Welcome,
My beautiful dreamer.
To begin this inner healing journey,
Please make sure you're as comfortable as you possibly can be.
Please now show yourself some real love and kindness by getting as comfy and cosy with yourself as you possibly can,
Because this is your time,
All and only for you and your inner healing.
This is your time to do the inner work needed in order to become the greatest version of yourself and create the life you really long for,
Just the way I have.
If your eyes aren't closed,
Then I invite you to close them now,
Because it's time to venture inside yourself.
It's time to delve into your own inner world.
To begin,
Just focus on your breath.
I just want you to focus all of your attention on the breath that gives you life.
Deep breaths in through your nose and long exhales out your mouth.
Your inhales gather up anything inside you that you don't need,
And your exhales let it all go with long sighs of relief.
Feel yourself making space inside yourself,
So you can delve deeper into the truth of you,
Into your inner being.
Simply by using the power of your own breath,
You're bringing yourself deeper and deeper into you.
I spent my whole life feeling ashamed of myself.
I was ashamed about everything I was,
And I felt that way from a very,
Very young age.
I don't blame anyone anymore,
And I don't live in that shame anymore,
But I tell you because I know what it's like to live there.
I know what it feels like to be imprisoned in the pain of shame,
Because it governed most of my own existence.
And from my experience of this emotion,
I believe it to be one of the most uncomfortable,
Excruciating and painful emotions of them all.
Shame drowns you,
It pulls you under,
It holds you down.
Shame suffocates you,
It wraps itself around your soul and tightens every time you try to escape it.
I truly believe that shame is one of the most paralyzing,
Life-screwing emotions that human beings have to endure.
Because shame doesn't just visit your thoughts,
It infiltrates your body,
Seeps into your bones,
Curls itself into your stomach and coils itself around your spine until you're hardly really living at all.
And because it's such a painful emotion,
We avoid feeling it.
We do anything and everything to avoid it.
We numb ourselves from it,
In a variety of ways,
Over-eating,
Over-exercising,
Over-thinking,
Over-drinking,
Mindlessly swiping or scrolling.
We distract ourselves from the uncomfortable emotions in any way we can,
And we don't even know that we're doing it.
We bury our shame in the deepest,
Darkest parts of ourselves and hope that it will eventually just go away.
But that's not how it works,
I'm afraid.
That's just not how human emotions work.
Painful emotions like shame don't disappear because you ignore them.
They fester and grow and infiltrate your whole entire inner being.
And it affects your whole entire life.
It starts living in your body,
In your reactions,
Your relationships,
Your choices,
The way you see yourself and what you believe you deserve.
Repressed shame can come out as defensiveness,
Because deep down you already feel wrong.
Repressed shame can come out as overreaction,
Because you're not just reacting to what's old pain inside you.
That old shame can make you feel like there's something innately wrong with you.
It can come out as people-pleasing,
Always saying yes even when you want to say no,
Because the shame convinces you that your needs aren't important,
That you're the least important.
Repressed shame can come out as you accepting the scraps,
The crumbs,
Bare minimum love,
Half-hearted effort,
Because the shame tells you you should be grateful for what you've got.
And one of the worst things about repressed shame is it can cause you to hide your real self.
Your truth,
Your feelings,
Your needs.
Your voice,
Your joy,
Your mess,
Your brightness.
Because that old shame tells you that if people really see you,
Then they won't stick around.
This is why shame is so powerful.
Because you're not just feeling bad,
You're living from the belief that you are bad.
And when you believe that you are bad,
It means you tolerate things you were never meant to tolerate.
You apologize for being yourself.
You chase love that causes you harm.
You shrink around people who don't even deserve to be near you.
Do you see how the shame does not disappear just because you don't want to feel it?
It waits,
It festers,
It poisons you from the inside out.
I'm not telling you this to scare you,
I'm telling you this so you can save yourself right now.
Right now with me,
Because you really are that powerful.
