Welcome,
My beautiful dreamer.
If your eyes aren't closed,
I invite you to close them now and just make yourself as comfortable as you can.
I'm so happy that you're here because I believe this journey could be revolutionary for your own heart and your own soul.
My hope is this inner adventure will hopefully liberate you from your mind for a little while so you can delve deep inside of yourself,
Inside your own inner being and forgive yourself of anything and everything wrong or bad that you think you did.
This is a deep inner adventure for self forgiveness.
So to begin,
Just take some nice,
Long,
Slow,
Deep breaths.
Each inhale brings you deeper into yourself.
And each exhale allows the outside world to fade further and further away.
Using your breath now,
Just let everything you don't need fade further and further away.
Because this is your time.
This is especially for you.
So you can heal yourself and transform your inner world so that you can live the most beautiful life.
Now please,
Using your underrated but very powerful imagination,
I'd like you to find yourself standing on a very familiar street,
The street where you lived once upon a time.
I'd like you to walk down this street,
Please,
Until you reach that home where you used to live,
Where that old version of you used to live.
A place that carries memories for you.
I want you to see it now,
But I want you to see it worn out,
Old,
Decayed.
I want you to see it like a house from an old life that no longer exists,
An old existence,
An old version of yourself from a very long time ago.
Now I promise you,
This house is not haunted.
There is nothing to fear inside this place.
This place lives inside you.
You have complete authority here.
So walk toward the house now,
Please,
And as you do,
Make sure you consciously feel the ground beneath your feet.
Feel yourself being held,
Loved and supported by the earth itself.
Now as you find yourself standing in front of the door,
Before you go any further,
Just place your own hand upon your own heart and repeat the following after me.
I am safe here.
This house belongs to me.
This is the house of my healing.
Nothing inside this house is here to hurt me.
Everything inside this place is here to help me heal.
I don't have to do anything a certain way.
I can do this my way.
I don't have to go back to the past in order to move on.
I only need to meet myself with love.
I am held.
I am protected.
I am ready to come back home to myself.
And as soon as you say those last words,
The door immediately opens.
Like everything you just said was the key to unlocking everything.
So please now walk inside and notice how the light spills across the hallway floor.
How dots of dust turn into tiny shiny planets in the beams of light.
The hallway is not as you remember it.
This hallway is narrow and long.
There are no doors.
Please walk down this corridor.
And notice how each step you take down this corridor feels important.
Feels courageous.
Feels electric.
That energy that you're feeling is the energy you left behind a long time ago.
And it's calling you back now to retrieve it.
At the far end of this long narrow hallway sits a small table.
And on this table is a single golden key.
And you immediately get the strangest feeling because somehow you knew this key would be here.
Like an old version of you left this key for you to find.
Please pick up this key now.
Feel its weight.
Feel its surprising warmth.
It's almost as if you can feel its heartbeat.
A heartbeat made of gold.
Its warmth grows stronger.
Its warmth starts to move from your hand into your wrist like a golden energy.
Up into your forearm.
Your shoulder.
Your chest.
And it settles straight into your heart.
Making you feel warm and golden and safe.
Now I'd like you to notice how three doors have mysteriously appeared in this hallway.
And I want you to choose one of the doors.
Slip the key into the lock.
And the lock opens.
Please now open the door and step inside.
The air is much cooler here.
Everything feels so quiet here.
The room feels like a held breath.
Like an important in-between place.
This room remembers the decisions you replayed over and over in your head way too many times.
This room remembers the choices you made that you now regret so deeply.
This room remembers the mistakes you made.
The wrong turns you took that you still haven't forgiven yourself for.
Now please notice there's a chair beneath an open window.
And on this chair is a box.
A box that's waiting for you.
So please pick up the box,
Sit down on the chair and place the box on your lap.
And when you're ready,
Open the box and find inside it ordinary objects from all those moments in time.
The moments you think you made mistakes,
You took wrong turns,
You failed.
Objects that symbolise those regrets.
Maybe there's a plane ticket.
Maybe a handwritten note from someone you hurt or someone that hurt you.
Maybe there's photographs,
Trinkets.
This is a box full of all of your regrets.
Now please remember you are safe to feel here.
You are safe with me.
You are allowed to feel.
You don't have to drown in it,
This is a portal,
Not a dark hole.
So now please let those memories rise out of you.
Let all your regrets rise like old ghosts,
Rising out of your body now and drifting away through the open window.
Let yourself feel whatever comes up,
But don't hold on to it,
Just feel it and let it go and drift out of the open window.
This is medicine for your heart and your soul.
This is how you love yourself back to life.
By letting go of all your regrets.
Now please say the following softly and deeply to yourself.
I am human and I was always supposed to make mistakes.
I am meant to be imperfect.
I was meant to take those wrong turns.
