Befriending ADHD

On Day 1 we set the scene and identify the elephant in the room, that ADHDers have a hard time meditating. We explore what meditation ‘really’ is and in so doing, set you up for success. Fidgeting. Losing focus. Stretching. Lying down. It’s all welcome here. In our guided practice, we reflect upon all the ‘stories’ we hold or have been told about ADHD and who we are. Together, we create some space so that we feel less pulled in by these negative narratives.

On Day 2 we do a deep dive into the nervous system, the window of tolerance, hyper and hypo arousal. We acknowledge the truth that ADHDers have a smaller window of tolerance and can really benefit from becoming familiar with some tools to bring themselves back into regulation. In our practice together, we explore a practice that is scientifically proven to bring us out of dysregulation back into our window of tolerance.

On Day 3 we continue to explore ADHD through the lens of the nervous system. We acknowledge that doing this takes away the judgement, shame and guilt, and instead, places the focus more objectively on the brain and our neuro-wiring. We explore the prefrontal cortex and executive functioning. In our guided meditation together, we experiment with an ancient practice that helps to bring the prefrontal cortex back on line.

On Day 4 we reflect upon how many of us ADHDers have busy brains. We explore the concept of synapse pruning and how we may have a slower pruning process than neurotypicals. This can feel like every time we want to get somewhere (in our brain or our lives) we have to choose between hundreds of little side streets rather than one nice well marked highway. In our meditation together, we will create some space and balance within our body and mind so that we can have a rest from all the meandering down side streets.

On Day 5 we reflect upon how the goal isn’t to be regulated all the time, nor will being regulated make our ADHD qualities totally disappear. We are looking for curiosity, acceptance and empowered action rather than a cure! Today’s practice is an invitation for you to deepen your awareness of what happens when you spend long periods of time in the ‘too hot state’ and how you can become more proactive to mitigate these circumstances.

On Day 6 we shift our attention to the hypo arousal state, also known as the ‘too cool’ state. For you this might look like laying on the couch scrolling, binging netflix and eating ice cream from the tub instead of getting up and going to the gym or spending time with your friends. Maybe you don't reply to your friend’s texts or pick up the phone when your mum or sister calls. Today’s practice is a trauma informed, nervous system practice designed to bring you out of hypo arousal. So if it’s ok with you, it’s best done sitting in a chair.

On Day 7 we explore dopamine, and how individuals with ADHD may have an imbalance or dysregulation of dopamine levels in specific areas of the brain. We also normalise (and drop the shame) relating to chasing a dopamine hit in unhealthy ways, through social media, junk food, streaming, online shopping or relationship drama. In our practice together, you’ll explore a science backed, healthy way to increase your happy hormones and regulate your nervous system.

On Day 8 we turn our attention to the emotional aspects of ADHD. We acknowledge that for us ADHDers, we can be flooded with joy, excitement, anger, fear, guilt or shame all in the span of a few hours. It can be exhausting, confusing and dysregulating. In our practice together, we cool down our emotions and our heightened sensitivity to rejection, criticism or judgement so that we can move through the world feeling more balanced and confident.

On Day 9 we continue to explore heightened emotions as part of the ADHD experience. When big or sudden emotions come over us, we can act impulsively, say things we later regret, feel thrown about or like we are on an emotional roller coaster. And so what many of us do to avoid feeling these things, and this level of inner chaos or instability, is we push our emotions down. In our practice together, we use the framework RAIN to hold space for our challenges and emotional experiences.

On Day 10 we explore another key element of befriending our nervous system - developing an understanding of our sensory profile. I like to think of it as like a dating profile, spelling out our likes and dislikes, but in relation to our senses. In our practice together, we explore our senses and what gives us pleasure, what makes us stressed and what helps to regulate us.

On Day 11 we dive deep into motivation and meaning. Specifically, that neurotypicals have an importance based nervous system that prioritizes tasks based on responsibility, rewards, consequences and external pressures. Neurodivergent people in contrast, have an interest based nervous system that gets motivated through personal engagement and curiosity. Today’s meditation is an opportunity for you to recruit your interest based nervous system to help you feel more motivated to achieve, succeed and find meaning in a primarily neurotypical world.

On Day 12 we explore hyper fixations and special interests, the ADHDers ability to get really interested in certain things like a new sport, arts and crafts, music and so on. We also explore how when we view these interests through the lens of play, we can see how they in fact, have a regulating impact on our nervous system. In our practice together, we cast our minds back to our younger years and remember how play used to make us feel, and we dare to bring more play into our adult lives.

On Day 13 we explore the neuroscience around awe and exactly why it is such an effective tool for us ADHDers when we move into either the hyper or hypo arousal states or feel caught up in negative self narratives. In our meditation together, we reflect on past moments of awe, get clear about how we could use awe to help us up or down regulate during our regular week and explore how awe can expand our thinking and perspective.

On Day 14 we reflect upon how having a natural enthusiasm for new interests, our ability to feel playful and in flow, to focus our attention on things that spark our curiosity and our natural inclination towards nature, awe and wonder are indeed beautiful aspects of the ADHD experience. Today’s practice is an invitation to continue to frame ADHD in more strength based ways without moving into the simplistic and often dismissive narrative that ADHD is a super power.

On Day 15 we discuss how there are so many ways to measure your self worth that aren’t to do with productivity, organisational skills and sitting still for hours at a time. For example, what about the way you light up a room, your infectious laugh, the way you say yes to things so easily. What about your unique way of seeing the world, the small details you notice in nature or your willingness to carve out your own path rather than follow the pack. As we reach the end of this course I really hope that your perspective has broadened and that you feel more able to be with your entire ADHD experience. Today’s guided meditation is designed to help you explore and accept the many different parts of you.

On Day 16 we celebrate your commitment to carving out this time to learn more about ADHD, the way it shows up for you and the impact it has on your life. I share my hope that by getting to know your unique nervous system, learning some tools for regulation and by practicing curiosity and self acceptance you feel able to soften some of the inner judgement and also feel more confident and empowered to create a life that plays to your strengths. In our final practice together, we offer our younger self compassion and our future self hope.