Day 30: This Was Never An Ending

Hello and welcome back.

This is day 30.

We made it.

We made it.

We made it.

So I can't believe it's 30.

It's been 30 days of showing up,

Of storytelling,

Of live transmission,

Of soul curriculum,

Of moving through this.

Soul art journey and offering all of the fruits from the orchard.

It has been a live transmission in the middle of the messiness of life,

But it's a beautiful process.

And I want to say thank you to everyone who's come and joined me and been in this with me.

Being here,

Showing up is showing up for yourself to learning along with me.

Whenever we do some kind of live transmission to have people with you brings it to a whole new level.

So thank you.

So today we're celebrating.

We are celebrating.

Practices and I have a I'm gonna show my soul art one more time because I realize I did a lot in the beginning but I and it's been here the whole time but I haven't in the last few weeks shown what the original soul art was so I'm gonna show that one more time and then we're gonna we're gonna chat because there's been some amazing things let's just start by grounding let's do that we're gonna close our eyes and breathe but instead of grounding into the feet let's go back into the heart I invite you to close your eyes for a minute and just allow your breath.

To be.

Just notice it.

Give it that snapshot moment.

Ah,

Yeah,

Wherever your breath is.

Notice it and take a hand and put it over your heart.

And feel your chest rise and fall with the breath.

Or maybe your chest isn't rising and falling,

And you're feeling the silence or the stillness there.

That is OK,

Too.

Remember,

We don't judge.

Inhaling and exhaling of your own accord in your own rhythm.

In your own pace.

Hmm.

And I want you to think back for the last month,

The last 30 days.

And it can be something you worked on here with me,

Or you heard me say,

Or it could be something just in your life.

Had an aha moment,

Or you had a big realization or a small realization,

Something that you moved through,

A journey that you took.

It might be something that you heard on the lives that I was talking about.

It might be something different.

And bring it into your heart.

Breathe it in.

And instead of feeling,

Grateful.

I want you to feel proud.

Of whatever you accomplished in that moment in the last 30 days.

We can always have gratitude,

Right?

But let's feel proud of yourself for showing up,

For having a moment.

For recognizing something,

For being open to something.

Just allow that.

That pride in your own journey.

Maybe it's a small decision you made.

Maybe it's something you thought about.

Maybe it's something you allowed land.

And let that blossom in blue in your heart.

Because if you can do it once,

You can do it a million other times.

So just allow that to bloom here.

Breathe it in,

Expand it.

Exhale.

Bring it back to its core,

Its center.

Inhale,

Expand it.

Exhale,

Bring it back to its core,

Its center.

Feel it in your heart.

Feel how beautiful you are,

That you can have all of these wonderful insights,

Aha moments,

Choices that you make that show up for yourself.

And when you're ready.

You can open your eyes.

So I want to say one thing that I haven't said yet,

Which is this whole journey started with a moment of fear that I had.

I was like,

Oh my God,

Major change is happening.

I can feel it.

I can feel something is shifting and I couldn't put my finger on it.

And I was like,

I don't know what this is going to take.

Of me and I was like,

I can feel it's intense,

Right?

And so I started this soul art journey.

And it started by not abandoning myself,

Right?

We talked about that yesterday.

Because in the middle of change and transformation,

I don't want to abandon myself,

Right?

I want to show up for myself.

We talked about that infinity symbol yesterday.

So I started this soul art journey I want to show up for myself and I created the art and I'll show you just because I haven't necessarily showed you in a while the actual art that I did.

This is the original piece that I started with.

And it was those cherry blossoms.

And then I added the spirals.

That is the spiral on it.

This is the full piece.

So from bottom to top,

You can only see a little piece of it when you're seeing it next to me.

I went through embodiment.

I embody different pieces.

I embodied different pieces of it,

Right?

That was all my embodiment.

We talked about that in the first like probably eight to nine to 10 days.

But that was my journey,

That was through the soul art.

And then once my soul art was done,

I wanted to work with inspired action.

