Absence and presence are terms that are used a lot in meditation circles.
But what do they mean?
Let's explore both experientially as felt sense experiences.
Firstly,
Let's explore the felt experience of absence.
Take a moment to bring to mind something that's occupying a lot of your headspace at the moment.
Maybe a pressing deadline at work or a difficult conversation with someone.
Or maybe some worries about bills.
Nothing too major,
But something that draws your attention to it repeatedly.
Something that's been nagging away in the background.
Allow yourself to bring it fully into awareness now.
See the scene of it in your mind's eye.
Maybe replay some of the dialogue,
Either some of the real conversation or something you wish you had said.
Or something that you plan to say in the future.
And if it's a piece of work,
For example,
Really imagine yourself in front of the computer or on the phone or busily doing the task that needs doing.
Whatever that may be.
And when it feels fully vivid,
Fully here in awareness for you,
Let's switch our attention from the thought,
From the mental image to the actual sensation you're having right now.
And for me,
There's always an upwards and an outwards sensation.
I may feel strongly like I'm in my forehead or I'm in my eyes.
Or when I'm really lost in thought,
Lost in worrying or remembering or imagining the future,
I feel like I'm actually somewhere floating in a nebulous cloud,
Maybe in front or even slightly above my head.
My brow and my forehead is tense,
Knitted.
My eyes are tense.
My shoulders may be contracted,
Raised up slightly.
Or sometimes I feel tension elsewhere in my body.
And generally,
I often feel a lot of excitable,
Scratchy,
Caffeinated energy along the front of my body,
On the surface of the front of my body.
So just notice if any of that resonates for you now.
And let go of what you were thinking about and just sense the sensations.
You may also recognize there's an emotional tone that comes with those sensations.
Maybe some tension,
Some anxiety,
Some fear,
Some anger.
It feels a little bit like we stood up and we climbed out of our body to meet those challenges of our life.
The move is upwards and outwards.
This is the felt experience of absence.
When we're lost in the clouds of abstraction and concepts and thoughts.
When we're somehow ungrounded and no longer present in our bodies and therefore no longer very present to the world.
And most of us spend most of our lives somewhat absent.
And these sensations might feel so familiar to you that you can mistake them for your base state.
Well,
The good news is that this is not your natural base state.
So let's explore the opposite of absence.
Let's sit back together into presence.
Presence which is your natural resting state.
So the first part of this practice is simply to wake up,
To become aware.
Oh yeah,
I climbed up and out again.
I'm lost in thought again.
This needs to be done with kindness and with gentleness.
We all do it most of the time.
So don't make this about catching yourself out,
About castigating yourself.
This is a simple act of waking up and noticing.
Oh yeah,
Lost again.
And then sitting back down into your body and into presence.
It's important to know at this point that while you can think yourself into absence,
You can't think yourself into presence.
You need to feel your way back into presence.
And the sensations are all downwards and inwards.
So as soon as you notice,
Oh I'm lost,
I'm absent again,
Just pause.
Become still but not rigid.
Just give yourself permission to come into easeful stillness in the body.
Take a couple of slow conscious breaths,
Extending the exhale.
Now allow your forehead to relax,
Your eyes to relax.
Let your eyes be loose within their sockets.
Relax your focus and just breathe in and out,
Gently downwards.
From your head down into the trunk of your body.
Allow the out breath to soften your neck and your shoulders,
Your back,
Your solar plexus,
Your belly.
And feel yourself sitting back down into your body.
A couple more conscious breaths.
And with each breath just sit down further into your body.
Notice there's more space,
It feels less constricted.
There's more capacity to just be,
Rather than having to do or think.
And rest down even further into the back of your body,
To the back of your pelvis,
To the base of your spine.
And really take a seat in your body.
Take a seat in your inner,
Deeper knowing.
Sit back into presence.
Notice the openness,
The quiet,
The stillness of just being without an agenda,
Without any tight grip of control.
And from here,
Grounded and present in your body,
And as a consequence more available to others,
More available to the world,
You can return to your day.
And simply repeat this process whenever and wherever you wake up and notice your absence.
