Welcome,
I'm Skylar Liberty Rose.
Please settle in and get comfortable where you are.
Close your eyes if you'd like to.
Take a deep breath in through your nose.
And gently exhale through your mouth.
On your next inhale,
Hold the breath for a couple of seconds before slowly releasing.
Once again,
Inhaling and holding for 3,
2,
1 and letting go.
Return to breathing naturally,
Following your own easy rhythm.
Noticing that you can trust your body to do exactly what it needs.
The journey to menopause is a deeply transitional time.
Perimenopause itself can take place over a number of years and the landscape that may have once been certain and steady can begin to shift beneath you,
Leaving you feeling off kilter.
Fear and anxiety about this change can merge together to create a perfect storm.
An anger that spills over.
A rage that erupts.
A fury desperately seeking an escape route.
The catalyst for this anger might appear to be insignificant.
The rage itself may seem disproportionate to the circumstance.
But let's look at the story beneath the story.
Because the dish left in the sink is probably not the problem.
The comment in the meeting is probably not the problem.
They are,
More likely,
The last straw on a precarious pile that you've been balancing for years.
Perhaps without support or understanding.
Hairy menopause is like a pendulum.
Our hormones are in real and rapid change.
From one day to the next,
We can experience the swing of the pendulum from one end to the other.
Barely giving us time to catch our breath before it swings in the other direction.
We're often told that anger is something to control,
Suppress,
Or move past as quickly as possible.
Especially as women.
Because anger isn't attractive and we've spent a lifetime learning how to be accommodating.
But anger is information.
It tells us when something isn't working.
When a boundary has been crossed.
When we've been carrying too much for too long.
When a need has gone unmet.
So for the next few moments rather than trying to get rid of your anger that simply makes space for it.
Notice where it lives in your body right now.
Perhaps it's a tightening in your chest.
A knot in your stomach.
A clenched jaw.
Heat in your face or tension in your shoulders.
There's nothing you need to do about it.
Just notice.
As you breathe,
See if you can become curious about this feeling,
Rather than afraid of it.
What is this anger asking for?
Not what is it angry about,
What is it asking for.
More rest.
More support.
More honesty.
More space.
More respect.
You don't need to force an answer.
Simply allow the question to settle.
Take another slow breath in.
And a long breath out.
Imagine that with each exhale you're creating a little more room around the anger.
Not pushing it away,
Not feeding it.
Just loosening your grip on it.
So often in midlife,
We're carrying decades of expectations.
Expectations about how we should look.
How we should behave.
How much we should tolerate.
How much we should give.
And sometimes rage arrives when we no longer have the energy to meet those expectations.
Consider the possibility that your anger isn't a sign that you're failing.
It may simply be a sign that something within you is changing.
That something is asking to be acknowledged.
That something is ready to be heard.
That you're entering a new chapter of your life where authenticity matters more to you than appeasing others.
Take a slow breath in.
And as you exhale,
Allow your shoulders to soften.
Take another breath in.
And as you exhale,
Unclench whatever you've been holding onto.
Even if only slightly.
You don't need to solve anything right now.
You don't need to figure out the next step.
You don't need to justify what you're feeling.
For this moment,
It's enough to be here.
Breathing.
Listening.
Allowing Notice the support beneath you.
Notice the steady rhythm of your breath.
Notice that beneath the intensity of any anger you feel.
You are still supported.
What might it feel like for you if instead of asking yourself,
Why am I so angry?
You asked instead.
What has been true for a long time that I have not been allowing myself to think,
Feel or say.
You might find that you have an immediate response to this question.
An answer that has been ready and waiting.
Or perhaps it's a little murky and unclear just now.
That's okay.
You're simply opening up the space.
Knowing you can return to this question,
This meditation anytime.
As you return to your breath.
Consider the possibility that nothing has gone wrong.
You are adapting to change.
You are learning a new rhythm.
You are allowed to outgrow old behaviours that no longer serve you.
Take a deep inhale.
And a slow releasing exhale.
And when you're ready.
Begin to bring your awareness back to the room you're in.
As you return to your day,
Remember this.
You are moving through one of the most significant transitions of your life.
And like all transitions,
It asks something of you.
May you meet yourself with patience.
May you meet yourself with understanding.
And may you trust that beneath the noise,
Beneath the fury,
Beneath the pendulum swing of it all,
There is wisdom waiting to be heard.
Sending love and solidarity from my heart to yours.
