Hi dear friends,
Welcome to my extra life today on this beautiful Wednesday where I will speak about how healing hearts heal hearts.
I so much love this.
How healing hearts heal hearts.
If you don't know me yet,
My name is Femke Böcker,
One of the meditation teachers here on Inside Timer.
And I have my regular weekly lives every Friday at 3.
30 pm Eastern Time,
9.
30 pm Central European Time,
Which is my time I'm residing in the Netherlands.
And I'm so happy that you are here and I would love to hear from you,
Where you are in the world and what you feel that a healing heart is.
I would love to hear from you.
So we're just one minute in.
Let's take a few minutes for everyone to join me and then I will start.
What I normally do in these lives is first I hold a brief talk about the topic of the day and every life I have a different topic.
But in the end,
If you are listening to more of my lives or you're listening to my work on Inside Timer,
Whether it's the courses or it's the guided tracks or maybe you visit my workshops,
Then you know that at the core of everything I teach stands you being as kind and gentle as you can be to yourself.
I have coined that concept as self gentleness not so long ago.
And it is because I discovered that this word self gentleness doesn't really exist as such.
Well we all understand in a way and we speak a lot about self love but the word self love has a connotation already for a lot of people and self kindness which is really clear.
A lot of people are working on that but self gentleness.
I want to explain to you why I like the word self gentleness.
It is because it sounds easier than self love.
If someone tells you you have to love yourself or learn to love yourself,
That sounds like a big task,
Something that will take you quite some time.
Especially if you know you have some things that you're tripping over.
I think in general we can feel yeah we love ourselves but when we start to really work on that,
It might be difficult a little bit.
But self gentleness,
To be gentle with yourself,
That sounds like a more easy task.
Maybe not always as easy but for sure easier than self love.
And that is why I love that concept self gentleness.
So every topic that I discuss has to do something with that.
I want to empower you,
To self empower you,
To show you what kind of tools,
Especially meditative tools but sometimes also other practices you can use to become gentle and kind to yourself.
And with all the topics I go over,
These connect with this concept of self gentleness.
Also today,
Healing hearts heal hearts.
But let me just take a look at the comments.
A healing heart is a whole heart that is strong.
That's beautiful said.
Yes,
I really liked it.
Thank you so much for sharing Adora.
Andrea,
Good morning from New Zealand.
Sorry that you are here,
It must be pretty early for you on Thursday morning.
You are always working on healing and clearing your heart.
That's beautiful.
And how you go about that Andrea?
I would love to hear from you.
Michael says we shouldn't need to learn to love ourselves.
I agree.
But it's like an artifact of life I think.
Because when we grow up as kids,
You know,
We have to learn a lot.
And we learn a lot from our parents,
Our families,
Our societies,
Our teachers.
And all of those people have with all the best intentions,
Ideas about what's the best way to live.
What's the best way for you to live.
So they're trying to help you with that by setting rules,
Shaping expectations so that you know what is the framework you can walk in.
And there's not so much wrong in that.
And most folks do this with the best intentions.
But there comes a certain moment that we,
Especially when we're children,
But also as adults it happens,
That the validation of others is important for us to feel loved.
That we feel that if we fulfill expectations,
If we,
You know,
Dance the dance as is expected of us,
That that are the moments that we are truly loved,
That we are validated,
That we are worthy.
And there lies the mistake because we are always loved.
And we're always worthy.
That we are kind of trained to look to others to have that feeling.
So I agree with you.
We shouldn't have to learn that.
And I think that every baby,
Every baby being is born with loving themselves and knowing that really,
Really deeply.
But it is within that process where we sometimes lose parts of ourselves.
And sometimes it's only small parts.
Sometimes it's bigger.
And sometimes,
You know,
Unfortunate things happen to people or to children.
And I'm not even speaking about really big things,
Which might also be,
But sometimes it can just be,
You know,
You're dropping something and your parent being in a bit of a cranky mood and saying,
Ah,
You're always doing everything wrong.
And then as a kid,
You store this as,
Oof,
I'm doing something wrong.
And it's,
You know,
These things happen.
It's life.
But these things add up and I think it is our quest.
I don't want to make it too heavy.
I don't want to call it a task.
But this is our journey to re-find that basic feeling of love for ourselves with which we were born.
So that we can heal our own heart,
Whatever pain or scars or wounds there are in our hearts.
