be happy,

And you start to realize this actually through your practice,

This will change your orientation in the world from seeking pleasures from outside and really chasing after sense pleasures to being contented from within.

And of course,

You can still enjoy things in the world.

That doesn't change.

And I think if you're definitely more extroverted,

You'll enjoy it also.

You'll tend to seek that out more.

But you don't need it as much.

Now the next thing you'll observe in your practice is a feeling of being at ease in the world.

So it is a feeling that everything is okay.

And this actually comes from developing the quality of equanimity in your meditation practice.

So equanimity is talked about definitely a lot in Buddhism.

It's emphasized quite a bit.

It is also one of the factors of enlightenment and awakening.

So what you'll notice is that life is oftentimes like a mirror.

So the energy that you put out will tend to be what you get back.

And this is sometimes talked about in New Age circles,

Like the law of attraction,

For example.

But the practical reason why this works is that when you are feeling calm,

Relaxed,

And happy for no reason,

And if you also practice loving kindness meditations,

For example,

The Brahma Viharas,

And you see everyone as your friend,

All of a sudden the world starts to become friendlier to you.

And of course the world hasn't changed,

But you have changed yourself.

So it's a transformation from within that spills over and has a ripple effect to everyone all around you.

So it radiates,

And other people will mirror that back.

Because when you're happy and calm,

Other people will look forward to being next to you.

Compared to when you're negative and reactive,

Which I'll talk about in a second.

Because most of my life I can definitely say I've walked around completely reactive,

Angry at the world,

Angry at myself,

Impatient,

Irritable at everyone.

I can definitely say I was more of an aversive personality type.

I definitely don't have that natural peace and love vibe,

You know,

That hippie vibe.

I definitely don't have that,

Or at least I didn't.

But I started to experience that a little bit more through the practice itself.

And when you start to just open up and soften,

And you're just more receptive and happy in the world,

You also become an anchor in a storm,

And also water in the desert for other people.

So you become actually a safe refuge for other people.

So how interesting is that,

Is that your practice that you're doing,

That you're sitting for hours a day,

Has an immediate impact on other people because you all of a sudden feel safe to others.

You know,

I hear when I first started to meditate in the various Zen centers I go to,

A lot of the monks will say,

Thank you for your practice.

Or the older monks will say,

Your presence alone has an effect on other people.

And I just be thinking,

What does that even mean?

My presence has an impact on people?

Me staring at a wall affects other people?

What does that mean?

But now I start to see that because,

You know,

The more I meditate,

It actually helps others through non-doing.

So it's actually a passive effect of your meditation practice,

Where you start to do less because you're comfortable in silence,

You don't need to do as much,

You're just being and resting in the moment.

And funny enough,

That resting in the moment itself has a ripple effect to other people and influences the world in a positive way,

Something you may not have even realized.

Now going over the last observation I've noticed in this period is that there can also be an adjustment or challenge.

And this is because as you begin to slow down,

Become more reflective and meditative,

There starts to become a deeper divide or contrast between a modern fast-paced world all around you,

Especially if you live in a big city like I do.

Because in a big city,

People are just moving in a fast-paced fashion.

And I think you don't necessarily have to be in a big city to experience this because with the rise of social media,

The internet,

People texting all the time,

The world starts to move a little bit faster,

And there's more potentials for distraction,

Complexity,

And busyness,

Which is the opposite of these qualities we learn to cultivate on our meditation cushion.

And you'll practically observe this when you go out,

You'll notice that people can't stand silence in a conversation,

They will rush to fill any kind of silence,

And they almost feel very anxious,

They gotta say something,

They can't just sit and be.

You'll also notice people check social media just randomly,

And it's actually an unconscious habit at times.

I've noticed people in elevators just pull out their phone,

Scroll their phone up and down and just put their phone back in their pocket,

Not actually checking anything or being intentional.

And you can also see this in certain work cultures that promote output and being efficient all the time.

And there may also be a shift in your values too,

Because you will start to value different things,

Different qualities that you learn on your meditation cushion and the spiritual life.

These qualities can also stand in contrast with the busy world all around you.

So in the world,

It tends to prioritize a sense of doer energy,

So you want to constantly be doing things.

And I think there's a time and place for doing energy,

Because if you're coming from a lot of unconscious behavior,

For example,

You do need to take a lot of action to break out of stagnation and choose positive habits,

Which will then create a momentum where you can create the life that you want and create this positive foundation in which you can rest your spiritual practice.

And I've talked about this in different talks,

Which you can check out.

But gradually,

As you build a positive foundation,

You then start to shift from constantly doing things to then actually just being and being okay with a lot less,

Being happy with little,

And not always doing,

But just resting in the moment as it is.

And there's a certain simplicity to that.

So again,

This is a contrast to our modern world.

Now,

This contrast that you experience on your journey can be challenging,

Because the way that you're starting to operate now in the world has a certain separation from the way you used to live.

So you may start to now reflect on your life and see what you may want to do.

You may have a career change or align with different friend groups.

So there can be a lot of changes and upheaval,

And there can be a lot of chaos with that.

So that's something to also keep in mind on your journey.

So in that case,

I would actually take some time to talk to a trusted teacher,

To look for more guidance,

To take a step back and start to ponder things.

Don't make any drastic changes in the moment that you'll later regret.

Like,

Don't just quit your job and go out to the mountains.

I mean,

You could do that if that's your path,

But you don't want to generally make any decisions out of haste.

And just take a step back and reflect on things and just start to see where your life will be headed.

And this is not something you can actually control,

But something that will be given to you.

So you learn to trust the bigger calling for your life and a bigger unfolding of your life.

This is not something you can force,

But something that will be revealed to you in very small steps.

And these small steps,

You just take that,

And the path will naturally unfold as you begin to walk it.

So this is a bit more intuitive way to start to navigate in the world,

A more present way,

A spontaneous way.

And you learn to trust your own intuition and judgment as you begin to rely less on analytical mind that was always trying to think ahead and plan for every single outcome.

And you learn to just trust and let go a bit more.

And this is something that will happen over time as you meditate more.

So anyways,

Hope you found this talk helpful.

Let me know in the comments what you've personally observed as a result of your meditation practice.

How has it changed your life?

I'd be curious to hear.

Thank you for listening.