And I wanted to continue on this journey during that inspired action.

Because when you do a soul art journey,

You don't finish just when your art's done,

You learn from it.

I thought,

I'm gonna have this shift,

Maybe what I should do is get rid of a bad habit.

And I was in my head,

I was mentally in my head.

So my spirit action was to get rid of a bad habit.

But I never wrote it down,

And I never signed it,

Which I always do.

And then I had started this 30 days of life,

Because I felt this pull to start working on it and transmitting it in real time.

I'm a human being,

You're a human being,

Right?

We're all going through this life together and I want to do it live.

I did that,

And then about eight days into the live,

I realized my spirit action was these lives.

My spirit action was this 30 days of transmission and being authentic and real and telling the stories.

And this is my spirit action.

So today I finished my spirit action.

And it's funny how it all comes through.

I was very mentally in it.

And then I was like,

No,

What,

This is not how it works.

This is not what I'm doing.

I can feel something else pulling me.

And that's how spirit action works.

It comes from the work itself.

And in these 30 days,

I didn't plan any of it.

It was all just waiting for me.

I'm going to do something with all of this,

Which is interesting.

Cause as I hitting this last piece of the spirit action,

I decided I'm going to put all of these 30 days into like some kind of book,

Not something new,

But the live transmissions that came from this so that people who want to join me in a 30 day journey can come along with me.

And I don't have any title or any publishing date or anything.

I'm just going to put it together in the next few weeks,

A record of what it looks like to be fully in an authentic,

In a journey,

The 30 days of truth.

And y'all,

Y'all witnessed the raw material,

My friends,

Half the days,

I was giving you what I was giving you,

It was still so raw.

I was still moving through it because it's literally been these 34 days that I've been in it.

And I'm going to be doing tracks and meditations and journaling that relate back to this journey on Insight Timer.

So you'll see those coming up.

But I wanted to say,

Before we start the practice,

Which is celebration,

Sometimes when we're in these journeys,

I was like,

I am showing up for myself,

Right?

Something else happened.

Something else happened in the last few days,

Very recently,

Yesterday,

The day before.

It started around the blue moon.

I started to see my family and my kids differently.

I started to see them not better,

But just more clearly.

She wanted to do a dance party.

So I brought her upstairs and we started to do the dance party.

And normally I would dance with her,

But I had this moment like,

I don't,

I don't want to dance.

I just want to witness.

I just want to witness.

And I saw her in her whole brilliant Piper-ness.

And I was watching her dance and story tell and be in her body and really inhabit everything.

And I just sat there and there were tears rolling down my eyes like this girl is going to love someone so dearly,

So much,

You know,

Like I just had this moment.

And then that same day I was sitting out on the porch and I heard my son up in the bedroom and he was playing bass and I heard his absolute mastery of the base.

And he was doing red hot chili peppers,

Which is like one of my favorite.

And I just realized this kid is going to go places.

He's going to go places and I don't have to worry about him.

And I had this moment again,

Tears down my eyes,

Tears down my eyes.

And I'm just sitting there so freaking grateful for these children in my life.

Right.

And then I had a moment on the stairs with my daughter and we were talking about the stories of the stars.

And I was asking her,

Do you feel,

Do you feel the difference in the astrology when these things come up?

And we started watching all of these narrative stories about what the stars mean and almost like the characters of the stars.

And we sat there for like an hour and a half and we were just laughing and talking and I was like and she's gonna be 17 and Again,

I felt the tears were well up.

I'm like,

This is my life.

This is amazing You know all of these little pieces so even outside of my own Growing doing a journey like this going in and and really living in the transmission of it has allowed me to be more present more fully clear with my kids to see their gifts to see I mean I always saw their gifts,

But just sitting there and feeling it,

Right?

Just really feeling it.

It doesn't sound like a breakthrough necessarily,

Right?

But it's when you stop abandoning yourself,

You stop performing,

You stop fixing and managing and joining that you actually get to see what's there.

The beauty of it,

Right?

