Today I want to talk about anger because I keep seeing quotes on the internet such as if you feel anger be quiet,
Let go of anger,
Anger doesn't solve anything,
It builds nothing but it can destroy everything.
People keep posting these things over and over and over and over again.
It feels like virtue signalling.
If you don't know what virtue signalling is,
It's people,
Especially on social media,
Trying to appear like good people.
We don't need to show desperately that we are good people if we truly believe that we are good people.
That's an entirely different subject.
I want to talk about anger because anger is such a healthy emotion.
Before I continue,
I want to explain the difference between anger and rage.
Anger is something incredibly healthy if you don't allow it to run away with itself.
Anger is actually a feeling that can enhance your emotional intelligence.
That's right,
You can use it as a flag,
It can highlight an injustice,
It can motivate you to change something about a certain situation.
Because it can feel so uncomfortable,
It can also encourage you to dig a little bit deeper.
It makes you reflect.
Again,
I'm not talking about rage.
Rage is this blind,
Beyond language,
Primal feeling where you lose control and you see red.
Anger is a human emotion.
It can protect you,
It can protect your values and your beliefs.
It makes you stand up for what's important to you.
It sets a boundary if you see somebody trying to take advantage of you.
It makes us more optimistic about change.
It helps us process grief.
Anger is part of healthy grieving when we go through the different stages of grief.
We can solve problems with anger.
You might be thinking,
How can that be?
Because when I'm angry I can't think clearly.
But you can actually learn to use anger as your friend.
Not display it in a really unhealthy way.
Not shout and yell at people.
But I think sometimes it's okay to snap.
Because we need to set boundaries if they are overstepped over and over and over.
Feeling angry can also give you a sense of control.
You feel helpless and anger comes in.
You stand up,
Right?
You stand up for yourself.
So anger really is not something negative.
And actually if somebody tells you not to feel angry or to let go of anger,
It's actually gaslighting.
And there are some human emotions that people are being shamed for.
But guess what?
You are a human being like everyone else and you have a right to feel the full spectrum of emotion.
We are being told by maybe our parents,
By society,
By the culture we grew up in,
Maybe religion,
What is right and what is wrong.
And anger is one of those things that people are being shamed for.
So I want to encourage you to reflect on your own anger and get in touch with it.
Think about the last time you felt angry and maybe write down how it served you and how it didn't serve you and how next time you would like to act differently but still allowing yourself to feel angry.
So no more emotional bypassing.
