Hi and welcome to your practice.
This practice is a soft,
Loving gesture for those moments when,
As parents,
We didn't show up the way we wanted to.
I invite you to take a moment to arrive,
To allow for your body to settle wherever you are.
Maybe you are in a chair,
On the floor,
Against a bed.
Maybe you are walking,
Sat in a car.
Wherever you are,
You are welcome here.
Let your body settle wherever you are,
Knowing that there is nothing to fix right now.
Nothing to perform.
Just being here.
This moment is for you.
Take a slow breath in through the nose and a long exhale through the mouth.
Inhaling and receiving yourself as you are.
Softening the edges.
Again breathing in,
Receiving yourself as you are,
And breathing out,
Softening the edges.
Now,
Bring to mind a recent moment with your child that lingers.
Maybe this moment happened between you and more than one child.
I will use the word child and I invite you to bring to mind whatever is true for you.
A recent moment that lingers.
A moment where maybe your voice was sharper than you intended.
Louder than you'd like it to be.
Maybe you withdrew.
Or maybe you reacted.
Maybe you felt overwhelmed.
A moment where you weren't as regulated,
Patient or spacious as you wish you had been.
Let it come gently.
We're not here to spiral into the storyline.
We simply want to notice what happens in your body as you remember.
Is there a tightening in your chest?
A sinking in your belly?
Heat in the face?
Cold in the hands?
Pressure behind the eyes?
Is there guilt?
This isn't punishment.
This energy is information.
Guilt is often the nervous system's way of saying connection matters to me.
So place one hand on your heart.
And feel its rhythm.
Feel its strength and softness.
Tenderness and resilience.
And softly tell yourself,
Out loud or internally,
I do care.
And that is why this hurts.
And let's stay here for a few breaths.
Now let's separate what happened from who you are.
Perhaps the moment was dysregulated.
But that does not mean that you are a dysregulated parent.
The reaction was human.
Humans are imperfect.
That does not mean you are unsafe.
You were overwhelmed.
That does not mean you are incapable of love.
Let those distinctions land.
Let your whole body know.
Now imagine your child in that moment you were recalling.
Not frozen in the image of rapture,
But in their wholeness.
See the smallness of your child.
Their developing brain.
Their sense of self.
Their tender nervous system.
And now imagine something equally important.
See yourself.
See the version of you in that moment.
Tired,
Stretched,
Carrying invisible load.
Holding history in your own body.
Navigating your own triggers that were never fully tended.
Can you feel compassion for that version of you?
Not excuse.
Not bypass.
Compassion.
Tell yourself again silently or out loud.
I was doing the best I could.
With the regulation I had in that moment.
And if that feels hard to say or believe.
Instead you could say.
I am willing to learn how to do this differently.
Now you imagined your child in that moment.
The smallness.
The forming sense of self.
The tender nervous system.
And then you saw yourself.
Now it's time to gently see the repair.
See yourself kneeling down.
Or sitting beside the child.
Feeling overwhelmed.
Or holding their hand.
Feel your voice get softer.
See or hear yourself tell them.
I am sorry.
I got overwhelmed.
It's not your fault.
It wasn't about you.
Feel the power of those words.
Children don't need perfection.
They need repair.
And repair teaches resilience.
Let yourself breathe into that truth.
I am sorry.
I got overwhelmed.
It's not your fault.
It wasn't about you.
Now bring your awareness back to your own heart.
Under the guilt,
Under the discomfort,
There is devotion.
You would not be sitting here doing this practice.
If your heart was not filled with devotion.
You would not feel the ache.
If you did not love deeply.
Feel the devotion expand in your chest.
Not as pressure to perform.
But as fuel for growth.
A fertile soil for healing.
Take a deep breath in.
And on the exhale release the belief.
That this one moment you recalled defines.
This one moment that you recall.
It doesn't define you.
Take a deep inhale.
And on the exhale release the belief.
That this one moment defines you.
You are not a single reaction.
You are a relationship unfolding.
A nervous system landing and learning safety.
You are a parent becoming.
Take a deep breath in.
And gently affirm repeating after me.
I am allowed to be human.
And still be a safe parent.
I can repair what ruptures.
My child chose me earth side.
My child is resilient.
Connection is renewable.
Love is not erased by one hard moment.
Take one more deep breath in.
Exhale through the mouth letting it all go.
When you feel ready open your eyes.
And once you open your eyes wrap your arms around yourself.
And give yourself a big hug.
We are doing the most important work.
The sacred work.
It is hard.
It is okay to be learning.
It is okay to be making mistakes.
You are worthy.
You are an amazing parent.
Repair is medicine.
Thank you for sharing your practice with me.
Namaste.