And with this healing,
We can start to heal others.
But I will tell you more about that.
Andrea says how I asked Andrea a little while ago how she works on healing our heart.
And she says,
I've spent time alone,
Music,
Gentleness,
Awareness,
Being in the moment and recognizing what the energy of your heart is.
Wow,
Andrea,
That sounds really beautiful.
It also sounds like you really find the connection to your heart and most importantly,
That you also take that time and space to make that connection.
Because I think we all can connect to our hearts,
But we don't always take the time for it because there are more pressing needs.
And you see on my face that I mean pressing needs.
Those are the expectations of everyone around us.
Let me be clear,
Those expectations are very often our own expectations.
Things that we think others expect from us,
Right?
I'm not blaming others.
I'm not blaming you.
I'm not blaming ourselves because that would not be gentle.
But some creating some awareness of that mechanism that is there.
Let's start with a talk.
I talked already a lot,
Of course,
But let's continue with that.
So healing hearts heal hearts.
Let's start with the healing of a heart.
So I think every human being has something of a heart that needs to be healed.
It can be really big or it can be really small.
And generally it's a mix of things.
We've all had fights with people that we love.
We all got disappointed in others or in situations.
We all got disappointed with ourselves.
There are a lot of things that we can feel vulnerable or sad or hurting about.
But you know what would be really,
Really great?
That if something would happen that we are hurt by,
That we feel an ache in our hearts,
That we would actually take the time to just feel what is going on there and to sit with that,
To let it be without making it bigger and without making it smaller,
Without trying to push it down,
To ignore it,
Because that's how wounds start to be there and why our hearts really need healing,
Because most of the people suppress their emotions,
Suppress their emotional responses to things that are going on in their surroundings or even within themselves.
But sometimes if we do allow ourselves to feel those feelings,
We sometimes tend to let them grow,
Let them grow bigger,
Let them take over a lot of our thought process,
To let them take over a big part of our life,
Taking over our responses in a way how we interact with others,
Because we have a wounded heart and we feel that our wounded heart speaks most loudly for everything that happens.
So again,
I'm speaking from gentleness towards you and from self-gentleness towards all of ourselves.
So there is no blame.
I'm not telling you that you're not doing it right,
Because that's absolutely not true.
You're doing it exactly right.
I'm here to show you that there are options whenever something happens that your heart is responding to and you feel that you are aching.
So one of the things is to be with an emotion.
And in my life next week,
I'm going to speak about how to deal with emotions.
So I'll dig a little bit deeper into that topic and explain you more about that.
But just for now,
Really briefly,
You can see an emotion as a physical response to things that you are thinking.
And now you might think,
Well,
Things that I'm thinking,
Someone is just telling me something really painful and then I start hurting.
Yeah.
But because someone is saying something painful,
You start to have thoughts about these.
And these thoughts do not have to be really conscious in your mind.
I mean,
Our minds,
Our brains are made to think,
Are made to observe,
Are made to notice things and they're noticing 11 billion bits in a second.
Well,
We can only be aware of 40 bits in a second.
So a lot of that stuff is stored in your unconscious,
Subconscious mind.
So when we have emotional responses to someone,
It's very often not just about what someone is doing,
But it's triggering,
You know,
Old stuff that is there.
So that is one thing to be aware of that process.
And that your body then responds to that thought,
Because there is a thought and that thought is generally unpleasant.
It's something that is that you are telling yourself,
Whether you are aware of it or not,
That you are not so kind to yourself,
Not so gentle to yourself.
And your body immediately responds with a stress response,
With an emotion.
So the key lies then in taking the time and space,
Preferably on your own alone,
You know,
Go to the restroom.
If you cannot go to your own room or other safe place to just be aware what is going on now in my body and to just experience the bodily response.
So sadness,
What do you feel?
Is it like a knot in your stomach?
Is it like your whole throat is like someone's,
You know,
Pulling down your throat and you cannot really swallow or speak?
Is it a burning of your eyes because you are tearing up?
There are all kinds of things going on in that.
By bringing your attention to those bodily responses,
You help yourself that you do not start to create stories in your head,
Because that is what we're used to do.
Someone is mean to us.
It's an emotion.
And then your head starts to raise with all kinds of thoughts that are supporting that feeling and basically increasing that unpleasant feeling.
And in this way it grows bigger and it cannot really get out of you.
