Hello and welcome to five minutes in nature with me Liz Scott.
Well it's a little bit cool,
It's in the evening and it's a grey old sky and the light now because the clocks have all changed it's much lighter in the evenings than it has been when I walk out at this time.
You can probably hear on the hillsides above me there are sheep grazing and just above me here is a gorse bush,
A thorn bush with lots of yellow flowers all over it.
It's quite a bright colour against a landscape that is mainly the green of the grass,
The dark green of the gorse bushes and then the orangey brown of the bracken that died down after last year's flourishing of summer.
And today I was speaking with a client and we were talking,
She's a leader,
And we were talking about some of the things that felt important to her and I'm going to share with you as well one of the things that came up.
We were talking about the amount of work that she had on and she's got lots of people demanding her attention and wanting a little piece of her and as we talked she said I'm really really looking forward to going to the gym with my friends this evening because I really feel like that for me is where I recharge my batteries.
And then in the next breath she said but there's somebody that's trying to get hold of me and I know if I get on the call with this particular person I'll just end up in a long conversation and that means I probably won't be able to go to the gym and so you know she suddenly got into a little bit of unsettled thinking about what she should or shouldn't do.
And it occurred to me as we were talking to share something with her that I share often with people and I share with myself as well.
It really helps me when it comes to seeing what is right for me to do particularly when there's a little bit of confusion about decisions or choices that I need to make.
And the thing I said to her is this is when you say yes to something remember you are saying no to something else.
So you need to make sure that what you are saying yes to is more important than what you're saying no to.
So in this example if she had taken this particular phone call with his colleague then she would be saying yes to that phone call and she would also need to know that she would be saying no to going to the gym and having that nourishing time with her friends.
I often see this with people who are working.
They often find themselves saying yes to work rather than yes to family time.
And when you say yes to work you've just got to realize that you're saying no to something else.
And for many people they're saying no to spending time with their children or they're saying no to being emotionally present when they're at home because they're so exhausted from work.
So remember that when you say yes you are actually saying no to something else.
So you need to make sure that your yes is more important than your no.
Often my husband looks at my diary and he will see that there appears to be a gap in the diary and he'll suggest that we do something to fill the gap.
And I have to say to him do you know what I know there's nothing in the diary but that's actually time for me.
That's time for me maybe with my writing or with my recordings.
I might not have timetabled something in my diary but that's actually space.
So I have to say no to him and it's hard because he doesn't see it.
He sees it as a space in my diary and he thinks he's filling it with something I want to do.
But I also need downtime.
I need space.
I need creative time.
That is nourishing.
So can you see that when you say yes to something you're saying no to something else.
And a lot of the time we say yes to something that feels urgent and pressurized and we say no to the very thing that will nourish us and reconnect us and have us be present around family and friends.
So let me repeat that again for you and let me know your reflections on it.
Remember that when you say yes to something you're saying no to something else.
So make sure your yes is more important than your no.
Don't forget to join me again tomorrow for another five minutes in nature.
