When Something Goes Wrong, You Blame Yourself First - by Dr. Femke E. Bakker

COURSE

When Something Goes Wrong, You Blame Yourself First

With Dr. Femke E. Bakker

Something goes wrong, and before you have had time to think, a voice inside you has already decided whose fault it is. You know that voice. It is fast, it is familiar, and it usually sounds like it is telling you the truth. This is a short course about what you say to yourself when you get something wrong, and what becomes possible when that changes. Over five lessons we listen to that voice, question whether its harshness ever really helped, and practice turning toward yourself instead. You will not be asked to fight it, silence it, or fix yourself. Each lesson is around ten minutes, with a guided practice.


Meet your Teacher

Dr. Femke E. Bakker is a certified meditation teacher who has been teaching since 2018, and the creator of the selfgentleness perspective. She came to this subject through her own life rather than through theory. She grew up as the strong one in her family, learned early to put everyone else's needs before her own, and spent years believing that being hard on herself was what kept her going. Unlearning that belief has been a slow process, and it is the process this course is built from. Alongside her meditation teaching she is a political psychologist and senior assistant professor at Leiden University, where she has taught since 2010 and researches leadership, belief systems, and decision making under stress. She is not a therapist, and this course is not therapy. It is a practice, offered by someone who needed it herself first.

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5 Days

0 students

No ratings

10 min / day

Acceptance

English


Lesson 1

The Voice That Speaks First

Before you have finished noticing what went wrong, something has already spoken.: that inner critical voice. And it's not easy to not believe it. Today we do nothing except listen to it, and hear what it actually says.

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Lesson 2

Does Being Hard On Yourself Actually Help?

You keep listening to the inner harshness because it feels like it makes you better. Not so weird; we live in a world where we constantly hear the message: be tough. This lesson asks whether that is true and what it has cost you along the way.

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Lesson 3

Turning Toward Yourself Instead Against Yourself

What to do in the moment itself, when the feeling is still in your chest. How can you let the inner critic calm down without just pushing it away? A simple practice for meeting yourself rather than turning away.

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Lesson 4

When Knowing Is Not Enough

Sometimes you see the whole pattern clearly and still cannot choose yourself. It can feel as if you're failing at taking care of yourself, but it's actually not. This lesson is about that place and why being stuck there is not evidence that nothing has changed.

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Lesson 5

The Promise You Make Yourself

You did something amazing over the last four days. It might feel small, but from experience, I can tell you that you've made a small shift in the way you treat yourself. In this lesson, I guide you in a small daily practice that you can use whenever you need it. And. We make a promise that you can actually keep.

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