Today,
To be honest,
The first part of the day,
My mind was kind of busy too,
And then somatic practices really helped.
I hope this session will be helpful for you too.
First of all,
We start with giving permission to ourselves to just be as we are.
If we're feeling anxious,
Letting ourselves heal this feeling.
If we are worried,
Giving ourselves permission to feel these feelings.
Why is this important?
Because,
For example,
If we're feeling anxious,
And we are then worrying about feeling anxious,
Or we put resistance,
We should not feel anxious,
Because what it does is that it creates more anxiety.
So now,
Not only we are anxious because of whatever thing that triggered this feeling,
But we are even more anxious because we are not supposed to be anxious.
To me,
That is the first thing that helps.
Not judging myself for feeling anxious or being worried,
Because in itself,
Anxiety or worry is a form of protection.
So,
This sense of trying to control things,
Even when it is not conscious,
Even when we think too much about the future,
Or we think a lot about the future,
And we are in the present.
And oftentimes what happens is that that future does not unfold as we thought about it.
I hear this a lot,
That plans often do not go as they were planned,
Because things happen.
But even though we know this,
Oftentimes we still try to control what is in the future.
Because this gives us a sense of control.
If we're planning a lot,
Or trying to keep everything perfectly in order,
Gives us a sense of control about what is to come.
Even though we have no control.
It's not that we have no control about it,
But we don't have this much control that we try to have.
Of course that we have a sort of control,
But there are a lot of things that are out of our control as well.
What I find helpful when my mind is really busy,
And I'm thinking a lot,
Is awareness of the breath.
Even counting breaths,
Or even without counting,
Just bringing the awareness to the breath.
And then feeling the body.
It doesn't have to be a formal meditation,
Like sitting and doing it as a meditation,
Even though it could be helpful if you could do that.
And in other cases,
It could be helpful to just be,
And not do the traditional way of meditating.
Even going out and noticing the environment,
Feeling the sensations in your body.
What are you feeling?
Where are you feeling it?
Is it in your shoulders?
In your jaw?
The tongue?
In the ceiling of the mouth?
In the muscles of the feet?
Just noticing the sensations.
What also helps to me is,
What am I projecting?
Where?
Where does this come from?
Because oftentimes,
It can happen that this thing comes from an earlier experience.
For example,
If the parent was critical,
Like too critical,
And it creates this sense of anxiety,
And the inner critic is too loud,
Or so loud,
It feels like it is present,
Like it is happening now.
The body experiences it as it is happening now.
But in reality,
That is a projection,
That is a part of yourself that is holding the criticism,
Or that is holding this sense of control,
And the awareness,
Understanding that this is just a part of you,
This is something that maybe at a time it served you,
But now at this moment,
It can be making things worse.
So mindful breathing,
And somatic sensations,
Noticing your feelings in a somatic level,
That can be really helpful to ground in this moment.
And at the same time,
It can be helpful to connect with the self.
What I find also helpful when the mind is really busy,
Is noticing the surroundings.
For example,
If I can,
I'd go on a date with myself,
And in the less times that I've done this,
I just sat outside,
Near the street,
And just noticing people.
And I love this because it creates a sense of compassion within me,
And a curiosity,
Like the beginner's mind,
Because I am really interested to understand people.
But what helps,
Like beside this,
What helps is bringing the awareness to your surroundings.
If you are inside,
Just notice the place you are in.
For example,
The phone on the table,
The paper,
You know,
Just bringing the awareness to the surroundings,
And seeing details.
It soothes the body,
But at the same time,
It is a way of grounding yourself in this moment,
And it actually helps.
The non-judgmental observation of the self,
And of others.
And it can help they're connected with one another.
It can help noticing others in a non-judgmental way,
And then this mirrors back to yourself.
Or,
Noticing yourself,
Letting yourself be,
And then mirroring it to others.
It comes naturally,
Because it is connected.
Oftentimes,
It can help to just observe others,
Or observe life,
Or the flow of life.
And then,
As you practice this non-judgmental observation,
To the life,
To others,
It comes more naturally to practice it to yourself.
A very important thing that is connected with the non-judgmental observation,
Especially when it comes to life,
Is acceptance.
Like,
Full acceptance,
Radical acceptance.
Because if we try to control,
There is the sense of resistance.
And this resistance,
It has emotional weight.
And what it does,
Like,
Something did not go as we expected,
Something did not go as we planned,
Things that were out of our control happened in a way that we would not like,
Or relationships not turning out the way that we'd like them to be.
There is a part of us that still holds this resistance,
That does not want to accept things as they turned out.
But the truth is,
Unless we fully accept life as it is,
Unless we are present with this acceptance,
We cannot act on the reality.
So,
This sense of acceptance helps us,
First of all,
With emotional processing,
In order for us to,
I'd put it this way,
The resistance in itself has emotional weight.
