Bringing Mindfulness to Habits of Resistance or Aversion

This meditation provides practices to bring awareness to habits of resistance or aversion (getting angry, impatient, annoyed, etc.) so that we can abandon behaviors and patterns of thought that lead to suffering and unhappiness.

Transcript

This is a meditation for bringing mindfulness to habits of resistance or aversion to anything normally manifest in feelings of anger,

Annoyance,

Impatience,

Frustration or judgment of ourselves or others.

For this meditation sit in a way that's relaxed and alert,

Opening to whatever you're experiencing right now.

Take some moments to relax and settle by taking some full deep breaths and inviting any area of tension in the body to soften.

Bring to mind a situation where you felt impatient,

Annoyed,

Frustrated,

Angry,

Judgmental or some other difficult emotion.

It might be dealing with an account representative on the telephone and being kept waiting or not getting what you needed,

Or being stuck in traffic,

Or being in conflict with a co-worker or a friend or family member.

Or feeling that you've let yourself down or someone else has let you down,

Or getting angry listening to or reading something that you disagree with strongly.

Try to find something that's more than a one time experience,

Preferably something that forms part of a habit or a pattern of responding.

Let the situation come fully into your mind,

Who was there,

What they said,

What you said or did,

What you were doing,

What you were doing,

What you were doing,

Who was there,

What they said,

What you said or did,

How you felt.

Let yourself experience it all,

But choose not to become caught up in the story,

They did this or I should have done that.

Let go of that and allow yourself to be with the direct experience.

Allow yourself to feel whatever bodily sensations are present.

Heaviness,

Tightness,

Contraction,

Tension,

Heat.

And meet these feelings with acceptance,

With kindness and with interest.

Stay with the feelings and notice if they change,

If they go away for a while,

Get stronger.

Remember,

Meet whatever's present with interest,

With curiosity and with kindness.

Open too to any emotions that are here,

Anger,

Frustration,

Sadness,

Guilt and allow yourself to feel it.

Notice how it feels in your body and say yes to what you're feeling.

And say yes to what you're feeling.

If the feelings or emotions are intense,

Imagine you're riding the waves of feeling and emotion as they get stronger,

They crest and then they ebb.

Observe how the emotions stay for a time and then pass.

Notice any urges to respond that might come up,

To say something or to do something.

And allow yourself to experience the urges and the wishes that come up.

Allow them to come and go.

If thoughts arise about yourself,

What you did or said or could have done or said,

Or about what someone else did or said,

Notice how the feelings are here,

The emotions are here,

The emotions are here.

If thoughts arise about yourself,

What you did or said or could have done or said,

Or about what someone else said or did,

Or about what happened.

Meet these thoughts with kindness and acceptance.

Bow to them metaphorically and let them come and go.

Keep opening in this way to the changing flow of sensations,

Emotions,

Urges and thoughts and let them come and go.

Holding your experience with kindness and with care.

And if and when they subside,

Take some moments to sit quietly with whatever you're feeling.

When we open in this way to these feelings,

Sensations,

Emotions,

Urges and impulses,

And just see how they come and they go,

How they ebb and flow,

Then we can untangle ourselves from entrenched habit patterns,

Habits of reacting with anger or with judgment,

With harsh words.

We can allow ourselves to fully experience the internal reactions without acting on them.

We can choose to make more healthy choices.

Establishing new and more helpful habit patterns.

So let's just sit for a couple of moments,

Opening to whatever is present with kindness and with acceptance.

The French philosopher and author Albert Camus said,

We all carry with us our crimes,

Our ravages,

Our places of exile.

Our task is not to unleash them on the world,

But to transform them in ourselves and others.

Reviews

A helpful meditation offering guidance to support soften the edges within- lovely, thank you!

Another good reminder to let go of what doesn’t serve you. Thanks Hugh.

🙏🏼🎵

Thank you, Hugh, this guidance reminded me that I can remind myself of my choices in life any time I begin to think I am overwhelmed by a fear or frustration.
Thank you,
Donna

Stay with the discomfort and transform it. Before letting go the negative thoughts and feelings to the world, let’s transform them through self-compassion and self forgiveness and transmit what they become with kindness. 💕

I’ve had this meditation saved for a long time. I tried it today and it was a perfect short meditation that I used to address my impatience with a situation.

Thank you for the quote from Camus! It really landed 🌟

Short but potent. It helped me realize I was burying some emotions so it ended in a therapeutic cry. Thank you. 💜

Thank you very much for your wonderful meditation, Hugh.

Thank you for helping me think about thoughts differently.

Great method for dealing with difficult emotions. Instead of running we sit with them and kindly accept what they can teach us. What you resist will persist. Thanks Hugh

Wise words bringing conscious thought into my day. Thank you Hugh. 🙏

Glad and grateful this was here. Experienced a periodic impact of tiredness.
thanks

Thank you for leading through these theme with your soothing voice and your amazing wisdom 🙏

Precisely what I was looking for, exactly what I needed to help me focus in on becoming more mindful and aware of making better choices in my behavior to maintain peace and happiness in my life. Thank you!

I love how you teach Hugh. So simple yet profound with a tangible sense of kindness. You seem to get to the nub of human suffering. Many thanks.

I really enjoyed this one just what I needed.

I hear the softness you bring to the many harder, more difficult experiences that rise up in life, and feel the spaciousness of more acceptance and kindness helping me to let go of my habits of reacting with so much heat and harshness. Easy does it..🙏💗

Another beautiful mediation, thank you again so much for sharing 🙏🧘

Very good thank you!!! Helped me so much