Because if you would just observe it as a physical response,
Then you would be able to see that this physical response takes about 60 to 90 minutes.
I didn't invent that.
John Rosenberg is a psychologist and she studied this.
She's really a master in studying emotions.
She's a master in telling about that.
Take a look at the TEDx talks and Google John Rosenberg and emotions and you will find a lot of beautiful things there.
She tells us,
She researched this,
That this is a bodily response.
And if you just stick with this bodily response and observe that,
It's like a wave that can come through you.
So you can see the emotion like a wave,
Like at the sea or the ocean,
The wave is coming,
Getting higher and then it slowly,
Slowly dissipates and it goes away.
And then it might be there comes another wave,
But again,
This takes 60 to 90 seconds and it goes away.
And if you allow these emotions just to flow through your body again and again,
Like in the ocean after a storm,
The waves,
You know,
The tops becomes smaller,
They decrease and finally there comes more flat feeling and it,
The emotion has gone through you.
And with this,
The emotion has gone out of your system,
Unless you start thinking things again to reignite,
To,
You know,
To make a bigger storm again and you'll experience it again.
So the trick is not to ignore it,
Like we mostly do,
You know,
We suppress a lot of emotions during the day,
Not to make them bigger,
Not to respond or react in a way that we take it out on others,
But to take a moment and to be with our hearts.
So that's the one part of the healing heart.
That is what is me,
For me,
A healing heart or how we should basically treat our heart so that they,
They're not so wounded and they can heal.
But we have a lot of things stored there.
So the first step in this process is to connect to our hearts and see what needs to be healed and just work with that.
This is what we're going to do in a meditation in a minute.
The second part of the title of this life is heal hearts.
So what do I mean with that?
Well,
When we have wounded hearts,
When we have things going on,
This is very often triggering the way we think,
The way we react to things that are happening.
Like I just said,
Someone is being really nasty to you.
And then your response is very often not just towards that person,
But it's triggering all these old things behind you.
So very often in your reaction to the other,
You are bringing your history with you.
Someone who ever hurt you in a specific way that now is triggered,
It builds up and this is how you treat others at that moment.
Well,
If you are aware that you can heal your own heart and someone hurts you and you can take that moment for yourself and to actually be with that feeling and what it means to you,
You take a moment to be with yourself and to understand the value of the nastiness of that other person.
And please be aware,
I'm not saying that this means that you have to turn the other cheek.
I'm not saying that you should forgive them or be kind to them just like that.
No.
What I'm saying here that you can take responsibility of what's going on within you and that you can then pick a response that fits you,
That fits your heart.
And that response doesn't have to be,
Oh,
Okay,
I'm okay that you said that.
No.
But the response can be,
Listen,
With what you just said,
You really hurt me.
And I've known a lot of people in my life that have hurt me like this and I don't want that anymore.
So I'm asking you now to speak differently to me or we part ways.
It's simple like that.
Be one of the many,
Many answers that would just bubble up within you from your own heart.
It digs a little bit into a course that I have here on Inside Timer.
It's called how to tolerate challenging opinions and behaviors.
And it deals specifically with how you can interact or basically live in a society or family with people that are really,
Really different from you.
People that live lives in a way that you would never want to live your lives or even people that you feel that they are not so nice to other people.
So that's also not about turning the other cheek.
That course is really about empowering you to find your own values,
To empowering you to let go of your need that they will have to agree with you and that you find your own voice and your own strength in that.
So when I'm speaking about healing hearts,
Heal hearts,
I'm basically speaking about the same.
Because when you start this process of tuning in into your heart in difficult moments,
But also in not so difficult moments,
Then you build a special relationship with your heart.
And when you have this relationship,
It becomes easier to disconnect your first reaction,
Which is triggered through your past and everything that has been going on in your life.
But you take a moment to come with a response that resonates with who you really are,
With a person who is worthy,
With a person who is self-confident,
With a person that is self-loving,
With a person that understands their own emotions,
How to deal with it,
But also what you do want in your life and what you don't want in your life.
So of course,
This is not something that you can solve in just one meditation,
Not even in 10 meditations.
This is a lifelong process.
This is a process that you could start by learning to tune in into your heart.
Like Andrea just explained to us what she's doing.
She's spending time alone,
Listening to music,
Gentleness,
Awareness,
Being in the moment and recognizing what the energy of your heart is.