It's a miracle.

It really is.

And I'm dancing,

Playing bass,

Telling stories.

That's what the orchard looks like when you stop to see the fruit.

And it makes everything worth it.

It makes everything worth it.

It's just been such a joy and I thank everyone who's come along with me.

We're going to do a little bit of a celebration practice today.

And I,

As you know,

I can't dance because I have a child sleeping behind me,

But I will be dancing tonight.

My kids are performing and I'm going to be dancing it up,

Celebrating all of this.

Um,

But I,

I offer you to maybe for this practice to get up,

Not sit or lay down,

But stand on your feet,

Be on your feet.

You don't have to,

You can do it just like me sitting here because I have a sleeping child,

But you don't,

You can.

You have the opportunity to get up,

Stand up,

Feel your feet on the ground.

I offer that to you.

If you want,

Right now,

Stand up.

Push the chair back,

Find the space around you and take up space.

We're going to do something really simple,

Right?

Your body already knows how to do it.

We're not going to do a crazy dance right now,

But we're just going to feel the space our body takes up.

So just for a moment,

Just take a breath in.

Feel your feet on the ground.

Breathe it out.

Inhale,

Feel your feet on the ground.

And on the exhale,

Let your arms raise up,

Rise up.

Feel the space as it moves past your arms.

And then just drop it.

Inhale.

And on the exhale,

Let your arms rise.

And this time on the inhale,

Open your arms.

Let your head go back.

Just feel the openness of your body.

And then on the exhale,

Drop it down.

And let your hands shake it out.

Shake it out.

Let your arms shake it out,

Your elbows,

Your shoulders,

Your head,

Your neck,

Shake it out.

Feel the aliveness in your body.

Yeah,

Just feel it everywhere.

There is so much life in your body to celebrate.

It is amazing.

So this is just the beginning,

This is just the beginning,

Moving,

Taking up space,

Beginning to be with the aliveness in your body.

Take a breath after just shaking out.

Inhaling.

Feel all of that tingling,

All of that energy moving,

All of that chi,

All of that life force,

And let it out with a sigh.

Ha.

Inhaling again.

Maybe you have an intention you're working on.

Let that intention out.

I am showing up for myself,

Right?

Whatever it is,

That's mine.

Do it one more time,

Inhale.

Exhale,

Let that intention or that word or that sound,

Whatever,

Come out.

I am showing up for myself.

Ah,

Yeah,

And feel the yes.

Feel the Yes.

So I'm going to offer this other.

Practice for you when you get done.

Because one of the things,

When I finish up a journey,

One of the things I always do is I take a picture of myself.

And the reason I do that is to remind myself of what I've done.

And so my offer to you is after this live,

Sit with yourself,

Really allow yourself to bring to your mind something that over the last 30 days you are proud of,

Something that you've stuck with,

That you've showed up for yourself,

Whatever that be,

Right?

Let you breathe into it.

Feel it in your heart,

Feel it in your hands,

Feel it in your belly,

Feel it in your feet,

Everything,

All of,

Even if it's a tiny moment of showing up for yourself,

Right?

If it might be something physical,

Like I didn't have coffee this day,

Or it might be something really big.

Like I spoke my mind.

Or it might be an aha moment whatever it be breathe in and out allow yourself to expand and contract with it and when you are fully full stay in it until you feel it in every cell stay in it right until you really feel what you did even if it's tiny And then when you're there,

And you have felt it,

And you feel fully in it,

Have your phone there ready ahead of time.

Take a picture of yourself when you open your eyes.

So you feel full,

You open your eyes,

Take a picture of yourself.

And make sure you look at that picture.

It's like a selfie project almost,

Right?

And see your soul in yourself.

Right?

No judging the looks.

See that fullness in your own eyes,

In your own skin,

In your own body.

And look at that when you need to move through something.

Know that you've done it before,

Right?

Know that it is something that is not new to you.

It is a beautiful practice to do that.

And I have a whole little album of pictures and selfies after moments and after journeys,

And I always go back.

