The World Needs More Of You - Sep 14

Have you ever questioned the way you turn up in the world? In today's 5 Minutes In Nature, Liz reflects on the importance of being herself. A comment from a colleague temporarily had her question whether she should be more gregarious, but then Liz quickly realised being more outgoing would be inauthentic. She realises it's good to be yourself in the world and to shine in an authentic way.

Transcript

Hello and welcome to Five Minutes in Nature with me, Liz Scott, Up on Dartmoor in the afternoon sunshine. The hillsides here are covered in a green bracken fern. We call it bracken, It's like a fern that is quite prolific here on Dartmoor and it covers the hillsides, Smothering it in the summertime with a vibrant green. But right at the moment, These ferns, The bracken, Is starting to turn. It gets very crispy and golden orange in the autumn and winter months. And this hillside, Which is still, Well, The majority of it and is predominantly green, Is going to go a wonderful golden brown over the next few weeks. And then the hillsides are, Looks like they've been painted orange. I love the autumn and winter colour of the Dartmoor. It lights me up. It feels as though it takes on a vibrant coat, A mantle of rich colours. And today's reflection leads on from yesterday. Do you remember I was talking about the power of being seen? And I've got a friend, An American friend that I met in the island of Ireland, Who really sees me. She sees the quietness of me. She sees my creativity. She sees the way I operate in the world. She sees me and acknowledges me and recognizes me for who I am. And in the presence of somebody like that, I find I flourish. I blossom. Bloom. It's me in my best environment. But I met up with somebody else as well. So my friend from America and I met up with another lady. And this other lady and I, We're on a particular group that we are involved in looking at sharing community work across the world. Now, This other lady is a big character. She's one of these people that if she walks into the room, She takes everybody's attention. She's got an incredible charisma. She shines with energy. Talk and wax lyrical in a way that just has me dumbfounded because I'm quite quiet in company. She has this really big character. And my American friend, The lady who sees me, She described me to this lady and said, You know, Liz is brilliant in groups. You know, She's like a magician in groups. Have you ever seen Liz facilitate a group? Now I know that my friend is referring to the way that I flourish in group facilitation. If I'm leading a group, I almost feel as though I pick up the whole atmosphere of the room I feel people, I feel the energy of the room, And I move very intuitively. I allow wisdom to guide me in how I facilitate groups. She's seen that in action. It's like I'm gentle, But I'm firm. I know, I'm grounded, And I know that groups respond to that in me. So my friend said this, She said, Oh, Did you know Liz is like a magician in a group? And this other lady, Who doesn't really know me that well, She said, Well, In my experience, Liz needs to step out from my shadow in the group that we're in. That's what I would like to see, Her step out from my shadow. Now, I listened to this and felt a bit perplexed, But I'm always one to Allow something to settle to see if it's true for me or not. And what I realized as I reflected on this later is I realized that Actually, We are two very different characters this this lady with a big personality who leads this group and has got an incredible charisma and She is brilliant at being herself and being that energy in the world. Like she has that capacity to hold fort, To speak out, To find things to say when I find myself sinking back into a listening mode. But what I realize is I don't need to step outside of her shadow. I don't need to step away from her shadow. I just need to be me. Like, I am not a gregarious character, So there's no point in me trying to be more gregarious than she is. It's about me being more deeply tuned into who I am. And being firm and grounded in who I am and how I express myself in the world. I'm just curious, Do you find you are one of these gregarious people? Or are you a quieter person? Or would you describe yourself completely different? How do you turn up in the world? And do you own that? Are you that? Are you you as much as you can be in the world? Because as far as I'm concerned, The world needs to see more of you. Let me know your reflections and don't forget to join me again tomorrow for another 5 minutes in nature.

Reviews

Great reflection Liz. I feel like I naturally adapt to different situations. In my classes I tend to be more gregarious, cracking jokes and generally making it as fun as possible. I don’t feel this is an act but it does feel a little like being on stage. I think we respond to the energy of people around us and in this situation I know I am celebrated and enjoyed so it brings out my playful side.

In a group where I don’t know a lot of people I will be a bit quieter and hang back, especially if I’m with my husband who’s not as social as I am. If we are together and out exploring I tend to be more chatty with workers/servers, if we are stopping in shops and restaurants. I want to make people around me feel comfortable.

And of course with long time friends I can really let my hair down ☺️

Thanks 🙏💗

Your story today about the woman who thinks you should step out from behind her shadow reminds me of a lead singer I worked with back in the 90s for quite a few years. He wanted me to be a bigger presence on stage, a pianist more like Jerry Lee Lewis. But that’s not who I am. I also sat with it for a while, but realized I just needed to be grounded as myself. I didn’t need to be some version that was more like him. In my years of being a performer & a leader, this has come up several times. Thankfully, I feel more settled with who I am these days, and I allow my own unique light, as it is, to shine. I think you also know where you shine. It’s not a competition. It’s allowing each of us to be who and what we are, as we are; a lovely, unique expression of light!

I find groups hard. I'm naturally quiet and shy by nature and can get easily overwhelmed by loud, gregarious people. I also need time to consider the questions being asked and form my opinion before I feel confident enough to answer. I end up feeling that I never present the best of my self and that I'm best off just keeping quiet as the louder, more shouty people seem to take over. Sometimes this means I end up sacrificing my own true nature so as to not cause confrontation or look as if I'm the only one that disagrees. It helps when there's a good group facilitator as they recognise when the quieter folks are being overlooked, but unfortunately that doesn't happen very often in my experience.

Totally agree we need people to be who they truly are rather than bigger, better louder like everybody else.
I’m a quitter one in social situations or groups. I used to not like that about myself because I felt invisible. These days as I’m more comfortable and understanding my true nature, it doesn’t bother me.
As trust wisdom always guides us to shine in who we are. Thank you for sharing.