These are such beautiful sentences,
Such beautiful words.
Andrea,
She got it.
She understands what is the work that she can do.
And with this,
She self empowers.
She strengthens that connection with her heart.
And that changes the way you can see the world.
And it becomes way easier to have the bullies be bullies and just see it,
You know,
Just being on them even more at a certain moment.
You will not so quickly meet these folks anymore because your heart is just telling you to go to the left instead of the right,
Because it understands that on the right,
A bully is coming.
I'm promising you.
It's working like that.
It sounds simple and it is simple.
What we need to do,
We have to start to connect to our hearts.
We have to start to be as gentle as we can to ourselves.
Let's see.
Glenn asks.
What is the healthy level of thinking about something and allowing the process of feeling to occur and not avoiding the thoughts and feelings?
Well,
I think the healthy level of thinking would be also unique and personal to every person.
But I think it is.
When an emotion occurs,
A response occurs to bring your attention in the moment,
What is going on in the moment right now.
And that is a bodily response on something that just happened without bringing the past with it,
Without bringing the future,
What might happen,
What you might have to do,
What you want to protect yourself,
Just staying with that.
And when you learn to do that,
And that's a process,
Like I just said,
Because when we have racing minds,
It's really hard to calm that.
So meditation in itself is a great process to deal with your thoughts and also to make it easier to become aware of what things you're thinking in such a moment and how you can interact with that or not let go of them.
But then it is also trying to get a feel,
To feel out the things that you're thinking.
And you start to feel for thoughts that are better feeling,
For thoughts that are igniting a better feeling of the moment right now.
And so that's not when you're feeling really shitty and you have thoughts that belong to that.
You cannot just think,
Oh,
I want to be happy.
That's really far away.
But you could think,
Oh,
I'm really not feeling so good right now.
But you know what?
I've been here before and I know that I have survived every time.
You know what?
I know that this is just something that is passing.
And I also know that when I feel just my body,
I know that the emotion is just rolling through me like a wave.
Oh,
By just thinking that,
I feel a sense of relief.
I'm pretty good at thinking thoughts that are relaxing me a little bit.
I'm pretty good at feeling,
Oh,
I'm pretty good at feeling my way into a better feeling.
I'm pretty good at just shaking this off and leading myself to a better feeling place.
You know what?
I don't want to sit here.
I just want to get up and make myself a nice cup of tea.
And then I want to sit with a blanket over me and I just want to stare at my cup of tea.
Just the thought of that makes me feel better.
You know,
A process like that could happen.
But like I said,
That's individual.
If you would now take all my words and do that,
It might not resonate with you.
And you would think,
I still feel shitty.
But if you connected your heart and be kind to yourself,
Be gentle to yourself and just,
You know,
Try to listen to the good vibes that your heart is giving,
It can change.
It's slowly,
Slowly you can get to a better mood.
And when that ball starts rolling,
It rolls faster and faster and faster.
So that is basically a process that you could do.
Dora asked,
Why is it that a negative emotion is churning up lots of more negative thoughts that increase the bad feeling?
Is it survival instinct to protect?
It's a habit.
So yeah,
Basically our minds are warning us for bad things to happen.
But if you would be an animal,
Then this is just like an instinctive response to something bad that is happening.
But because we are thinking animals and we have a lot of thinking power and we have over the years of our life increased,
Created habits of thinking,
Especially those habits of thinking that are sometimes really unpleasant and negative about ourselves,
That it's really easy to trigger that because your mind is trained to push that button.
So that's what I was just speaking about,
Becoming aware of this process and then making a conscious and deliberate decision to let go of that,
To work on that.
And I know it's easily set,
More easily set than done,
But it can be done.
It is a process if you would just,
You know,
Throw yourself into this process,
You might just get there.
But let's not expect any quantum leaps of ourselves just taking it step by step,
Accepting that this is a lifelong process.
You know,
You took many,
Many years to set up those habits so it can take some time to let go of them also.
And somewhere also during our lives,
We were trained to sometimes like unpleasant emotions because sometimes it's more interesting than,
You know,
Being really calm and peaceful,
Especially when we are in our teenage years,
For instance.
So why do we like to see movies,
Horror movies or thrillers or stories where things go bad?
Because it gives us those emotions.
Also this deliberate choice,
If you want to engage with those emotions or not.
