Changing Habits Through Mindfulness

Short talk on mindfulness and habit change concluding with a guided meditation on cultivating the intention to change unhealthy habits.

Transcript

Habits form a very important part of our lives.

Research has shown that almost half of what we do is habitual.

45% of everyday behaviours are repeated in the same location every day.

Some of our habits are healthy and beneficial,

Like putting on a seatbelt when we get in a car,

Or brushing and flossing our teeth,

Or the brain's way of remembering how to swim or ride a bike,

Even if we haven't done it for years.

But we can also get stuck in unhealthy habits.

When we do something to achieve a goal or get a good feeling,

But once it gets established it then causes us harm.

For example,

Eating excessive sweets,

Or drinking unconsciously,

Or repeating self-judging or anxious thought loops.

Habits are the brain's way of conserving energy and resources.

When we do the same thing often enough,

In a consistent way,

Same time,

Same place,

Same people,

Or same feelings,

The brain assigns that behaviour to a faster moving system of brain functioning.

Daniel Kahneman,

Who won a Nobel Prize for Economics and wrote Thinking Fast and Slow,

Calls this fast-acting brain process System One.

System One is habitual,

Automatic,

Instinctual,

And it's connected to our survival,

Fight-or-flight response.

It's connected to the more ancient part of our brain.

What he calls System Two is the slower,

More rational,

Logical,

And intentional processes associated with the more recent part of our brain,

The uniquely human prefrontal cortex.

Though the behaviour initially is carried out to get a reward,

A dopamine boost to the brain from eating a big bowl of ice cream,

For example,

When we're feeling down,

Or the feeling we get when we see many of our friends like our Facebook post.

But if the behaviour is repeated often enough,

It becomes automatic.

It's then triggered by environmental cues rather than by our present moment intentions.

So that,

For example,

Every time we feel a pang of boredom or anxiety,

We check our email or we check social media.

Because of these faster-acting,

Instinctual brain processes,

Habits can be very hard to change,

Even when we want to change them.

But we can change habits,

Even strong and well-established ones.

And the key to habit change is to bring conscious awareness,

Or mindfulness,

To the behaviour.

Mindfulness is meeting our experience with acceptance and without judgement.

It's being present with whatever we're feeling,

Seeing,

Hearing,

Tasting,

Touching and thinking.

And it's essential to changing unwanted habits and developing new,

Healthier ones.

Mindfulness is key to habit change because it brings awareness to behaviours and activities that have become automatic and unconscious.

So with mindfulness,

We're making what is invisible and unconscious,

Visible and conscious.

When we bring mindfulness to a habit,

It opens up the possibility of making a choice.

And we can choose not to carry out an unhealthy behaviour.

Take smoking.

Without mindfulness,

If you have a smoking habit,

You'll reach for and light a cigarette when a particular and familiar urge or stimulus comes up.

With conscious awareness,

With mindfulness,

You can bring awareness to the urge and the accompanying feelings and choose to stay with them rather than lighting up.

It's not easy to change habits because habits develop strong pathways in the brain,

Neural pathways.

And we need to develop the skills to be willing to stay with and experience difficult feelings and learn that we don't have to believe all of the messages,

The urges,

The cravings,

The reactions that our minds repeat.

We'll finish this session with a meditation on intention.

Getting in touch with our deepest intentions,

Identifying a habit or habits that prevent us from living freely and with ease and making a commitment to bring change to a particular habit or pattern that is not serving us.

So this is a meditation on cultivating the intention to change a habit.

Take some moments to sit comfortably and reflect on these three questions.

The first will be what matters most to us.

The second,

What gets in the way of living freely and at peace?

And what behaviors might we want to change?

What habits might we want to make a change in in our lives?

So take a few moments to settle,

Sitting in a comfortable,

Relaxed way.

May be helpful to take a few deeper breaths.

It's allowing you to relax.

Just be here,

Aware of your body,

Feelings,

Whatever mood is present,

Noticing thoughts.

You might ask yourself,

What matters most to me?

What do you care about most deeply for yourself and for your life?

You might think about what a life of ease or well-being or peace might be.