Because they got me here to this very moment.
I will not regret the past anymore.
Those regrets allowed me to break,
To learn,
To grow and to evolve.
To evolve into the greatest version of myself that I am right now.
I don't regret moments from my past anymore.
I thank them and I set them free.
I finally set myself free.
Take a long,
Slow,
Deep inhale here and exhale any remnants of regret left inside you.
And as you do,
The room completely dissolves and you find yourself standing back in the hallway again.
It's time to choose another door.
So try the key again with another door and feel it unlock easily.
And know that as you walk into this room,
You aren't the same person who began this journey with me.
You're now already stronger and freer.
When the door opens and you step inside,
This room feels warm.
Like honey.
But the walls in this room are lined with lots and lots of pages.
And on these pages is every unkind thing you have ever said to yourself.
This is the room that knows the way you speak to yourself when no one else is there.
The walls are lined with your words,
Your handwriting,
Pages everywhere.
Some are torn from your old diaries.
Some are horrible messages from your inner critic.
All are the silent conversations you've had inside your own mind for years.
Written here is every tone you've ever used against yourself.
Harsh.
Critical.
Judgmental.
Impatient.
Unkind.
Unforgiving.
Look around the room.
Feel it.
Feel how every page is waiting to be rewritten by you.
It's time to rewrite how you feel about yourself.
What you think about yourself.
Are you ready and willing to do that with me now?
If you are,
Then please,
As strange as it may sound,
Hold your own hand.
However you want,
However is comfortable,
Just make sure you're holding your own hand as you say these words to yourself now.
I am no longer available to be at war with myself.
As those words leave your lips,
The room immediately responds.
Some of the cruel words start to dissolve and fade.
So let's continue.
I refuse to be the place where I punish myself.
Watch how more of the writing begins to dissolve now.
The pages loosen.
The ink dissolving like smoke lifting into the air.
I refuse to be the voice that tears me down.
Whole sections of the walls are now beginning to clear.
All the harsh words are losing their grip and vanishing before your very eyes.
I have lived too long beneath the weight of my own unkindness.
Every page begins to empty,
Disappear,
Fade.
Everything you never meant to say to yourself over and over again is all disappearing.
This is no longer a room of criticism and belittlement.
You are turning it into a sanctuary with every word you say.
So let us continue.
I choose from this moment on to become a safe place for myself.
To become a loving voice inside myself.
I am done speaking to myself like I am the enemy.
And watch how now the whole room transforms.
Like the room's been washed clean by your own words.
By showing love to yourself.
Notice how the room is now painted in a pale colour of your choice.
A colour that feels the most delicious and comforting to your nervous system.
Feel your nervous system now completely safe and completely relaxed.
And as you do,
The room melts away.
And you find yourself back in the corridor once more.
Because there's just one more room to go.
So please,
Use the key and venture into the last room now.
This room is much darker.
At first it feels like stepping into pitch black.
But give your eyes a chance to adjust.
On the far wall,
There is a long mirror that hangs covered by a white sheet.
I'd like you to please step towards it and to pull the fabric away.
The reflection is dim at first,
Fogged by time.
But then it slowly clears and you see yourself.
And your first reaction is to clench your stomach.
To slightly tighten your shoulders.
To almost look away but you don't.
Because you remember you came here to stay with yourself.
So please,
Look directly into your own reflection.
Maybe for the very first time.
Don't judge yourself.
Don't critique anything about yourself.
Just accept yourself.
And as you do,
Please take the golden key that's still in your hand.
Raise the key up to your own chest and rest the key close to your heart.
And as you do,
A tiny door in your heart opens.
And you are flooded with the most delicious feeling of pure,
Unconditional love.
Take a long,
Slow,
Deep,
Delicious breath here and allow this unconditional love to soak every single part of you.
Whilst you look at your own reflection,
Feel the unconditional love.
Feel a release that fills physical,
Mental,
Emotional and spiritual.
Warmth and love floods through you.
And your reflection in the mirror illuminates.
Everything inside you feels different.
And for the first time in maybe forever,
You see yourself as you are right now.
Beautifully imperfect.
Constantly learning and growing and evolving.
But radiant in light.
Open to possibility.
Giving yourself the love you've always been worthy of.
The most important love.
Your own love.
And as you feel this,
Everything begins to dissolve into light.
The mirror dissolves into light.
The room dissolves into light.
And everything dissolves into light.
And you are part of that light.
So now please say to yourself,
With truth and power,
I forgive myself.
Say it again.
I forgive myself.
Own it one more time.
I forgive myself.
You're ready to start the next chapter of your existence.
So please slowly,
Lovingly and gently,
Feel yourself returning.
Slowly back into your body.
Your mind coming back online,
But this time with much more space,
Much more kindness for yourself and compassion for yourself.
And know that you were changed forever.