I made a decision a few years ago that I would not engage with literature or movies or music that would trigger emotions,
Deep emotions of sadness or feeling like a victim and all those kinds of things for some time.
And it really,
Really helped me to understand that I could find other things that were inspiring,
That were doing something else to me.
And now I'm more in balance and now I'm at the point that I can listen to that kind of music,
That I can see movies because the trigger is different.
I can see it more from a distance.
But when I'm in a more vulnerable state of being,
Which I am just like every human being,
Then I know,
No,
I'm not going there.
No,
I'm putting on something cheerful,
Something happy,
Because I also know that that can help me basically look the other way.
But this is unique for everyone.
You know,
I know people who are not so much touched by music like I do.
They're way better and just listening to the music and being happy,
Whatever the tone of the music is.
So it really depends on you.
You tuning in with yourself and also in your heart and feeling it out.
What's good for me?
What is helpful?
How can I be gentle to myself?
That is basically what it is.
Randy says,
You may have spoken of this already,
I'm late,
But how do we deal with the heartbreak caused by so many tragic events that are going on in the world?
I did not speak about that yet,
Randy.
Yeah,
Of course,
There's a lot of terrible things going on in the world.
And I also find it hard from time to time to not be heartbroken about that.
But then I always remind myself that by me being heartbroken with them,
I do not empower myself to be part of a solution.
And with solutions,
Especially when it's about wars,
For instance,
Or terrible things that groups of people do to other peoples,
You know,
You're just one person.
You cannot change the whole world by yourself.
But you can be part of a solution by allowing yourself to be the person that you are,
Allowing yourself to be the loving,
Worthy person that you are.
Because when you start allowing this,
You start to radiate this.
And when you radiate this,
You attract other people who are like you.
And together you can find a voice.
You cannot help people that are suffering by suffering yourself.
You can help people that are suffering by keeping the light within you and knowing that there are solutions,
By knowing that there are ways to help them without you suffering with them.
And I know that when you connect to that power of your intuition,
That power of your heart,
You will get to ideas where you can bring your own modest part of the solution.
Because as you have experienced,
If you are heartbroken because of the terrible things that are going on,
And maybe rightfully so,
But you lose your power.
You lose your power to find solutions.
You lose your power to be of help.
So it connects a little bit of something I spoke about not so long ago,
Where I said why I would advocate compassion over being empathical.
Because with being empathical,
You are feeling with other what they are feeling.
So someone is suffering,
You're suffering with them and they might feel strengthened in you as a fellow sufferer,
But the solution will not come closer.
Well if you can be compassionate by really realising what is going on with the other,
By loving them,
By supporting them,
But also by holding this vision of a better future,
This knowing that there must be a solution.
It might take years,
It might take a second,
But just by knowing that,
You can become part of the solution.
And this is what I know and I have seen and you know,
When you look at some really great leaders in this world,
I'm mentioning someone like Nelson Mandela for instance,
Or Mahatma Gandhi,
Those were visionaries who refused to continue to go on a certain path where people were pushing against,
Who wanted to respond,
To react with the same violence,
But they decided to go to their self,
To self-empower and to be who they really were,
Beings of love and compassion and finding solutions from there.
And I know these are great names and you do not have to become one of those great names,
But for you,
Creating this process,
Healing your own heart,
Even when you see that others are hurt,
When you continue to heal your heart,
You find the power in any way that suits you.
To empower others and to heal others or to be at least part of that process.
Luanne says,
I limit my contact with news.
Really important things will come your way because you have an environment that will remind you and then you can selectively pick the information that you need to know because you want to inform yourself.
But being on the heat of the day with everything that's going on,
Especially in this global world where something happens on the other side of the world and 10 seconds later,
We know it,
It doesn't help our feeling of security,
Our feeling of safety.
It doesn't really help us.
So being really aware of how to deal with it,
That's really great choice,
Luanne.
Reni says,
I try last few months,
I offer donating 50% of my art sales,
But I cannot control if people are not buying and trying to help in ways I can.
Absolutely.
But that's so beautiful,
Reni.
If you can do that without suffering yourself,
Right,
Because that's also important,
Then you are contributing.
But it doesn't even have to be in money wise,
You know,
Just by holding that vision of a better future and spreading that,
Believing that,
It's really part of a solution because if one person starts to do it and more people start to do it,
It does create a power.