You just don't believe it.
But by daring to face the emotion of shame with me now,
You can experience shame in a brand new way that will change your life.
What's the alternative?
You could continue letting it sit quietly inside you.
Like toxic smoke trapped in a sealed room,
But the longer it stays there,
The more it messes up your inner world.
Depression,
Anxiety,
Constant fatigue,
Sleepless nights,
Back pain.
A constant racing mind that never stops,
A body that always carries aches and pains no matter what you do or what you try.
What if all those symptoms of dis-ease are really just the accumulation of the old emotions you never dared to feel?
Now is the time to give the old shame permission to move through you.
Instead of forcing it to stay inside you and harming yourself deeply in the process.
Now I want you to listen to me very carefully.
I'm not asking you to revisit any painful memories from the past.
You don't need to go back there.
You don't need to go back there in order to free yourself from shame.
You do not have to relive the past in order to heal your present.
You just need to be willing to do the inner work now.
Because you don't have to go back there.
You don't have to go back to any of it.
The past no longer exists.
This moment is all we have.
So please stay here.
In this exact moment with me and nowhere else.
Because this is your moment to set yourself free.
Take a long,
Slow,
Deep breath here.
And let's begin.
I'd like you now to tune into the feeling of shame in your body.
Let the emotion rise from within your dark places now.
I want you to connect to what shame feels like in your inner being.
This has nothing to do with your head.
You can't feel the emotion of shame from your mind.
Emotion is sensation in your body.
Not the thoughts and stories you attach to those sensations.
So please stay with yourself now from the neck down.
Feelings and sensations only.
When you feel shame inside you,
What does it feel like?
Where does it live inside of you?
Maybe your shame feels like sludge,
Thick and sticky,
Stuck to the inside of you.
Or maybe your shame feels more like fire burning you from the inside out.
Maybe it's a hollow,
Empty void that could swallow you whole at any time.
However it feels for you,
Just notice it.
Just be with it.
Don't try and change it.
Just observe the sensations,
Just feel.
Remember,
Only from the neck down.
Please don't attach a story or the past to the sensations.
Your shame doesn't live in the stories your mind tells you.
It lives inside your body and it will stay there until you choose to let it go.
Just feel the shame in your body,
Acknowledge it's there,
That's all you have to do.
And now my next request is a slightly strange one.
I'd like you now to go back to the very first moment you were born into this world.
I want you to remember the essence of who you were as you entered this world.
Because at that very moment you were completely brand new.
You were wide,
Open and free.
Your beautifully intricate nervous system was wired perfectly and safely.
You weren't born judging yourself and judging other people.
You weren't born noticing the differences.
You were born to experience the beauty of a human existence fully and completely.
You were not born competing,
Comparing,
Forcing or doing.
You were born a pure,
Innocent being.
You were born as pure presence.
Pure life.
Pure emotion,
Pure connection to all that is.
You were born with imagination,
Intuition,
Safety,
Instinct,
Trust,
Curiosity,
Play.
You came into this world hungry for life,
Hungry for connection,
Hungry for expression.
Hungry to feel and live and experience absolutely everything.
Including your shame.
That's who you were before the world told you that you were anything else.
So now I want you to reconnect to the essence of you.
To the immense power,
Beauty and magnificence of your own essence.
Who you have always been.
And this is how you do it.
Keeping your eyes closed,
Bring your hands together in front of you in the prayer position.
And just start gently rubbing your hands together now.
Slowly.
Starting to build a heat between your hands.
Gradually building momentum.
Do it consciously and deliberately.
Like you're generating the healing energy of your own soul.
Feel the friction and heat building between your hands now.
Feel the subtle vibration that's starting to awaken.
Keep rubbing your hands together a little bit longer.
Building that inner electricity until your palms feel alive with it.
A little bit faster.
Just a little bit faster.
And now stop.
Keep your hands together.
And just feel the energy you just created.