And maybe when I take that picture the first time,

I don't love it.

But when I go back a month later to look at those moments that I actually moved through things,

It is so different than when I first took it.

So,

You know,

Do that for yourself.

And then if you can,

Man,

Dance party it out.

Dance party.

That's it.

Just let yourself put on some music.

Let your body move.

Don't judge it.

Just allow your body to move.

You might want to jump,

Shake.

I'll be doing,

You know,

My kids today are doing an 80s band,

So I will be rocking to the 80s tonight because I deserve it.

30 days.

You deserve it,

My friends.

We are all in this human experience,

This human life right now,

And we get to have transformations and we get to have aha moments and we to show up for ourselves because that's how cool this life is.

And as we do it,

Things shift around us and we see what really is important,

What the real purpose of life is,

Right?

And we see where we wanna be or where we don't wanna be.

And we get to make those choices,

We get to.

So I'm going to give you a few questions today.

And it's not integration questions.

It's celebratory questions.

So you can let them fly away,

Grab onto them,

Whatever you'd like.

What is the one thing that these 30 days,

Or from your own journey alongside of it,

That you will carry forward,

Not as a lesson,

But as a living part of who you are now?

What habit,

Pattern,

Or voice did you quiet during this time,

Even a little,

And what filled the space when it left.

Who did you show up for yourself for when no one was watching?

Can you feel the significance of that?

Who did you show up for yourself for when no one was watching you?

That is significant.

Kind of inspired action can you take now?

Can you take an inspired action,

One thing that you do,

Inspired spirit action,

Whatever it be.

It might start with a small,

Honest yes on an ordinary morning.

And what would you say to the version of you?

30 days ago.

Remember,

Sometime in this journey,

I said to you,

Every 30 days,

Every month,

Or every three months,

Make a list of what you've done.

Look at it.

See how far you've come.

Because we don't realize it.

Time moves like this linear way when we're here,

Right?

And so we don't get to always catch and see everything we've done.

So every month or every three months,

Write down what you've done.

Look at what you've done in the last 30 days,

Right?

And what would you say to yourself 30 days ago if you could?

So 30 days.

Change.

I can feel in my bones,

In myself,

That I have changed.

You didn't just witness my becoming,

But you also have your own becoming because you're part of this.

I am opening this up to everybody who came along and joined.

You are part of it.

You have been becoming alongside me.

You have been learning and I've transmitted this to you as well.

So that's what happens when we show up honestly for each other.

So wherever you are in your journey,

Whatever habit you want to release,

Whatever part of yourself is waiting on a carousel that you want to Bring back whatever book you wrote and didn't show anyone,

Whatever thread you've been weaving and you didn't even know it.

It's time to make that spirit action,

That inspired action,

And it can be so simple.

It doesn't have to be 30 days of lives and ordinary moments.

This journey itself is the teaching.

And I hope that you got something from it.

And this was never an ending.

I called it a beginning.

Because as yesterday talked about the infinity,

I called it a beginning because it's like,

Okay,

Now my inspired action is done.

My spirit action is done,

Right?

This was never an ending.

It was always the beginning of showing up for myself.

And I hope that you too show up for yourself.

If you feel called,

Um,

I'm always so thankful for,

Uh,

Donations if you feel called to donate.

So if you want to catch any of the days I,

They are on insight timer.

All of the themes are on there.

So it's not just day one,

Day two,

Day three,

But all the themes from each day are on there and you can redo this journey anytime you want with me.

It has all kinds of different,

I mean we went through everything from like embodiment to soul art,

To looking at things in different orientations,

To how we can work with injuries.

It's been pretty amazing.

Go take a selfie.

Go be in the fullness of what you've done for yourself.

Go look at your last 30 days.

Go have a dance party.

And even if that dance party is just swaying to some,

I don't know,

Fleetwood Mac,

I will see you on the other side,

My friends.

Thank you so much for coming along,

And I will see you soon.

Namaste.