And I know it sounds really hippy dippy and it sounds soft and it sounds not like reality in this world,
But the reality doesn't work out so well,
Right,
With threatening and using violence.
Why not,
At least for yourself,
Try to get in this situation,
See where it leads.
And I know it's hard.
I cannot do it all the time,
But I try to get back and back there.
You know,
I'm a political scientist.
I study political phenomena.
I have to do it from time to time.
All right,
Let's meditate and then I will come back to your comments later on.
I'm really happy to see,
You know,
How it's inspiring you to share together also.
And I hope you're also sharing this with each other.
Just know that I have a meditation group.
It's called Femke's Meditation Group,
Where I love for you to share your things.
If I didn't respond to your comment or your question,
Just go there,
Write it up and I will respond as soon as I get there to answer your questions or to chat a little bit more with you about it.
Let's meditate.
Make sure you're sitting comfortable or you can lie down also if you like it.
Just take a moment to feel how you are sitting.
Are you relaxed?
Or did my talk aroused some emotions,
Some feelings of powerlessness?
That's okay,
You know,
Just be with it for a moment.
We're going to work with that.
That's okay.
Feel how your feet are on the ground.
And that's a great exercise.
You could do that any moment during the day just to feel your feet on the ground and feel the support of the earth below you.
Because the earth is always there supporting you.
It might sound silly,
But it's true.
It's there for you to support you,
To carry you with this enormous speed that we're floating through space.
It's supporting you,
Carrying you,
Making sure that you stick on it.
You don't fly off.
Feel your buttocks on the seat.
Lovely buttocks.
Soft cushions to sit on.
Just tell yourself that you love your buttocks.
I love my buttocks.
It's good to love our buttocks.
A lot of hearts need to heal because of the things we think of our buttocks.
I love my buttocks.
Gently close your eyes.
Settle and relax.
You feel tension somewhere in your body,
Then just bring your attention there and see if you can relax a little bit more.
All right.
Now I would like you to bring your attention to the center of your head.
Might take some time to bring it there.
If you find it hard to find the center of your head,
Then start on your crown of your head and then just like you're in a small elevator,
You let yourself descend to the center of your head.
And whatever is going on in your head,
Maybe it's quiet,
Maybe there are a lot of thoughts,
Maybe there are some thoughts.
Allow yourself to be in the middle of your head as if you are in the eye of a storm.
And if there are only a few thoughts,
Then it's not even a storm,
Just a bit of wind.
But if you have a lot of thoughts,
Then it might be like a tornado or that's okay,
You're in the middle,
There is some quietness there.
You don't have to engage with whatever is going on in your head.
Your focus is here in the middle.
See if you can just pull your attention all the way into the center of your head as if you're sitting behind your eyes,
Behind your third eye.
Really calm place.
And be aware that you can be here in silence.
While things might rush around you,
That's okay.
You can sit here like a party is going on around you,
Where you're just sitting here minding your own business,
Being with yourself.
Now let's slowly descend our attention from the center of our head all the way down to our heart.
And you can do it as fast or as slow as you like.
I will guide you.
It feels like you are slowly dropping down or maybe you feel more like a feather that is descending really slowly,
Dancing downwards into your throat,
Your neck,
Passing behind your collarbone,
Into your chest,
Dwelling in the space of your beautiful chest until it reaches your heart in the middle of your chest.
Can you feel yourself landing in your heart?
Do you recognize a specific feeling,
How that feels?
Might be an awareness.
For me I got a lot of tingling on my skin.
Maybe for you it was a realization or a feeling.
Maybe you heard a word.
Whatever your knowing is when you are docking into your heart.
Remember that.
So you will recognize it the next time.
Alright,
Now let your attention rest in your heart for a moment.
And if it helps you can also put your hands on your chest to support yourself,
To keep your attention there.
Hello heart.
Hi.
You can greet your heart in your own way or you can use the words I use.
Hello heart.
How are you today?
Lovely heart,
You are making me smile.
So when you are connecting with your heart,
It might be that an emotion pops up.
So with me I am really feeling like this rush of feeling loved and happy is flowing over me.
But it might be something else for you.
It might also be that you are connecting to an emotion that feels less pleasant.
But whatever it is,
Just greet it.
Greet your heart and ask your heart how it is feeling.
And then whatever that answer is,
Can you honor that feeling for a moment?
Just be with it.