Now gently separate your hands just a little tiny bit and feel the electricity that surges between them.
Feel the power of your own energy between your hands now.
This my beautiful dreamer is your own energetic life force.
So now I want you to place your hands upon your own body wherever the shame lives inside you.
I want you to place your healing hands on your own beautiful body on all the places where shame has been hiding.
Imagine your hands have become powerful energetic magnets.
Magnets that can pull out all of your old repressed shame.
Feel the energy you created in your hands drawing out all that toxic shame energy now.
Now I'd like you to raise your hands in front of you,
Palms facing upward.
And I want you to feel the energy of all your old shame gathered there in the palms of your hands.
Feel the energy of all the shame you've been carrying your whole life but never dared to express.
It's time to let it all go now.
It's time to set yourself free.
And to do that is easy.
Because all you have to do is clap your hands once as hard as you can.
Deliberately,
Intentionally,
Knowing that by doing so you're energetically cleansing yourself of all and any shame you've been carrying.
Maybe you've been carrying for a very,
Very long time.
It's time to release yourself from all of it.
With one powerful,
Decisive clap.
Please believe you are this powerful,
My beautiful dreamer.
Remember that your soul is infinite and connected to all that is.
That power of all that is lives inside you.
You are pure life force.
So get ready.
After three.
Three.
You're going to release all of that shame forever.
One.
Two.
Three.
Clap.
And as your palms touch,
All that shame energy explodes into bright,
Pure,
Beautiful light.
And just like that,
It's gone.
I want you to feel how it is to be free of shame inside you now.
Feel the unfamiliar lightness within you now.
A feeling of wide,
Open space and inner freedom.
A delicious,
Wide,
Open space inside yourself.
Because all the old shame is gone.
And in this moment,
You remember the purity and power of who you are.
You remember the light you came into this world with.
The light that still shines inside you.
It's safe now.
It's time to let your light shine now.
To be fully yourself without apology,
Without explanation,
And without dragging the past wherever you go.
Before we end this inner adventure together,
I need to be honest with you.
Because shame will probably come and visit you again.
It's supposed to.
Shame is part of our human experience.
You see,
The truth is we were given the emotion of shame to feel,
To learn,
To grow and to evolve.
It's actually always only been here to teach you.
So I want to explain something very important to you now.
There are two kinds of shame.
There's the clean,
Healthy,
Learning and growing shame.
And then there's the sticky,
Past,
Toxic,
Programmed shame.
Clean shame is the shame that comes with a lesson.
It visits you to help you grow and evolve into an even more magnificent version of you.
Clean shame doesn't tell you that you're wrong or bad or broken.
It just tells you that you're capable of choosing differently.
Clean shame brings you back to the purest part of yourself.
Sticky shame,
On the other hand,
Is the shame you inherited and learned along the way.
It's the shame that got created through fear,
Judgment,
Control,
Rejection,
Abandonment.
The shame that was taught to you by family systems,
Education,
Society.
Sticky shame is the shame that tells you you're wrong and bad and should be ashamed of yourself.
Sticky shame is not real.
It's not now.
It's from a past that no longer exists.
So from now on,
My darling,
When you feel shame in your body,
Stay with it from the neck down and ask yourself,
Is this clean shame trying to teach me something?
Or is this sticky shame that I don't need to listen to anymore?
If it's clean shame,
Then pay attention to it.
Feel the feeling,
Learn the lesson,
And then let the feeling leave and let yourself grow.
But if it's sticky shame,
Then come back to this practice of tuning into yourself and rubbing your hands together to generate your own powerful healing energy and pull that sticky shame out of you again.
You can set yourself free again and again and again.
And now slowly,
Return to the here and now,
Back to your connection to the outside world.
Carrying this newfound relationship with shame,
Clear of any old shame that used to live inside you,
And now understanding the difference between clean and sticky shame.
And when you're ready,
Open your eyes.
