A Meditation To Get In Touch With Parts Triggered By Family

Are you curious about the seemingly contradictory parts inside of you? For example, how part of you may want to take a risk and try something new, while another part urges you to pull back, and stay safe? Throughout our lives we develop adaptations, or “parts” that help us survive, and which can also keep us from aligning with our deepest values and vision. Join me for this guided meditation to help you get in touch with the parts of you that get triggered by family.

Transcript

Time with family can be a joyous time, But it can also be anxiety provoking, Particularly around special events like the holidays. And so today I'm going to lead you in a meditation to help you get in touch with parts that arise inside in relationship to family. And so as we begin, I invite you to get yourself settled. It's good to sit in an upright way with your back straight if you can. Feet flat on the floor, With your legs uncrossed. If you feel comfortable, You can close your eyes. And if you'd rather have them open, Just let your gaze rest softly in front of you. Let your attention go inward. Get a sense of yourself and your body in space, Where you're sitting in the room. Feel your feet flat on the floor. And notice the points of contact where your body touches your chair, Your seat, Your back. Scan your body and notice any areas of tension, Relaxation, Resistance, Pain, Any sensations. You don't need to change anything. Just paying attention to whatever's going on in your body. And now let yourself just become aware of the sounds around you. Let the sense of sound fill your awareness. And now gently shift your awareness to your breath. Whether it's a breath or a breath, You can feel the sound of your breath. And now gently shift your awareness to your breath, Whether it's at the level of your nostrils, The air going in and out, Or the level of your chest as it goes up and down, Or the level of your abdomen going inward and outward. Perhaps you'll even just notice your whole body breathing. Wherever it comes most naturally, Just let your awareness ride the wave of your in-breath, And then your out-breath. And when you notice, As often happens, That your mind may have wondered and become lost in thought or a memory, A feeling, A worry. When you notice that, Just take note of it, And gently, Lovingly, Kindly, And without judgment, Return your awareness toward the breath. Wherever you feel it. And follow that wave of the in-breath and the out-breath. There's nothing to do. There's nowhere to go. Notice if there is any part of your body that is tight or uncomfortable, And breathe for a moment into that part of your body. Or adjust your position until that part's able to relax more and more. And as you're becoming more relaxed, Continue noticing the in-breath and the out-breath. Now I invite you to begin to think about your family. And those relationships. Maybe it's in the context of a family gathering, A holiday gathering. Maybe you're triggered by a particular family member. Maybe there's a mix of feelings. Some sadness, Some joy. Try to welcome all of the parts that are coming up. Let all of your parts know that there's no pressure. You just want to be with them. And continue to notice your breath in and out. You're not in a hurry. Just curious about what you'll discover as you engage your parts. Take a minute to notice and to check in with your inner world. It might be helpful to imagine that you're approaching a table. Maybe it's the same table that your family members have gathered around. Invite all of your parts that are arising, Your inner committee members. All of the different voices that live inside of you to the table. Let them know that they're all welcome. Notice how your parts are responding. Maybe some want to keep some distance from the table. Let them know that it's okay. Notice how you're feeling about this gathering at the table and how you're feeling toward your parts. Are you curious? Are you a little nervous or afraid? Remember that this is a perfectly safe place and that you are the one in charge of your inner journey. It's your journey and yours alone. Now when you're ready, I want you to approach the table. Slowly or quickly, It's up to you. Pause when you reach your seat. Pull out your chair and sit down. Invite your parts, Your inner committee, Who would like to, To also take a seat. Slowly look around the table at each part. Who do you see there? Some parts may be smiling and waving to you. Some might be just sitting there quietly. Some might be yelling and arguing to get your attention. Some parts might be wearing masks or they may be completely covered up and standing at a distance in the room because they don't want you to know them yet. Notice again how you're feeling about this gathering and toward your parts. Are you nervous? Glad? Curious? Interested? Scared? Just notice how you feel. Toward the situation and toward your parts. Remember that you are in charge. Whatever you're feeling is okay. Each of these parts sitting at the table represents a part of yourself. And each one carries a special gift for you. They're each there to teach you something about yourself and your world. It's only your job to watch and listen and be curious. Try to get a sense of which part you notice the most right now. Who wants your attention most right now? And maybe ask, Does anyone have anything to say to me right now? Or who wants my attention right now? Then sit back and watch what happens. Allow one of your committee members to come forward. It might take a while or someone might begin eagerly sharing. Whatever happens is okay. Check in and notice the part that you're sensing the most right now. Where do you sense it? In or around your body? Or maybe there's a color or an image. Are you curious? If there's some resistance. If there's resistance, Just pause and ask the part what it wants you to know. As you're observing, Spend a few minutes talking with this part of you that so graciously steps forward. Ask it what it wants to say. Ask it if it brings you a gift. Ask it if it needs anything from you right now. And then just listen. Just continue to be curious and compassionate toward this part if you can. You don't need to do anything except observe and listen and be. Ask the part if there's anything else it needs or wants to share. Is there anything else that you want to say to or share with the part? Think the part for its courage in coming forward. Ask if it'd like to spend more time with you in the future. If it does, Let it know that you like that and let it know when you will make time for it. Now slowly glance around the table and room. Thank all of your parts for witnessing you engaging with this part today. Even those who may be keeping their distance, Let them know that they can have some time with you in the future. If they'd like to. And now slowly get up and leave the table. Take your time and there's no pressure. Gently bring your attention back to your breath, Noticing the in breath. And the out breath. Bring your awareness to the sounds around you. Notice your body in your chair, Your feet on the floor. When you feel ready, You can gently open your eyes if they were closed. And it may be helpful to spend a few minutes writing notes or journaling or drawing what this experience was like for you. But thank you for joining me in this meditation today. Take care.