When we accept,
We move past the resistance,
And we let this weight go.
And as we do this,
This acceptance,
Let us act,
And we get better outcomes,
Even though sometimes it may take more time to get this better outcome.
And at the same time,
As this emotional weight eases,
Becomes less,
We are more at peace with ourself and the reality,
And we see things in a more rooted,
In a more grounded way,
And therefore making more grounded decisions.
The other thing that comes with acceptance and the resistance is letting go.
Because,
And this is one fear,
Like a fear that feeds or goes along with the resistance,
Because when we accept something we don't like,
Then we are given the choice to either accept it and get along with it,
Or accept it and let it go,
Even put boundaries or take actions.
And this fear of letting go,
It empowers or it feeds in a way the resistance.
And when we accept,
And we are given this choice of letting go,
Or like this choice of getting along with it or letting go,
Releasing this attachment to what doesn't serve us,
And at the same time,
Beside this situation,
Just when we come back to this moment,
Letting go of the attachments to the future,
Letting go of our expectations,
Like doing the best for now,
And letting go of what we expect things to be.
Because when you do your best,
You are still at peace with yourself,
That okay,
You did your best,
And yet the mind keeps us busy,
Because the mind tries to protect us and to keep us safe.
So,
Practicing this sense of stillness.
Stillness as a word can feel challenging,
But just presence.
And I'd love to think it as a gift to yourself.
So,
If we go back to the idea of being your best friend,
Like I love myself enough,
And I deserve my own presence.
I love myself enough to be present with myself.
And then noticing the sensations in your body,
And giving yourself permission to be.
Because the things that you can't control,
You are doing your best to bring up the best of the results.
The things that you cannot control are out of your control anyway.
So,
You can as well give yourself this blessing of being on your side,
As you move along,
As you move through this difficult time,
Or this challenge that you may be facing right now.
Gratitude is also helpful,
Because when we go through challenging times,
We tend to forget what good is in our lives.
But gratitude,
Not in a forced gratitude,
More as a way of observation,
As a form of observation.
So,
Just noticing yourself,
The sensations in your body,
Feeling yourself,
Feeling your body.
And I think,
Instead of the gratitude,
What could help is,
Like,
Gratitude is awesome,
But in the moments that gratitude may feel challenging,
What could help is bringing the awareness in your heart,
And connecting with your heart.
And feeling,
Or imagining,
If feeling feels challenging.
The light in your heart expanding,
And as you imagine and visualize,
Try connecting with the feelings of it.
How does it feel when you bring the awareness in your heart?
How does it feel when the source of energy in your heart expands,
And is so present with you,
And has so much love for you?
Notice the feelings and the sensations,
And let yourself feel them.
And then notice the connection with similar hearts,
With hearts that hold the same frequency.
And it all comes together to the intentional leaving,
To living with intention.
All of this,
This awareness,
This mindfulness,
This presence,
All of it comes to being present with yourself,
Comes back to integrating all of this into your everyday life,
Into moment-to-moment awareness,
Into doing your life,
Doing everyday activities with this new sense of awareness.
And even formal meditation helps a lot with this,
Because as you practice being present with yourself,
As you practice connecting with yourself,
As you practice the non-judgmental observation,
When you deal with life,
When you deal with challenges,
When you deal with everything around you,
This practice,
This daily practice has changed something in you,
Has brought a sense of calmness or resilience,
Because every day you're sitting with yourself,
And you notice your thoughts,
And you notice your emotions,
And you know that they will pass,
And you know that everything that is present now will pass.
So what happens is that as you deal with challenges,
As you deal with difficult situations,
This mindset,
This inner shift that has happened as you sit with your thoughts and feelings in meditation,
Even without understanding or unconsciously,
Because you have been practicing it so much that now it is an unconscious behavior,
It comes with you during these challenging times,
It is present with you during these challenging times.
And that is really beautiful.
And it also is something that comes with us not only in the challenging times,
But also in the times of the everyday life.
It comes with us as we go to work,
As we leave daily,
As we do our daily activities.
So this sense of resilience that is created through practice of meditation,
Through the formal practice of meditation,
As we sit with ourselves and with our thoughts and with the feelings that arise,
As we do this,
We understand that everything passes.
We understand that whatever comes our way will pass too.
And we carry this mentality,
We have this new mentality,
And it is more than a mentality,
It is an unconscious way of living now.
Because as you sit with these uncomfortable feelings and emotions and thoughts,
It is not just a thought process,
It is inner work,
It is somatic,
It is something that your body experiences.
And it comes very naturally to take this with you as you go through work,
As you deal with different aspects of your life,
And even in challenging times.
So oftentimes it is not stillness what we need,
It is just presence,
Just being with yourself,
Just being present with those feelings and thoughts.
And offering yourself some compassion as you're going through this difficult time,
And offering yourself some compassion and care and love,
But just as much or as little as you can as you're going through this difficult time.