So the intention might be to live with peace or with ease,

To live joyfully,

To be in loving relationships or to manifest your full creativity or whatever your deepest wish for yourself is.

Now imagine you've achieved this peace or well-being or joy or other intention and let yourself take in how it feels.

How it feels in your body,

Your emotions,

Your mind.

You might envision yourself living in this way with ease or peace or joy,

Connection.

And allow yourself to fully feel what's present in your body,

Emotions and in your mind.

You might take a breath and just relax again,

Let go of that question.

And now ask yourself,

What gets in the way of living out this intention in your life,

Here and now?

At this time in your life,

What is it that gets in the way?

What's an obstacle?

Is there a behavior or a pattern of thinking that leaves you feeling unhappy,

Unfulfilled,

Stressed,

Anxious,

Ashamed or some other emotion or feeling?

It might be a craving for something that you want that you don't have or wanting something to change or being distracted or disconnected much of the time or being stressed or anxious.

Notice what comes up for you and meet whatever you experience with kindness and without judgment,

Just letting whatever is here be here.

Notice how you feel in your body,

In your emotions,

In your mind and open to whatever is present.

You might take a nice full breath and relax again,

Let go of that question.

And if you've identified something,

Some behavior or a pattern of thinking,

Something that you do perhaps habitually that isn't helpful for you,

You can ask yourself,

How important is it to make a change in this area?

To let go of an unhealthy habit or develop a more beneficial one?

If you identify a habit or a pattern that you wish to change,

You might think about steps you could take to change this habit.

Let's say for example you want to cultivate the habit of meditation on a daily basis.

You might say,

Each day when I wake up I'll have a cup of tea and then sit down to meditate for 15 minutes or 20 minutes or however long.

Or if you find yourself procrastinating,

You might make a commitment,

I'll work on my taxes each day for at least 30 minutes in the evening.

You might also envision an obstacle to carrying out this new behavior and think about how you'd meet the obstacle if it arises.

And then if you make a commitment to make a change,

To abandon an unhealthy habit or cultivate a new more healthy one,

You could keep a daily record of your efforts to change this habit.

So we'll take a few quiet moments to finish this meditation,

This reflection.

The most important step is to bring our behaviors and patterns of thinking into awareness and then reflecting on whether this behavior or thought pattern is helpful to us.

And then to reflect how important it is to make a change and the steps we need to take to move in a more beneficial direction.

So take a couple of minutes just to sit with whatever is present for you right now,

Meeting it with kindness and with friendliness.

Reviews

Just what I needed. Especially appreciated clear soothing voice.

Can’t believe how long I had this in my listen later folder! Thank you

Thank you for this session it really got me thinking 🤔

Interesting session regarding the two mind sets clarifying thought patterns. New perspective on many levels from mindfulness to the material world.
Will revisit this and enjoy your lives as well. Many thanks for all you share 😌

Great sit on the power of mind mindfulness to sculpt our responses and behaviors toward a changed, better, us.

This brought attention to my deeply difficult patterns of fear based thinking. I live in fear most days and I don’t know how to change it.

Perfect for supporting me in starting to work on my addictive behaviours, thankyou

Excellent! So calming and helpful for my anxiety, procrastination, fear.

Thanks Hugh, very useful tools for positive change via self awareness.

Really useful questions. I was surprised how simple the life I truly want is!

Thank you for this beautiful Mindfullness medication about habits, great topic 💛
And I 💛💛💛

Such wise words, your voice is easy to listen to, thank you 🙏

The right message, presented in a gentle and helpful way, at the right time. Thank you.

Excellent and helpful ! Loved it! Thank you!
🙏🏽💚✨💚

Thank you for motivating me. It is so hard to change but it always starts with one small step!

Really great voice for communicating this important content. Nice and steady meditation with some simple straightforward aspects to think about. Very do-able. Thank you.

Excellent!!! Thank you for this re-framing perspective!

Wow this really helpful in a practical way
Thank you Hugh
Love to you

Well explained how we construct good and bad habits, thanks for your wisdom!

I am looking for mindfulness meditation. This really helped me get started. I liked the science info behind habits. Explains a lot!