The Morning Shadows.
Getting longer.
The leaves are beginning to rust.
And my heart begins to open again.
Open from.
DRY and deserted place.
I welcome.
Everything in.
Into this world.
Inside me.
Into this.
Ageing body.
If it's here.
It's meant for me.
Everything has its place.
Listened to.
Everything has a duty.
And my responsibility is to.
.
.
Be here for it all.
To witness it.
To feel it,
To process it.
Without identifying with any of it.
As me.
There's the beautiful sound of birdsong.
And over that.
Is punctuated.
The sound of industry.
The ugly sounds of machinery.
The man made with the natural.
Beautiful with the ugly.
Is somehow.
It all fits.
After months of desert-like conditions,
There's dew on the grass again.
Sparkling.
Mystic.
Autumn Morning Air I soften into this moment and I invite you too to Suffern with me.
To live in your body for a while.
To drop thinking from the head down into the heart.
Spreading into the abdomen.
Through the limbs.
Feeling.
Peace.
Physically.
We're not making plans,
Son.
Being peaceful.
Or finding stillness.
Because peace can only be found here in the present moment and That can't be planned.
Plans are always about.
Tomorrow.
I'm asking you to be here now.
To feel the pain.
The pleasure.
And the neutral.
It all counts.
Welcome it all in.
It all has something to teach you.
If it's here,
It's meant for you.
And that is impossible.
For our egoic selves to understand.
But if we trust that and believe it.
.
.
Trust in life,
The process of its unfolding.
Then we become free.
Because a new dimension of wisdom opens within us and it sees that None of it's really me.
I don't need to own it.
And it's a constant process of change.
And that change.
Is life itself.
Are we so long to be out of the darkness and into the light?
I did this myself.
When this process of spiritual awakening began.
I went crazy in a strange way,
Filled with joy but also despair.
It was like everything magnified.
And I saw meditation.
As an escape hatch.
And I climbed through that escape hatch.
Because all I wanted was the peace and the joy.
The darkness isn't welcome.
So I sat for hours and hours a day.
On average four hours meditation every day.
And crazy things happen.
So I climbed through that escape hatch of meditation.
And my world did fill with light.
But my eyes couldn't take it.
I was blinded by it.
I was seeing things I didn't want to see.
I was awakened.
And that light became unbearable.
And all I wanted to do was go back.
Into the darkness,
The ignorance to close my eyes.
To even things out again.
But once your eyes have been opened and you've seen certain truths,
You can't unsee them.
So you walk for a while.
In this new light.
Dazzle.
Trying to make a go of the world.
But you can't.
Something strange has happened and The ego that once was,
That pushed you to work.
That made you aspire.
It vanishes to a large degree.
You're in a world where.
.
.
You don't have the motivation that others do because you've seen through it all.
So you walk about.
Dazzled in this.
Overwhelming light.
For me for many years.
I would say a decade.
And slowly your eyes become accustomed to it.
You learn to live in this world.
And not be of this world.
Just as Jesus said.
That's so hard to do.
But once you do,
Once you manage that.
.
.
Your whole being is filled with light.
There's no rushing it.
It's a natural process.
That just has to happen.
You wondering what that sound is or what I'm doing.
I'll show you.
This little pain is crying for attention.
Say hello.
And he's still crying for attention.
So I'm not going to cut or edit that out He's even ragging at my sleeve now,
He's our new puppy.
Once you've started meditation,
There's no going back.
And for a while.
.
.
You wish you'd never started.
Once you're over that.
My goodness!
You understand what life's all about.
Why you're here.
And now nothing.
Can ever hurt you.
I'm gonna have to go now.
Because I'm being savaged by this beast.
Peace.
