Learning To Understand & Accept Death

Over the next 10 days, teacher, public speaker and funeral celebrant, Spike Gillespie, will guide you on a journey to help understand the process of dying, death, and death’s aftermath. Drawing on professional knowledge as well as a number of her own personal experiences, Spike gives us insight into valuable practices to help us move through grief. She also addresses the pragmatic demands of death and offers a unique perspective on the concept of an afterlife, designed to keep the spirits of deceased, loved ones alive. This course ultimately invites you to replace fear with curiosity when broaching the concept of death.

Leçon 1: Death And Dying - An Overview

Every living thing dies. We tell ourselves we know this and believe it. And yet when we are visited closely by death or contemplate our own mortality, fear and denial often cloud this truth. Many current Western ideas around death can feed into fear and denial. In today's lesson, and throughout the next 10 days, we will work to look clearly at what death is and what it means emotionally and spiritually.

Leçon 2: My Life With Death

In today's lesson, Spike delves into a number of her own personal experiences with death, sharing with us the profound insights that death can have on our own process of growth. Spike also explains how each individual's process of grieving is different and emphasises the importance of showing ourselves a deep sense of compassion during times of grief.

Leçon 3: Sudden Death, Protracted Death, Natural Death

When someone dies suddenly, especially a young person, this can prompt emotions that differ from the death of someone very old. When someone dies naturally it feels different from that when death comes tragically through accident, illness, or suicide. In today's lesson we will take a look at the different ways different deaths affect us and learn some valuable coping strategies.

Leçon 4: Making Room For Death

If we know someone is approaching death, this is an opportunity to say thank you and goodbye. It is also potentially trigger-laden if we have had a difficult relationship with the dying person—say, a parent. In today's lesson we will look at ways to prepare for death as well as measures to be taken when we aren't afforded the opportunity to say goodbye in advance.

Leçon 5: Life After Death

Today we delve into an examination of the pragmatic busy work (funeral arrangements, etc), dissociation, and emotions and non-emotions that occur in the immediate aftermath of death. There is no “right” way to feel or react but sometimes the way we feel and thoughts we think can feel inappropriate. Today, we give ourselves permission to feel whatever feelings come up.

Leçon 6: The Stages Of Grief

In today's lesson we will take a look at the stages of grief, drawing on Elizabeth Kûbler Ross’s groundbreaking book On Death and Dying. Over time, Elizabeth's model has been adopted by many, as a compass for navigating the death of a loved one. We will also delve into an number of other schools of thought on the grieving process.

Leçon 7: Processing Creatively

When we are leveled by the death of a loved one, deep depression can ensue. This can include lethargy, a total lack of momentum. In today's lesson, using examples from her life as a funeral celebrant, Spike offers ways to honor the dead that can help them “rest in peace” in our minds and hearts.

Leçon 8: Contemplating Our Own Deaths

The older we get, the more we will begin contemplating the inevitability of death. In today's lesson you will be given some ideas on how to implement the 'Emotional Bucket List:' an end to procrastinating the things that you really want to do with your life.

Leçon 9: Releasing Fear Of Death

In today's lesson we aim to release the fear that is often associated with death and dying. Spike teaches us that the more we show gratitude, are thankful for all beings and situations, and are able to be fully present, we are better equipped at navigating and dealing with all situations in life, particularly those that are emotionally and mentally challenging.

Leçon 10: Afterlife

In this last lesson, we undergo a spiritual examination of what happens when people leave their bodies. This is not so much an exploration of religious notions of an afterlife but more about how people actually do live on in our thoughts, hearts, and memories. There’s a reason we are reminded of someone palpably when, say, we pick up a tomato at the grocery or hear a song or smell a certain scent. This can be startling but also deeply transformative.

Reviews

Thank you Spike for sharing your experience, wisdom and insights. It was a beautiful journey through this course 💜

This was such a peaceful and gradual way for me to grieve. I appreciated and looked forward to each lesson despite the various emotions I felt during this time in my life.

I loved this course. Thank you so much for gifting us with it. I started out listening during mourning for my young son in law. While that grief remains, I am also just beginning to mourn the death of my brother, a few weeks ago. I am sure this course will comfort me as I go through it again.

This was just what I needed. Thank you Spike, you are wonderful for offering this course.

