No One Can Give Us Freedom!

Feeling Free is one of the most desired aspects of our lives and we all strive for that - at work, in relationships, and in different roles we play in society. But what is freedom? Where can I find it?

This Meditation is an exploration of Freedom at a fundamental level - what it means? what it feels like? how to get it? where to find it?

This contemplation is all about these simple questions that we seldom ask ourselves. But also about recognizing the innate freedom that we have and how we give it up and project it to another person/situation/thing.

Transcript

If our eyes automatically close during this contemplation,

Don't force them to leave open or don't force them to close either.

Just be natural as the words fall on our ears and touch our hearts.

One of my favorite words,

If not the most favorite word in English language,

Is this word freedom.

And I want to explore this freedom with all of you today.

I don't want to explore the specifics of freedom that is prevalent in our society.

Although I do want to make a distinction about what,

Where I want to go,

Using how it is used in common parlance.

Freedom is almost always used in the context of doing things or being able to do things.

So it's a very physical,

Worldly thing.

It's very action oriented thing.

Freedom to do this,

Freedom to do that.

Freedom to live the way we want,

Freedom to identify.

Freedom to go anywhere,

Wear whatever,

Say whatever.

And I'm not against any of those things.

That's not where I want to explore today.

I want to go a little more surgical and a little deeper.

The biggest,

The biggest,

If not one of the biggest desires that we all have is to feel free.

That's it.

To feel free.

That's why countries strive for freedom because it's an innate desire,

Whether individual or collective,

To feel free.

The kind of work we choose,

The kind of schools we send our kids to,

The kind of groups we join.

We seek freedom.

And because we don't know how to feel free,

We try to go to that feeling in a roundabout way by doing things that signify freedom,

Sometimes fighting for things that signify freedom in order to feel free.

When it comes to work,

Especially when it comes to some relationships,

Whether intimate or not,

Family or not,

Circumstances or not.

If I were to ask you a question,

Do you feel free?

What would your response be?

If I asked you a question right now,

Without any context,

Of course,

There'll be a resounding yes,

I feel free.

Tuning into today's session is an act of freedom.

Being present,

Listening to someone talk about freedom is an act of freedom.

I have no qualifications to talk about anything,

Yet you're choosing to listen to me.

It's an act of freedom.

Now you understand where I'm going with it.

I'm going to the fundamental level of what it is to feel free.

And the reason feeling is important is conceptually,

Yes,

We can prove that we have freedom.

We are in a free country.

We work for a big organization.

We have a job,

Etc.

,

Etc.

We are married,

Not married,

Whatever,

Right?

Yes,

Therefore I have freedom.

But feeling is the most accurate metric.

And feelings don't lie.

And feelings are not for others.

Feelings are for ourselves.

So it's very important to be free.

It's even more important to feel free.

And freedom is such a weird thing.

If someone gives it to us,

We might feel like it's freedom.

But deep down,

Soon enough,

We will realize that we don't feel free because that freedom is borrowed freedom.

It's given by someone else.

I remember watching a movie years ago,

And especially in societies which are very patriarchal,

Conservative.

The husband was explaining about how he has given freedom to the wife.

And the seed of this contemplation is probably sown at that time.

Where someone in the scene talks about how can you give someone freedom?

It's not something that we can order off of Amazon or go to Walmart.

Yet we wait.

We wait for someone to give us freedom.

Our managers,

Our family members,

Our teachers.

Some of us spend our lives,

Years,

If not decades,

Waiting to get the autonomy to do something great at work.

Not to pursue our dreams that we want to pursue in our area of interest.

We wait for our parents,

We wait for our husbands,

Wives,

Kids,

Managers,

Companies,

Government to give us that freedom.

And in some cases it might even make sense.

Not all freedoms are alike.

If you want to do something specific,

Yes,

For some of them,

Yes,

It makes sense.

But the freedom that I'm talking about is the mundane,

Everyday lack of freedom that we feel,

Especially at work,

Especially in our relationships.

For some men,

And again,

I don't want this to be a gender specific thing,

I'm just sharing my experience and my perspective.

For some men,

It's very hard to feel being heard,

Being seen.

I'm sure the same must be true for women.

And there have been movements along the history to point this out,

To incite a renaissance,

A rebellion against how things are.

And to not wait around,

But to go and grab it,

To grab the freedom,

To grab the rights.

But again,

That's not what I'm talking about.

