Take A Chance And Do It Anyway!

We all have ideas, goals, or dreams that we want to accomplish and oftentimes we like to run those ideas by our trusted friends, family or partners. How often do we table or shelve those ideas when the feedback we receive is less than supportive or negative? When we learn that the feedback is a projection of the speaker, that can empower us to hear it from a different perspective and also to choose not to take it personally. It can also empower us to table or shelve the feedback, take a chance and do it anyway! Background music by Narek Mirzaei, Relaxation (8Hz).

Transcript

You are here and it is now. I'm Tiffany, And welcome to Life Unedited Sanctuary. Where reality happens. Life Unedited is the practice of radical acceptance of life at face value through the lens of reality therapy theories. Today's theory encourages us to ground into our authenticity and self-trust with our ambitions by taking that chance and doing it anyway. I have this idea, Dream, Or goal, And I don't know whether I should go for it. I turn to a trusted person for a second opinion. And my partner, Parent, Or friend. Says it is stupid, Unrealistic, Or not worthwhile. As a counselor, I have heard different versions of this over the years with clients. So often so that it is sad. What are we saying to one another? Today, I heard it again in a conversation with H. And I felt the pull to write about it because I hear it so often and because it reminded me of examples from my own life. H's story was the proverbial straw. H wants to write a book. She reached out to me to discuss her thoughts for a couple of reasons. First because she follows me on Facebook and watched my journey of self-publishing my own book, Workbook, And Oracle deck. Second, Because she said, I know I can trust you. She told me that when she shared her idea with her partner, One of the things he said was, Who would read it? He then went on to belittle her for her idea and basically discouraged her in a hurtful manner. I'm sure many people can relate to this on some level, And I would like to tease this apart through the lens of reality therapy and radical acceptance, As I did for H. When speaking with someone, Anyone. We have to remember that all communication is a projection of the speaker. We are all mirrors for one another, And the speaker is projecting their stuff toward us. Yet. They are really speaking to themselves about themselves. H's partner's comments were aimed at her. Yet not about her. Her vulnerability to share her personal dream and her courage to want to put that dream into writing for anyone to read. Touched an unhealed wound in her partner. Which activated his ego, And his ego that judge, Inner critic, And our own worst enemy inside all of us. Reminded him of his unconscious belief that he is not good enough. Her partner became insecure and fearful, Though he would never admit it. It could be fear of age accomplishing such a monumental goal. Or of her possibly achieving some kind of success beyond him. More than likely, It was a fear and insecurity of his never being good enough. So rather than encouraging her. Which would be him encouraging himself as well. He chose the opposite approach. He projected his feelings of not good enough onto her to keep her stuck in his not good enough with him. Misery loves company after all. I had a similar experience when I wrote my book. I had a similar experience when I wrote my book, Only it did not involve another person. It was me versus me. I wrote it in like 2013 and then put it into a drawer until 2025. I like to say it was germinating. Throughout the years, I would pull it out and start to reread and edit it. I never made it more than a page or two before my ego would start in on me saying, No one will read this. This isn't worthwhile. People will criticize it. All different versions of you're not good enough. So back into the drawer it went. Then, In 2025, I took a leap of faith. I gave it to a friend who had self-published herself and offered what I call a publishing coach program. I didn't read it first, I just handed it to her and said, Tell me what you think. Four months later, With her help, I was self-published along with an accompanying workbook, Oracle Deck, And online coaching program. Now roughly a year after having my friend read through the draft, I also offer workshops locally in my community, Facilitate an ongoing eight-week group, And am embarking on a podcast all related to the book I let germinate in a drawer for nearly 12 years because I was afraid that I was not good enough. H's story also reminded me of my senior year of high school when my classmates and I were filling out our college applications. I sought advice from our school guidance counselor, Sister V, About one college in particular. She literally told me not to bother applying because they would never accept me. Honestly, That was the last thing I thought I would hear from my guidance counselor. And I took that as a straight up challenge. See, I would actually go on to be voted most rebellious of my class. And I not only applied to that college, I was also accepted. That was a proud moment, Showing that acceptance letter to Sister V. All of this is to say that if we have an idea, Dream, Or goal, Take the chance and do it. If we ask for feedback from a trusted person and they discourage us, Remember that they are projecting their own fear or insecurity about either their own not good enough belief. Or their memory of having had their own idea that they chose not to follow through on, Which is also linked to that core belief. In the case that we are questioning ourselves about whether or not to follow through with our idea, I have a radical practice. This practice involves trusting my gut instinct or intuition and trusting divine timing. That's a lot of trust in myself and the universe. I have a saying that I always come back to. If it's not a H-E double hoppy stitch yes, Then it's a no. That means if I'm not able to say yes definitively with my whole body, Then I say no. This is where divine timing comes into play, Like in the case of my manuscript. Like I said, Over the years, I would intermittently pull it out with the intention of re-reading and editing it each time I wouldn't get very far and I put it away. I firmly believe everything happens for a reason and when it is supposed to. So the fact that I wasn't able to commit to re-reading and editing on those occasions told me it wasn't time yet. When I took it out of the drawer in April 2025 and handed it to my friend. It was both an H-E double hockey sticks yes, And it was time. For a more in-depth dive with projection and divine timing. I would encourage you to listen to my tracks on those theories here on Insight Timer. Theory 9. All communication is projection. And. The radical acceptance of divine timing. I'm not good enough is a fiercely powerful belief so many of us carry. When we receive discouraging feedback from a trusted individual, It reinforces that belief. The only way to take the power out of it is to trust ourselves. Take the chance. And do it anyway.