Thank you. That was a beautiful course that has helped me in my grief. 🦋🙏🏼🦋

Very intense and beautiful. A true journey to understand and accept. My dad passed away one year and a half ago and I am still coming around the idea of not having him here with us. it's so confusing sometimes. I know he is in a good place. The hardest part is to get used to the new life without having him around everyday. Honoring his memory is a great way to do that.

While another panendemic surrounds us, here is a thoughtful and loving conversation that we need to have, not just now, but in the future. Spike, I really enjoy your story-telling abilities to show that there is life, love and beauty beyond the loss and sorrow. Thank you.

Thanks a lot it did help me a lot in a worst time of my life and the horrible pain I’m feeling with the death of my mother.

Wonderful course. It was very helpful as I prepare for the elders in my life to make their transitions to next world—whatever it may be.

Thank you, that was immensely helpful 😍

Thank you for the insight of the inevitable for us all. You made me feel more comfortable with my death and those around me.

The most amazing and inspirational course of this platform. It has awaken me to a who new world of posibilities and given me a long sought perspective. Thank you.

Thank you so much. Your words and wisdom have helped me greatly.

Thank you for this. It proved to be so very supportive during my time of my mother’s impending death and the grief that follows.

Thank you so much for this course! Your insights have helped me get through a very difficult time. 🙏🙂

It took me nine months to seek assistance for my grief after the death of my grandfather and five months after the death of my grandmother (they passed away four months apart). My counselor recommended this app and when I came across this course I was hopeful that it would help. It did more than help. It was eye opening and very comforting.

Wonderful course. I returned home today from being with my family halfway across the country as my 97 year young grandmother - the last of my grandparents - had suffered a massive stroke and passed away a few days after my arrival. She had always been spry and in decent health, so age aside, this was quite unexpected. I was blessed to be able to get there while she was aware enough to see me, recognize me, and greet me verbally. To the best of the nursing staff's knowledge, and that of my family (there was always one or more family members in the room with her, sleeping on the couch, taking shifts, etc.), her greeting to me were the last words she spoke in this life. I was further blessed to have had the honor of being with her, along with my mother and one of her brothers as my grandmother passed away.

Though I am of a different faith system than my family, I noticed the physical changes, and also (unaware though my family was) noticed the sudden presence of my grandfather (passed in 1997), come to escort his bride home. The sense of peace and love in the room was so calming. The nursing staff came and removed all medical equipment, and for the next few hours, as my grandmother's body rested in her bed, my mother, uncle, father, and I began packing up her room. All preparations had been made already, down to my grandmother writing her own funeral service and obituary with fill in the blank spots to enter the date, age, cause of death, and location. She, as my mother and I are in our respective generations, was the family historian, and so wanted to ensure all the facts of her life were correct.

I mention this because it was an odd situation, having very little "busy work" to do afterwards. My mother is clergy and my father has been a licensed nursing home administrator much of my life, so none of this was new to them nor to me. The fact that all was already prepared, and that the funeral was delayed a week to ensure my child could get there left a lot of time for contemplation. My mother knew her stages of grief, and I sat to support her, doing the laundry for Grandma's clothing, selecting photos she could choose from for the memorial, etc. She is starting to lose her numbness now though.

I, however, am just now starting to feel the loss myself. I am no longer bolstered by my enormous family (extended and otherwise) and am again far away, with my spouse and child but no other relatives nearby who knew Grandma. My home is familiar; the support is lacking. Next month is the one year anniversary of my other grandfather's death, and I was just starting to get my feet under me from that. I knew I needed some guidance now, and this course popped up.

I listened to the entire thing in one sitting, as I carefully shook the wrinkles from shirts of my grandmother's that are now mine to wear and cherish. I will be returning to this course again, I feel, as it has a wonderful wealth of information and acknowledges all faith (and non-faith) traditions with equal respect. I can feel the tears moving closer to the surface, and I now feel more comfortable in letting them flow and embracing this journey of grief. I would not experience this had there not been such enduring love, and for that I will ever be grateful.

Thank you for this reminder, and for your courage and generosity in sharing your own stories of loss in the name of service to others also on this path. I appreciate you, I respect you, and I see the light in you. Thank you for sharing this course with this community. 🤲❤️🤲

Wonderful help in the healing process!!

Thank you for sharing your experiences in this great course.

Thank you so much for sharing this wonderful course, I found it to be amazingly insightful and comforting and will revisit it many times !
Namaste 🙏🏻🌸🐾