How To Calm An Anxious Mind

If you struggle with anxiety,

This video is for you.

Whether you struggle with anxious thoughts.

Anxious sensations.

Anxious thoughts about anxious sensations,

That whole painful loop.

I want to share a little framework that I hope will be helpful.

Imagine a child who is scared.

And they have a parent who never learned how to deal with painful emotions.

So that parent scolds their child.

Maybe they say things like,

Again.

Or get over it,

Or.

.

.

People are struggling way worse than you.

Or they just judge that the child is feeling the way they're feeling.

Let's say there's another parent who just stays really busy and distracted and doesn't even really see that the child is struggling.

Maybe there's another parent who doesn't know what to do for their child.

It just feels over their head,

Out of their scope,

And they just have no idea what to do for their child's anxiety.

And maybe there's a parent who tries to fix their child.

Tell them.

Different ways that they could feel better immediately or just to be positive or give them advice really quickly.

And while many of these tactics can be well-meaning,

They're usually not effective.

And now let's say there's a parent who is really conscious,

Really loving.

They learned the importance of tending to emotions.

They've learned the importance of meeting emotions with compassion,

Welcoming them,

Giving them time,

Giving them soothing,

Giving them wisdom.

And saw this parent.

Goes to their child and says,

Tell me all about it.

And depending on the child's age,

Maybe they hold them or they rock them or they soothe them or they comfort them in some way with words or actions.

Maybe they teach them things.

Maybe they have a dialogue about whatever the child is scared about.

Maybe they reach out for support that feels really comforting.

So,

In case you haven't guessed where this is going.

You.

Your wise,

Compassionate self.

Can turn to the anxious sensations,

The anxious thoughts inside of you.

And meet them with compassion,

With tenderness,

With soothing,

With resources,

Just like a loving parent would treat their child.

I know that sometimes anxiety can just take over and we can get lost in the trance of it.

And I know that it's not a comfortable feeling,

So it's understandable to want it gone and to disapprove of it,

But that doesn't help.

Distracting,

Numbing,

Avoiding,

Scolding,

Judging,

Ignoring doesn't help.

What helps is turning to that anxious mind.

Turning to those anxious sensations and connecting with them like a loving,

Compassionate parent would connect with their child.

That's what helps.

If you'd like to join me,

I have anxiety relief courses.

I have a worry relief course.

I have lots of free meditations and tracks designed to help you talk to your worried mind.

You could look for titles in my menu of recordings that have the words monkey mind or worried mind or anxious mind or busy mind.

And those titles will help you learn specific ways to talk to the anxious mind to soothe it.

And in addition to my resources,

There's countless other resources out here in the world.

So I'm wishing you a compassionate,

Soothing relationship with anxiety.

And to meet your thoughts and feelings just the way a loving,

Tender parent would meet their child.

Thanks for joining me.