IFS For Busyness

This supportive IFS-based practice guides the viewer through a 3-step IFS process to Move Toward our busyness: getting to know it, the messages it carries, how it may be trying to help, and ways to help it settle. Led by a Certified IFS therapist and IFS Clinical Consultant, this meditation helps viewers develop a more productive relationship with busyness.

Transcript

Hi, Sweet friends. Welcome to Move Toward with Jenna. I'm Jenna, And today we are going to move toward busyness. Let's get started. Welcome, My sweet friends. This is Move Toward with Jenna. I'm Jenna, And today we are going to move toward our busyness. So, If you're like me, Busyness is a really common part of my life experience, And today we are going to move toward our busyness to see if we can get to know it a little bit better, Maybe help it to feel some relief in case it's working harder than it would like to be. So, Let me just invite you as we move toward, As always, Just sort of getting comfortable, Settling into your body in whatever way feels right for you. I love to close my eyes and take a couple of deep cleansing breaths, But do what feels right for you today. You can let your gaze just drop softly, Whatever you'd like, To just start to shift your attention from all the things going on out here in the world around us to our inner experience, And just taking a moment to notice what it feels like when we feel just flooded or overwhelmed with busyness. So, For me, What's coming up is I'm noticing when I feel overwhelmed with busyness, I have lots and lots of just racing thoughts. I've kind of got this check box, Do this, Do this, Do this, That starts going in my brain, And I'm noticing that my neck starts to tense, And my shoulders start to raise up, And my kind of whole body starts to angle forward with like an energy of, We got to go do this. Yeah, And I'm noticing when I get in that place of overwhelmed with busyness, My breathing gets more shallow, So I'm not breathing diaphragmatically, But I'm actually more in a shallow place in my upper chest of like it's just like I'm starting to breathe quickly, Move quickly, My pace picks up, My thoughts are going quickly, And it just feels like I got to get all these things done, And I have lots and lots of thoughts of all of the things that need to get done that just keep kind of flashing into my mind. Oh, Don't forget to do this, And don't forget to do that. So what is it like for you? Your experience may be similar to mine, Or it may be completely different, And either way is absolutely wonderful. Just notice where you start to become aware of busyness in and around your body, And once you have a sense of where busyness or overwhelm shows up for you, As we continue this step one of noticing, If there's a place in your body where you experience it, Just feel free to put your hands on that area of your body if that feels right for you today, Or breathe into it, Just doing whatever feels right for you to really welcome the busy, And if you're like me, You may notice a part of you that really does not like the busyness jumping up and saying, I don't want to welcome the busyness. Busyness runs your life so much of the time. Why don't you ever listen to me? I want to rest. I would like to avoid all those things and go eat bonbons on the beach. So that part feels like it's kind of on my left shoulder that's saying those things to me, And so you may have a similar part or a different one. Just noticing what comes up when you start to move toward your busyness, And whatever it is that you may notice that comes up alongside the busyness, Like for me the avoidant part that doesn't like the busyness, That part probably makes sense. So welcome that part. Thank that part for how it's trying to help you. I'm aware that that part of me is trying to help me rest, And it's trying to help me have balance in my life, And I'm also aware it's much weaker in my internal experience than the busy part. So it's not a part of me that I listen to quite as well as I listen to the busy, So I just want to acknowledge that. I think I'm gonna take a minute and set an intention to spend time with the avoid part of me. If that is similar for you, Spend a moment with that part. I'm just going to take a minute to set an intention to come back to the avoid part. Yeah, So my avoid part really appreciated the acknowledgement. In my situation today, It's willing to wait because I have worked with this part before, And it knows that I will come back to it, But if a part of you that doesn't like the busy is not really willing to wait, Then just switch your focus for this meditation to that part of you instead of the busy, Overwhelmed part. So then as you come into this deeper space of more of a calm, Compassionate noticing of the overwhelm, You may, As I am noticing, My shoulders are able to drop a little bit more. It feels a little more calm inside. It's not quite as amped up, But however you're experiencing your busy today, That's exactly right. So just welcome it exactly the way it is. No agenda to change it in any way. And as you are gently allowing your awareness to be present with your busyness, You may begin to sense this opening spaciousness inside of you that holds deep compassion for the part of you that's so busy and may feel very deeply curious about it and open-hearted. And if not, Feel free to pause the video for as long as you need and just spend time with any other feelings or experiences that come up for you that are preventing that open-hearted feeling. But if you do have that sense of now feeling calm and compassionate toward the busy part of you, That's an indication that we're ready to move to step two, Which is, Now that we've noticed, We want to go on to step two, Which is notify. What is it that our busyness, What is it that our overwhelm wants to notify us about? How