Compassion & Loving-kindness At Love Yourself Chiropractic
This now edited recording from the January 4, 2023, guided meditation on the Sublime Abidings of compassion and loving-kindness (via Insight Timer live and) from new location Love Yourself Chiropractic in Wentzville, Missouri, started with a brief instructional talk. [The audio needed noise reduction and does not include real-life discussion nor the five simple Qi breathing exercises.]
Transcript
Hold this welcome.
This is Josh DeBold of integratingpresence.
Com.
What I plan to do is breathe into our heart center,
Whether we consider that our physical heart,
Just the feelings we have around that area,
Energy,
It could be really close,
However you want to do it.
And I also wanted to preface this with,
If you've never done anything like this,
You can't mess it up.
And you're welcome to just listen to my words and do your own thing too.
And I encourage people to find out what works best for them.
We'll breathe in another heart,
We can stay with that the entire time.
But for the compassion practice,
What we'll do is we won't pick the most challenging person in our life,
Our situation in our life.
We'll pick one where it's,
You know,
One where we wish we could have shown a little bit more compassion to someone and ourselves as well.
We'll bring them to mind.
I'll give some phrases and then we tune in to how we feel when we're doing that.
So we'll do compassion for them and we'll do compassion for us too,
With these phrases.
And then once we do that,
We'll switch to loving kindness.
And so this is a word,
It's a meta.
It's translated as loving kindness,
But it can also mean like unstoppable friendliness and wishing well,
Goodness,
Well-being.
So basically,
As long as we have the absence of ill will,
We're being lovingly kind.
That's the baseline.
So that's,
You know,
Just an absence of ill will.
Traditionally,
We do it for beings.
So we'll start off with someone who's really easy to show love towards,
Like the dog,
Right?
Because there's no complicated thing.
Just love flows easily.
Bring that image to mind and then we feel into it.
And then I'll say these phrases and you're welcome to just listen to the phrases,
Repeat them with me silently,
Or use your own phrases too.
Then we'll go towards ourselves more than likely.
Ourselves,
We'll practice for ourselves.
And then we'll have a neutral person,
What's called a neutral person.
And that's someone like we pass in the street,
We don't know who they are,
Right?
Maybe a clerk or something.
And we'll do that practice for them.
And then I invite you guys to do a challenging person.
Maybe some people might consider this if we have an enemy or something like that.
Maybe we're their challenging person too,
Right?
And then maybe towards the end,
We'll do for all beings everywhere.
And then we'll,
If I remember,
We'll invite us to share any benefit we had with our loved ones too,
And whoever else we would like to share the benefit of this with.
So one of the things I didn't mention when we first started is that whatever happens,
It's supposed to happen.
Because things can happen from the exact opposite coming up that we want to happen.
So that's okay.
And then all the way to expanded states,
Because these are also known as limitless states,
Boundless states.
So we can have like rapturous and bliss,
Those things can arise too.
And just notice that.
And if anything would happen to get too intense or something,
We can easily open our eyes,
Go back to however we were.
Now that we're with our breath here,
Let's continue doing that into our heart.
Locate however you want to pay attention to your heart,
Whether it be the physical heart,
The energetic heart,
Just that area.
It could be very small,
Expanded.
You can try different things,
But just know we're breathing in and out of the heart area.
It could be emotions,
Feelings,
Whatever you feel drawn to,
Breathe in and out of.
And we'll do that for just some time before we start the formal compassion and then loving kindness practices.
Okay.
Notice the feelings or the breath there.
It could be the movement.
You can also see the movement with your mind's eye,
However you feel drawn to pay attention there.
Ideally with the breath.
Often notice a slight rising on the in-breath,
A slight falling on the out-breath.
Also welcome to put a hand there on your heart or two hands even.
It makes it easier.
Other experiences might come into our heart and mind here,
And that's okay.
We just,
We notice that we just return the attention to breathing in and out of the heart,
However we've chosen to pay attention there.
And take a moment to tune into what feels even more relaxing around paying attention here.
Maybe there can be a softening,
A release,
A melting,
Relaxing,
Inviting ease and comfort there.
Okay.
So now let's turn to our compassion practice.
So I'll just say the phrases I'm going to use up front,
And then I'll talk a little more not too much hopefully.
So the phrases I'll use is,
I acknowledge your pain,
And I care about your pain to the best that I'm able to now.
May your pain release,
And may you know peace.
So you don't have to remember those.
I will say those.
And you're all also welcome to use your own phrases for compassion.
And so we're doing this for beings,
Living beings.
And so I invite you to recall a time,
Spend a moment recalling a time,
Maybe not your most challenging time in your life,
But ideally some maybe some time from the near future where you had a wish that you could be more compassionate to another and yourself.
So it could be with friends,
Family,
It could be with a stranger,
It could be a chance,
A random,
Seemingly random interaction.
So whenever it comes to mind that's not too challenging,
And then we,
And ideally it's just towards one being at first here,
So it's simpler.
And then bring that image to the mind's eye,
Recall that image as best as you're able to,
And just kind of feel into this compassionate wish that we have for the other person and then to ourselves next.
