Self-betrayal is any moment that we abandon the essence of the self in order to gain or maintain Safety.
Approval.
Certainty or control.
It may be saying yes when the body really wants to say no.
It may be keeping quiet when the heart actually wants to speak.
And most times,
Self-betrayal is not done consciously.
It is a mechanism that is learnt in childhood.
And this is a teaching where the individual knows If I give away this,
I will receive love and connection.
So there is this trade-off.
And rather than lose connection with others.
One then loses connection with the self.
In adult years.
The voice of the child can still be heard through narratives such as.
I can't,
Or.
.
.
Life always just seems to happen to me.
Or I don't deserve this.
Those voices and that narrative is a sign,
A message from the inner child reaching out to the wise inner parent,
Asking for guidance.
So this narrative should never be confused for the reality,
For those thoughts are not the whole self.
They are signposts.
So one process that you can use to help yourself move out of a state of self-betrayal.
Is to train the mind and the body to know that you are not your thoughts.
And this can take some practice.
And this is beautifully illustrated.
And a traditional Zen tale.
Of a monk who was carrying his backpack with him everywhere.
And one day,
A fellow monk asked him,
What's in that sack on your back?
And the monk with the backpack said,
This is my life in here.
To which his friend replied,
No,
My friend.
Those are just memories of your life.
Please pause and take a moment to drop within,
Quietening the mind,
Closing the eyes if you and ask of yourself.
Where in my life am I carrying what no longer belongs to me?
What beliefs am I still protecting?
Whose voice do I think is my own?
And what thoughts am I ready to see transform?
Sit gently with your awareness.
Without any need to control or contrive.
Just being completely open.
Whatever is present with you right now.
And then when you're ready,
Gently moving your awareness.
To your body that's grounding down.
Slowly opening the eyes.
Rubbing the hands together,
And as you move through your day now,
Notice thoughts that arise.
Notice those which feel comforting and supportive.
And notice those which don't.
By honoring the difference between the two.
That self-awareness alone when practiced repeatedly over time.
Can support the system's innate intelligence.
To direct one.
To one's home frequency.
So from me to you.
Beautiful blessings.
On your journey ahead.