So my feeling is making me smile.
So I just want to smile.
But if the feeling makes you want to cry,
Then that's ok,
You just cry.
But if you do so,
Remember the silence that you just had in your head and the silence you brought with you.
So all you are experiencing is this bodily sensation of your eyes tearing up.
And whatever you are feeling in your body that belongs to it.
Maybe you feel irritation because something that happened recently just bubbles up.
Just be with that feeling and realize how this feels in your body.
Where does this energy go?
So to speak with the words of Andrea.
What is the energy of your heart?
Maybe you feel like you need to move a little bit,
To shake a little bit.
You know,
Like when dogs are stressed,
They sometimes just shake to shake it off.
Maybe you feel like shaking it off.
And whatever emotion you are feeling right now,
Or maybe no emotion that you are feeling right now,
Because that is also a possibility.
Just let it allow it to be as it is,
As a bodily function,
As a way of your body to tell you,
Hey,
Here is an emotion and this is how it feels.
So let's work first with those that are experiencing an emotion that is unpleasant.
So really focus on where you feel this in your body,
What the bodily sensation is.
And if you notice that thoughts are bubbling up about this,
About this feeling,
Then bring your attention back to the sensation in your body and try to stick with that.
And if that is hard,
Then bring your attention to your breathing for a moment.
Just to your nostrils,
Being aware of the air flowing in and the air flowing out.
And if it is hard to do,
That is okay.
You are doing it for the very first time.
You are just starting to practice.
That is okay.
You are doing it swell.
You are doing it perfect.
You are doing it exactly right.
So while you are with this feeling,
Let's now find together a thought that will help you to feel a little bit of relief.
So maybe this is a good thought.
So I am speaking for you right now.
Hey,
I am pretty good at experiencing this emotion.
I am pretty good at being aware of what is going on in my heart.
Well,
That is really great that I am doing that because you know what?
Before I was not so willing to be aware of that and now I am doing this so I guess I am growing.
I guess I am doing well.
I can connect with what is in my heart.
Wow.
I feel a little bit proud of myself that I can do that because I remember a time that I couldn't and now I am just doing this.
Wow and by realizing that,
I realize that feeling proud of myself is making me feel a little bit better.
Maybe it is not so bad to feel emotions,
To become aware of what is going on within me.
And it actually helps to just feel it as a bodily sensation.
It is a bit weird and I notice that I do want to think all kind of stories of the previous time I felt like this and why I am right to feel like this but you know what?
Today I will take a vacation of those thoughts,
Yes!
Today I will take a vacation of those thoughts and I promise myself every time I notice that unpleasant thoughts about whatever I am feeling are popping up,
I will tell myself with the gentle in the most gentle way,
I am taking a vacation of these thoughts today.
Tomorrow they can come,
Today I am taking a vacation.
By just thinking that I feel already better.
I feel a sense of how I can deal with these thoughts and it might not be every time like that but yeah,
Yeah,
This feels better.
I am proud of myself.
I know what I can do.
I know what I can do.
I know what I can do.
This is a whole new way of looking at me and my emotions.
Wow,
I am starting to heal my heart.
I love my heart.
It is here right in my chest.
I love my heart.
I love my heart.
This heart that is pounding for me,
Making sure that my body gets everything it needs.
This heart that is helping me to know what is going on.
This heart that is showing me the way to be gentle to myself,
To love myself.
I love my heart.
I don't know if you have been able to follow my thought process completely and if you couldn't,
That's okay.
It's a practice.
So I am recording this right now and after I have edited it,
I will put it online so you can practice again and again with it.
But I hope you understood the process.
Digging around,
Trying to feel what is relieving you and helping you to take a next step in that.
Alright,
Now those that are feeling in the connection,
A really happy feeling,
A good feeling,
A pleasant feeling.
And I hope that everyone with a not so good feeling might be able to join us now after we have lifted up a little bit together.
So make that connection to your heart and just experience where this feeling is in your body.
This feeling of happiness,
This feeling of joy,
This feeling of love,
This feeling of clarity,
This feeling of satisfaction,
This pleasant feeling that just lifts you up and makes you feel good.
It's okay now to find thoughts that enhance that,
If you like that.
Like I love my heart.
I love to connect with my heart.
It's so great to feel what's going on in here.
It's so great to experience this loving energy floating through my body.
I feel it on my skin.
I feel it in my bones.
