Finding Stillness In The Storm

Feelings of overwhelm seem too common these days. An increasing number of people are struggling to calm their nervous system, which is why I've developed some effective strategies and tools to better navigate the highs and lows of life. In this short insight, I'll share my "Formula for Freedom" that will help you rewire your nervous system's ability to maintain calm and balance.

Transcript

Hello my fellow fallible human. Welcome to the harmonious mind. This is a moment to slow down and settle your nervous system. My name is Tanya McIntyre, Your mindfulness mentor. These short reflections are designed to help you find steadiness, Perspective, And a gentler rhythm in your life. Let this meet you the way music does, Openly, Curiously, Without pressure. Hopefully there's nothing for you to achieve today and nowhere else you need to be. Just be here in the present moment. Today we'll explore how finding stillness in the storm can contribute to our better mental health. I recently sat with a client who is facing the unthinkable. Between the looming shadow of homelessness, The weight of past bankruptcy, And physical ailments that prevent them from working, They spoke of ending their life. This is a person who once navigated the heights of real estate investment. It's a stark reminder of how quickly the landscape of our lives can shift. Their story is actually a localized echo of a broader struggle that's happening, At least in this country. In Canada, Many of us are navigating the thin line between stability and crisis, With housing insecurity and debt becoming a collective weight. When we witness this level of suffering, It's easy to understand why those working on the front lines experience such profound burnout. It is heavy, Heavy work to hold space for people who are suffering. My path toward mindfulness was not born out of a casual interest. It was forged in the fire of my own survival. For most of my life, I have lived with mental health and addiction challenges. I have known the inside of residential facilities, I've known the fog of prescription medications, And I have certainly known the relentless cycle setbacks that often led me to suicidal ideations. For years, I wasn't sure if my ability to keep working was actually saving my life or simply keeping me just functional enough to remain miserable. What I eventually discovered is that while life is often a series of dire circumstances, Our relationship to suffering can evolve. We are all biochemically unique and we require different tools at different times in our lives. The goal, Or the acronym I like to use, The KEY, K-E-Y, Is keep educating yourself. And it isn't about finding a perfect cure. It's about building a personalized toolkit that helps you manage the volume of your inner critic. Remember, Our mind gradually takes the shape of what we frequently hold in thought. It's a crazy thing happening up there. I call it the itty-bitty shitty committee that never shuts up. But by practicing specific strategies, We don't necessarily stop the waves of life from coming, But we do become more skilled at surfing them. To navigate the highs and lows of life without relying solely on external numbing and prescription drugs or other drugs, Alcohol and other drugs, I have four pillars of practice that I call my formula for freedom. The first one is awareness, Recognizing that most of our thoughts are often unhelpful. And that can actually be helpful when we recognize that most of the thoughts are unhelpful. So once we see them as what they really are, Ants, Automatic negative thoughts, Then we can start to slow them down with mindful practices that create new paths with fewer ants. And then there's avoidance. We can be intentional about the environments and the people we allow into our space. Our lives are often the sum of the choices we make and the boundaries we set. I prefer to call them mutual respect lines. It sounds less aggressive. But we actually do become the company we keep. So make sure you are keeping the company of people who are lifting you up and not pulling you down. The next is attention. We want to stay focused on what is within our control. When we focus on those small manageable actions of the present moment, We naturally drown out the overwhelming narrative of the what-ifs. We can get lost in that madness if we let ourselves drift to the future and the unknown. I mean, Who was it? Mark Twain, I think, Who said the only certainty of life is life's uncertainty. Next is acceptance. This is a big one for me and it took me far too long to get here. So I'm hoping by me sharing my experience, It will help you expedite your journey along the path a little bit. This is another daily active practice. It's the bridge between resisting our reality and finding the peace necessary to change that reality to work in our favor. My favorite motto is, What can I do from where I am with what I have today? If 12-step doctrine taught me anything, It's to live one day at a time. That's all we have to do. Navigate the waves of life one day at a time. And if one day seems too much, Take it one minute, One breath at a time. So this unconditional acceptance and the unconditional is key here because I had lots of conditional acceptance in my life. Reaching unconditional acceptance for not only ourselves but for others and for life, The unpredictably life things that come up, That is a concept that I practice every day. Unconditional acceptance for myself, For others, And for life. It's a valuable tool to help manage our mental health. So I actually created a three-part course that I share on Insight Timer and I invite you to track it down there. I'm your mindfulness mentor on Insight Timer. I am so grateful to belong to a family of people who collectively want to share their experience, Strength, And hope with you, Hoping that we can smooth out that path for your journey, Wherever you're heading, As long as you keep setting your intention, Walking your path, Keeping your intentions, Your actions aligned with your intentions. You can't go wrong. Thank you so much for spending this time with me. I hope these reflections bring you a little more comfort, A little more clarity, And a little more calm. Join me for future episodes of The Harmonious Mind as we continue to explore practical ways to build better mental health. My name is Tanya McIntyre. I am your mindfulness mentor. Please keep showing up for yourself. Remember to talk to and treat yourself like you talk to and treat a friend. May the force of mindfulness be with you always. And remember, You are the force.