I'm talking about the freedom of everyday living,

Where we are waiting,

Waiting to become free of this situation,

Whether financial or circumstantial.

We're waiting to get the authority to influence a change,

Affect a change,

To influence people,

Even though our intentions are very noble.

We think we don't have the freedom.

And if we were to articulate,

We will find all the points.

I'm not saying there's not enough reasons to feel that way.

No.

Because if we start enlisting the points,

Yes,

All of them will feel logical.

But all of those points put the autonomy,

The agency,

The freedom in someone else's hands and makes us feel like a victim.

So being in a free country,

Free society,

We feel prisoned.

We feel like we are in a prison.

And I see this very often at work,

Where a lot of us feel imprisoned.

We wait for a better boss,

Better times financially.

But ask yourself,

If that were to happen,

Whatever that is,

Whatever we are waiting for,

If that were to happen,

It would imply that freedom is an act,

A particular action,

A particular event.

And like all events,

There is a beginning,

A middle and end.

Which means the freedom that will happen will also be taken away at some point of time.

And are we waiting for that kind of freedom?

Is it worth waiting around for that fraction of freedom?

Or are we looking for something which is true freedom,

Which is not dependent on someone to take away?

And if we are waiting for true,

Long-lasting freedom,

Then what makes you think it's not here right now?

We can feel free even without being free.

Once we accept something,

We are free.

Once we fight something,

We are not free.

That's how simple it is.

We can be free,

We can feel free and fight for something.

That's a next level of renaissance.

I'm sure the question must be arising in your mind is to,

How do I feel free then?

If freedom can't be given to me,

How do I get it?

That's where we need to upgrade our perspective to not look at freedom as a freedom to act,

But a freedom to be.

An action comes from freedom,

Is not for freedom.

Like right now,

You being here,

It comes from freedom.

In order to be free,

We have to recognize that we are free.

If we removed the mindset to act like a victim,

To take our freedom and to give it to someone else and think that they have freedom is absurd.

We have to recognize that the freedom is always ours.

And you'll be surprised how handsomely you get rewarded in work and kind,

Even at work,

Where you come from a place of freedom that yes,

I belong here.

This is my place.

I will do something to make this place better.

And then get the necessary skill set to negotiate,

To talk,

To leverage whatever you're trying to improve.

And this,

Although I'm saying it and it has a connotation of manipulation in it.

My intention is to communicate that freedom,

The recognition of freedom and the acting on freedom can come from a place of kindness,

From a place of truth,

Love and beauty.

Not necessarily from a place of selfishness,

From unkindness,

From ego.

And you will notice that there are people around us who feel free and they use their freedom to their advantage.

Again,

That's not something I'm encouraging.

Recognizing of freedom should be nourishing to our hearts.

It's a very nourishing world,

Even to listen to freedom.

To feel free is an act of nourishment,

Is an act of grace.

And to exercise it is an act of celebration.

So we have to recognize this freedom within ourselves.

Sometimes we might have to reason with our minds.

Sometimes just chug along without paying attention to what our minds are saying.

And one ironic thing about freedom is it'll scare the shit out of us to feel that we have freedom.

It is a very scary thing to accept.

At the moment we accept it,

We are changed at a cellular level.

Because it betrays the reason we have been pausing for years,

If not decades.

That it's we are waiting for someone else's,

Someone else to do something.

I don't have the freedom.

I remember watching a reel on Instagram which said,

If you are faced with multiple choices to do something or not to do something,

Or to buy something or not to buy something,

Always choose the option that will make you freer.

And because we are in a roundabout way in love,

Being imprisoned,

Because that's what we have been going through for most of our lives,

Projected imprisonment through society,

Through family,

Through our culture,

Through education.

We choose an option which always creates more conflict in our lives.

So we can start becoming aware of all the conflicts that we have in our lives right now and seeing how one conflict is a result of two opposing choices.

It's like wanting to eat the cake and to keep it as well.

They made a meme out of it,

A phrase out of it,

Just for this kind of thinking.

So it will take a lot of courage.

Freedom is not cheap.

The recognition of freedom is definitely not easy.

But you can't unsee what you have seen.

You can't unhear what you just heard.

You can bury it under the carpet,

But it's there.

The seed is sown.

And the sooner we start watering,

The faster it grows.

It starts infusing in different areas of our lives.

I wish you the courage to recognize this freedom.

I wish you the clarity to see it already present in your life and the strength to act on it.

Thank you.