I feel it behind my eyes.
I feel it in my heart.
You know what I feel like?
I feel like letting this feeling grow.
So I'm going to imagine together with everyone here that this feeling of love is like a big light in our chest.
And we are going to let this light expand from our chest.
So I'm going to use my breath to let it grow so every time I breathe in I see that it grows more and more into my chest.
But you know what?
Maybe I don't even need my breathing and can just use my imagination.
Let it grow into my arms,
My belly,
My neck,
My head,
My buttocks,
My thighs,
My legs until I am in a bubble of light that originates in my heart.
And let's just sit here for a moment and realize what you're feeling.
Feeling this connection of love in your heart and how this expands from your heart and it surrounds your whole body.
Let's see if we can expand it even more until this light fills the whole room where you are in.
So let it grow and when it grows it doesn't dilute.
No,
It grows bigger and stronger and brighter.
More colorful,
You can color it in a color that you love.
Let it expand until it fills the whole room that you are in.
And if there are other people in this room then your light is touching them.
And the moment your light is touching them you can imagine that they have a smile on their face.
Alright let's expand even more.
Let's grow out of this building that you are in.
Let it expand until the light is all around the building of your house.
Whether it's a small building or a big flat or maybe even a skyscraper,
It doesn't matter,
Just let it grow out.
Your heart is so powerful,
So powerful it can encompass everything.
Just imagine that while your light is expanding every being within your radius is being touched by your light and whether they are aware or not,
The moment your light touches them they will have a smile on their face.
No matter what they are feeling,
No matter what they are doing,
They will have this moment where they feel your love shining upon them.
Now let's expand this light even more until it surrounds the city or the town that you live in.
Let it grow and also now your light touches every being,
Every person,
Every animal,
Every plant,
Every tree,
Every flower,
Every insect and every being will have this rush of feeling loved,
Feeling worthy just because you shine your light upon them.
And when you are all around your town or village we are going to expand even more without diluting because your heart is just producing this loving light and we are going to expand this light until it surrounds our whole country,
Whether you live in a small country or in a big country,
It doesn't mind.
Just let your light grow and expand and touch every being that it meets and these are going to be so many beings you cannot really know and see them all but you don't have to.
Just knowing that every being is touched in their heart by your light,
That's already so beautiful in itself.
And let's now be bold and let our light expand even wider until we encompass this whole beautiful earth of ours.
And while you are doing that you might become aware of all the others in this meditation,
All these people that are meditating together right now and that everyone is spreading their light and that all these circles of light are starting to mix and blend and connect and empower.
And together we create this beautiful bubble of light around earth,
Shining upon earth and every being from small to big,
From insignificant to most important,
Every being is connected to our loving light,
The power of our heart.
And just let it shine.
And if there is someone in your life or if there is a situation in the world that you know that has made you sad and heartbroken then just feel the power of your heart right now.
It's really really hard to feel the heartbrokenness now and that's what I was speaking about.
Take your light and shine it towards this person.
Take your light or shine it towards the beings in this situation and just know that this is so powerful.
And if you feel it's hurting you then stop and go back to your own heart and send love to yourself because you cannot help others if you are suffering.
You need to empower yourself.
You need to send this love to yourself.
You might feel tears but they might be from being touched by this powerful feeling of connection and love.
Alright.
Now we're going to contract the light back to ourselves really really slowly and if you have felt this powerful expansion,
The power of this light then just know that by contracting it bringing it back towards your own heart you keep the power.
It just dances,
Dances slowly towards you bringing all this power to your heart empowering you to love yourself and others.
So bring the light back to your own country.
Bring the light back to your own town or city.
Bring the light back to your own building.
Bring the light back to your own room.
Bring the light back to your heart.
Can you feel that power?
Just know that you can send this power to someone or someone like a strong laser beam.
It's always here you just have to connect and be kind to yourself so you can tap into its power.
So just sit and set the intention for yourself to connect with your heart at least once a day for a minute and realize how powerful your heart is.
How beautiful you are,
How lovable you are,
How worthy you are.
All right,
You can let go of the intention.
Keep your eyes still closed,
Take a moment to get back into your body in a different way here and now.
You can move your fingers and toes,
Maybe stretch your spine a little bit.
And then slowly in your own time you can start to open your eyes but take your time.
All right,
I'll see you in yes,
Ma'am.