is it trying to help us? So just ask your overwhelmed part, How are you trying to help me? And don't try to figure out the right answer, Just wait and see what comes to mind. How are you trying to help me? So what's coming to mind for me is that my busyness is trying to help me get everything done and there's a lot to do. So it's trying to help me not mess up and drop balls because I'm juggling a lot of different things. So I'm just letting my busyness know that I'm getting that and really appreciating that. So you can do the same if you're getting a sense of how your busy part is trying to help you. You may also want to ask your busy part, As part of being curious of what it's trying to notify you about, What is your busy part afraid would happen if it didn't show up and make you so busy? Again, Just ask the question, Wait to see if anything comes to mind. So what's coming up for me is again that I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to keep all the balls in the air or I would make a mistake or I would forget something. It's trying to help me not fail or mess up in those ways. But I also had a little less pronounced sense that my busy part is also trying to keep me so busy that I won't be able to slow down and feel some of the yucky feelings that are present. And that makes sense for sure. So I'm just letting my busy part know that I'm getting that. And whatever you're sensing your busy part is afraid would happen if it didn't keep you so busy. Let it know you're really getting that. It's making sense if it is. And so once it feels like you've got a really good sense of step two, What your busyness wants to notify you about, Then you're ready to move on to step three, Which is need. So just join me and let's together ask our busy, Overwhelmed parts, Is there anything you need from me right now to feel a little less panicky, A little more comfortable? And again, Don't try to think of the answer. Just wait and see if something comes to mind. Is there anything you need from me right now in my inner experience or my outer world in order to feel less panicky? So I had two things come up, One inner and one outer. So I had this image come to mind of a little like a tornado, A little bitty tornado, Kind of like in the old cartoons with Bugs Bunny and Roadrunner. And it has little eyeballs on it. You may not be a visual person with your inner experience. I happen to be, But not everyone is. So however you noticed it is great. But for me, This little tornado kind of was there and it's spinning, Spinning, Spinning. And in my inner world, What it wanted was a really comfy chair so it could just take a load off for a minute and quit spinning for a hot second. So I just allowed it to select the chair that it wanted and it stopped spinning and sat down and it was like, Oh, Thank you. But I had a sense that in my outer world, What this part of me needs from me is to do a better job with my weekly planning. This week I did not stick with my typical way that I map out my week and as a result I got a little bit ambushed by some things that were time-sensitive. And so that's the ask that my busy is making of me that in my outer world I stick to my Sunday evening routine and map out my week more thoughtfully so that I don't get ambushed and it doesn't have to amp up to try to deal with that. So I'm just going to set an intention to do that. And if in your inner experience you're getting a sense either imaginatively in your inside world or outside of you that you're busy overwhelmed part needs you to take an action or ask for help or do something so that it doesn't have to get so spun up, Then just notice that. If it needs something like an easy chair like mine did, Go ahead and provide that in your mind's eye. It's your own imaginal experience so you can make anything that you want, Anything that your busy part wants. Kind of wild but that does help the busy to feel better. And if there's anything in your external world that your busyness needed from you, If it feels right to just jot yourself a note about that or write it down or set an intention or put a reminder on your phone to do that thing, That would be really valuable to build trust with this busy part of you so that it doesn't have to spin up quite so intensely in the future. If you noticed as many of us do that the busy part was trying to keep you super busy so that you didn't have to face what your life was really containing in this moment or feel the feelings that are right there under the surface when you get still, Then perhaps the invitation may be to do a move toward with Jenna video on those things or seek out a safe friend or a trusted counselor or a spiritual advisor to help you sort through some of those realities that are right there for you right under the surface. Whatever you noticed, Just thanking your busyness for communicating with you today. If it did, Sharing these insights with you. And then if that feels complete for you for now, Just extending gratitude and warmth from your heart to this busy, Exhausted part of you, As I will do to my little tornado guy. And yes, Our parts can be any gender or no gender, That's totally normal. And when you're ready, Just kind of moving your hands and feet and gently drawing your attention back out to the room around you and opening your eyes and rejoining me. So thank you, My friends. What a wonderful opportunity for us together to get to spend time moving toward our busyness. I hope this was helpful for you. Until next time, May our thoughts move toward, May our words move toward, May our hearts move toward with love and compassion. Thank you for joining me. I'll see you next time.

Reviews

Interestingly, a party of me that was watching during the video wants me to thank Jenna on his behalf for these meditations that are helping my inner world so much. So thanks Jenna!