And I'll just repeat these phrases.
I acknowledge your pain,
And I care about your pain to the best I'm able to now.
May your pain release,
And may you know peace.
I'll just do this a few times here.
I acknowledge your pain,
And care about your pain.
May your pain release,
May you know peace.
I acknowledge,
I see and acknowledge your pain,
And care about your pain the best I'm able to.
May your pain release,
And may you know peace.
Tuning into how this feels in the heart center,
The heart area,
Again with their image in mind one more time.
I acknowledge your pain,
And I care about your pain.
May your pain release,
May you know peace.
And now for ourselves,
We can again recall that situation,
Or even if it's not a situation,
Even if it's just in general,
When we do another person too with this,
That's okay.
So,
Or even if ourself we can't recall a situation,
We can just in general practice this for the inevitable pains of being human,
Right?
We don't take on a human life without experiencing some kind of pain at some time or another.
I acknowledge this pain,
And I care about this pain to the amount and ability that I'm able to now.
May this pain release,
May I know peace.
I acknowledge this pain,
And I care about this pain.
May this pain release,
May I know peace.
Again,
I acknowledge this pain,
And care to the best of my ability about this pain.
May it release,
May I know peace.
Let's just spend a few moments in silence,
And allowing you all to do for a few moments,
Either yourself,
Another,
Even another situation if you'd like.
And you don't even have to do the phrases,
You don't have to be exact,
However you'd like to do this for a few moments.
It seems many times that folks,
Or when folks act out,
They're wanting their pain acknowledged.
And when we realize we can acknowledge our own pain,
It's very helpful.
Simple acknowledgement.
The thing of compassion and action,
I find that just offering is,
How can I help?
Is there anything I can do?
A lot of times just saying that,
Offering that to folks,
Is a real helpful.
Doesn't mean we have to follow through on what they ask of us either.
I feel that's compassion and action as well.
Okay,
So now let's transition to loving kindness.
So loving kindness is an unstoppable friendliness.
It is a well-wishing.
It's a boundless state too.
It means there's no limit to this.
There's no shortage.
It can go as intensely and as widespread as possible.
It can also just spark here and there.
So however it happens,
It's okay.
And this is a similar practice.
We'll bring different beings to mind,
In our mind's eye.
We call an image of them.
We'll feel into how it feels when we're offering them loving kindness.
And then I'll say some phrases you can listen to,
Repeat silently,
Or you can do your own phrases too.
Or even do your own practice and just let the words roll by.
So the baseline of this is an absence of ill will.
So that's all we're aiming for here,
Is an absence of ill will.
We can go even beyond that.
It also means that we're not going to go even beyond that.
It also is not recommended if we get really,
Really sleepy.
I suggest you open your eyes because that can happen too.
This is often said to be a good practice to get a good night's sleep as well.
And it can feel really good.
And also the exact opposite can happen.
So just know whatever happens,
It's okay.
Sometimes when we're going to wish someone well,
We might have a memory about them that we didn't realize.
And so,
In emotions and feelings,
So this is completely normal.
It happened to me a bunch when I was doing this practice early on years ago.
And if that happens,
It's just coming up to be seen and cleared.
So no need to get worried or concerned about that.
It's actually a purification process too.
And on the other end,
It can be very rapturous,
Even blissful sometimes.
It can feel really,
Really good.
So anywhere in between that and beyond is okay.
So,
Quick overview again,
We'll be doing one for a really dear one,
A loved one,
Where it flows easily.
Pets,
Even trees,
Someone where the relationship is not complicated and love just flows easily,
Kindness flows easily.
And then we'll do it towards ourselves.
And then we'll do it towards,
Or maybe we'll do a neutral person first and then ourselves.
And a neutral person is someone where we don't really know them.
Maybe it's a clerk at a station,
Someone we pass on the street,
Someone like that.
And then I invite you to,
At the time,
Get into a challenging person,
Maybe not our archenemy at first,
But one where we have a challenge maybe where they're a challenging person too.
And maybe we'll spend a few moments doing it for all beings everywhere.
And then after that,
Maybe we'll dedicate the benefit we've gained from this practice.
Okay.
So tuning in now again to the heart area again,
Let's take a few breaths there and let those words go by into our heart.
Now I invite you to bring a dear one to mind,
A loved one,
Where it's effortless to show kindness,
Goodwill,
Friendliness,
Love,
Bringing an image to them,
To mind,
Feeling into that.
And then the phrases to keep on track.
My phrases are,
May you be safe inside and out.
May you be happy and joyful.
May you be healthy and strong.
May you live with ease and peace.
May you be safe inside and out.
May you be happy and joyful.
May you be healthy,
Strong.
May you live knowing peace and ease in your heart.
You're welcome to use imagination on this.
Just keep the same image or whatever feels authentic.
That's the other key thing here.
So whatever adjustments to where this feels authentic,
That's what's recommended the most.
So again,
Inviting our dear ones to mind,
May you be safe inside and out.
And you can use more than one being too.
If we feel one is getting more attention than the other,
We can switch between dear ones.
So that's totally allowable.
May you be happy and joyful.
May you be healthy,
Strong.
May you live knowing peace and ease.
May you be safe inside and out.
May you be happy,
Joyful,
Be healthy,
Strong.
May you live peacefully with ease in your heart.
Let's do this a couple more times here.
May you be safe internally and externally.
May you be happy and joyful.
May you be healthy and strong.
May you live with peace and ease in calling your image,
Strengthening the image,
Feeling may you be safe inside and out.
May you be happy and joyful.
May you be healthy and strong.
May you live with peace.
Okay,
Letting go of that.
And so what this can do is since our mind and heart will sometimes default to negative or even neutral,
This helps build that muscle towards kindness.
And when we build up this strength of kindness and practice of kindness,
It's also a protector because other beings know that we're not a threat and we have their best interest in mind as far as we're able to.
Okay,
Now let's switch to a neutral person.
So this is a being where there's really no strong emotional charge one way or another.
Again,
Think about maybe when you go into a convenience store or maybe if you're getting coffee or tea somewhere and you don't really know the person and you don't really dislike them,
You don't really like them either.
Maybe it's someone you just pass on the street,
Something like this.
It can just even be like a generic type person.
I mean,
That's not the right best phrase for it,
But if no one comes to mind.
And then the same phrases,
Feeling into them,
May you be safe inside and out.
May you be happy and joyful.
May you be healthy and strong.
May you live with ease,
Peace.
May you be safe inside and out.
May you be happy,
Joyful,
Healthy,
And strong.
May you live with peace and ease.
Safe internally and externally.
May you be happy and joyful.
May you be healthy and strong.
May you live knowing peace and ease.
Okay,
Letting go of that one.
And another thing this can help with is ourselves,
Mostly because sometimes the other person can tell,
Sometimes not.
It's great when they do,
But just feeling into how this may feel or how we can see the potential of how this may feel and we may benefit from it in the future,
Compared with the opposite,
Right?
How we feel when we're otherwise,
Let's say,
Or somewhere very dissimilar,
And then how those complications might come from there.
And then the opposite,
When we have a mind that's absent of ill will,
A mind of loving kindness,
A mind imbued with loving kindness,
How that not only benefits us,
But also benefits others,
Because we're all interconnected,
Right?
We can't exist in this world by ourselves.
When we take care of ourselves,
Others benefit.
Okay,
So now for ourselves.
May I be bringing an image to mind of yourself.
May I be safe inside and out.
May I be happy and joyful.
May I be healthy and strong.
May I live with peace and ease.
May I be safe internally and externally.
May I be happy and joyful.
May I be healthy and strong.
May I live knowing ease.
One more time.
May I be safe internally and externally.
May I be happy,
Joyful,
May be strong and healthy.
May I live with peace,
Ease,
Knowing this deep in my heart.
Okay,
Letting go of the image of ourselves,
And then now inviting you to not pick your archenemy,
But maybe a challenging person in our lives.
Maybe it could be recent,
Or maybe it's in the past,
However it is.
Just invite them to mind,
And yes,
We'll just see,
Pay attention to what the heart does,
The heart and mind does when we're bringing that image to mind,
And trying our best or doing our best to wish them well too.
May you be safe inside and out.
May you be happy and joyful.
May you be healthy and strong.
May you live knowing peace and ease.
Image to mind,
Feeling into may you be safe internally and externally.
May you be happy and joyful.
May you be healthy and strong.
May you live knowing ease in your heart.
One more time.
May you be safe inside and out.
May you be happy,
Joyful,
Well,
Strong,
And healthy.
May you know peace.
Then we'll conclude here with all beings everywhere.
So this is quite a jump,
Just you're welcome to do this or not.
I'll just close with this.
May all beings everywhere be safe inside and out.
May all beings everywhere be happy and joyful.
May all beings everywhere be healthy,
Strong.
May all beings everywhere live with peace and ease.
May all beings everywhere realize awakening and be free.
Before we come out of meditation,
I invite you to open your eyes slightly and still be in this energy and practice and intent of compassion and loving kindness.
And then this way we can bring even more of it back perhaps to our daily lives.
And inviting us whatever we found beneficial and helpful from this practice we can we can pick up and take with us into our lives.
And whatever has not been of use or helpful,
We can just leave it to the side and let it be there.
And also invite us all to share any benefit of our practice that we've had today with our loved ones,
Our dear ones,
And anyone else who we'd like to share it with.
We're welcome to keep it for ourselves,
But we're also welcome to share with those beings all the way through to all beings everywhere.
Sharing what's been a benefit today energetically or however we'd like or just our intent to bring this forth what's helpful into the world.
Just spend a few moments with that in our hearts and minds.
If you can,
The eyes are slightly open.
If not,
That's okay.
All right,
Now we can come out more slowly here.
Opening the eyes wider.
Doing any movements that feel good.
Cross my legs.
Someone recommended that spend more time transitioning back from meditation into everyday life because sometimes it can be like the martial artists where you just jump out of it really quickly.
I can stretch the legs in front of you.
Whatever feels good.
