Creating Quality Time With Yourself & Others (Recording)

When designing your ideal day/week, it's important to be intentional and create variety while honoring your needs and wants. Including intentional time with yourself & quality time with others can help you create healthy boundaries, increase connection, & make your day more fulfilling. | If you want to learn how to create your ideal week with intention make sure you check my minimalism course

Transcript

Good morning, Everybody. Happy Tuesday. Welcome to another session. Today, We're going to be talking about a time management topic. And that topic is how to create individual time and quality time with others. I talk a lot about how to manage our time, Strategies that we can use. But certainly, This is a very, Very important area that it's worth a full session. So let's just ease into the session by just doing a little practice, Just getting a comfortable position. If you can, Close your eyes. And just allow yourself to breathe a few times. And just relax for a little bit. I would like you to focus on just reflect about how you currently use your time. And specifically, I want you to reflect about how do you create quality time with yourself, Individual time, And how do you create quality time with others. I want you to become aware of, Are you doing it right? Are you doing it right now? Maybe you are not doing it. Maybe this is something that you are lacking and you really crave it. Maybe this is something that doesn't feel important to you. Just reflect about where you are at now. Are there things that you would like to do that you never find the time for? Are there people that you would like to see more, But time goes by and you just never find the way to make that happen in your life? Do the people around you know what you really need? Do they know what you would like to do? Why, And why that is important to you? For those of you who live alone, It's easy to create individual time because there is no one living with you. So anytime you are home, You are alone. But for those of you living with partners, For those of you living with flatmates, For those of you living with family members, It becomes a necessity to make sure that everybody understands each other's needs and wants. Because if you don't understand them, If they don't understand what you need, How are they supposed to respect you and support you? And how are you supposed to respect and support someone else if you don't really know what they want or need? This is why today's topic is so important. Because it includes your own awareness of what you really need. It includes the awareness of what others need, Especially those living with you in the same house. It includes the communication that needs to happen between you and them. And then it includes the way to support each other, The way to find strategies that may work for all of you. So just sit in there for a little bit in silence and just think about these things. Think about how your life it is right now when it comes to these time management areas. Reflect about your own needs. What do you really need? What do you really want to spend more time in? What do you want to say no to? What do you want others to know so that they can support you, Encourage you, Keep you accountable? Don't forget to keep breathing. And when you are ready, You feel free to open your eyes and come back to the session. Good morning. Buenos dias, Charlotte. Hi, Cecilia. Even alone, We still have to carve out time for ourselves. Absolutely. We tend to get caught into the busyness of life, Right? And sometimes we forget that we can do things. Good morning, CJ. Good morning, Tonya. Thank you so much, Guys, For being here, For showing up. I want to ask you a question before I get started, Right? What does individual time and quality time with others mean to you? Hi, Mary. Hi, Ree. Thank you, Cecilia. Always great to see you, Amelia. Thank you. So what does quality time mean to you? Because the first step for everybody is to really define that. What does that mean to you? And what do you really need from it? Just being and making memories. Good. Being present and focused during these times with myself and others, Mindful of intentions. Beautiful, Julie. And it is OK if you are kind of thinking like, I don't really know. Well, That's great. I planted a seed in your brain. Right now, You are going to think about it. Feeling connected. Con viviendo con mi familia. That means living with my family, Sharing the space and time with my family. Yeah, So in my own personal experience, Both my wife, Samantha, And myself, We both are very individual people. Right? Time that is just mine. Thank you, Cecilia. I love that. We are both very individual people, And we both need to have that time. Guys, If we don't have that time every week, We become frustrated. We cannot show up the way we would like to. We cannot pursue what we want to pursue. We cannot respect each other. And we just don't have anything to give because we are just consumed by life. So in our own personal lives, Specifically my wife and I, We created together. First, We became aware of what each other needs. What do you need, Samantha? What do I need, Emilio? Let's put it on the table. Let's share it with each other. Some examples. Samantha needs, I need time to be alone. I want to be alone. Either in the house or either in the studio that she has, Or maybe. So we make sure that we give each other space alone in the house because we both work from home, And it's very easy to just stay at home all day long and just don't need to get out, Right? So I intentionally try to go and work at the library. I try to go to a coffee place. I try to go and see friends. I try to get my daughter Eva and go and do activities outside of the house so that I give her that time alone in the house. She does the same for me. She also needs to go and do yoga a few times a week. I also enjoy that. I play squash. She enjoys painting and spending time with friends, Doing hobbies. So we need to facilitate each other's needs. And we can do that by becoming aware of them, By looking at a calendar together, And by creating a week where it is clear, This is my time alone. This is our family time. This is when I am taking care of my daughter. This is when I don't have to take care of my daughter and you are in charge. And then by really bringing clarity into that week, That way, We allow each other to thrive, Each other to have what we need. Every person is going to be unique. This is just one example, My own personal example. You don't have to do the same thing. But I will invite you to start with what do you need? And start defining that. Start becoming aware of what do other people that live with me need. Ask them, What do you need in your week? What do you need in your day? How can I support you so that you can get what you need? How can you support me so that I can get what I need in a way that is healthy, In a way that feels good, In a way that it's good for both of us? It's a win-win. It's not something selfish. This is not about you, And that's it. This is about everybody thinking about their own needs, Expressing them clearly, Listening to the other person's needs, And then creating a plan together that feels really good. Everybody feels supported. Everybody feels respected. Everybody feels that they are committed to something. And it is a win-win situation. OK? So let's see what other people say. Complete attention devoted to others when we are together. An interrupted time alone in the early morning to clearly see my day ahead. Thank you, CJ. So that's what you need. And that's your definition of quality time with others and individual time with yourself. Beautiful. So I'm going to start with the definition of quality time with others. So for example, In the case of CJ, If she needs an interrupted time alone in the morning, If she were to have a family with kids and a husband or a partner or whatever, Then communicating that clearly will help the others understand, Oh, CJ now is having quiet time. So we are not allowed to interrupt her right now. OK? And this is what we do with our daughter. Sometimes my wife is doing something by herself, So she leaves the house. And then my daughter sometimes asks, Oh, Is it puppy time now or is it mommy time? Because we try to take care of her. We do family stuff too, But sometimes it's just me or sometimes it's just Samantha because we also work. We are self-employed. So we need to carve out time to be able to work independently, To pursue our hobbies independently, To see friends independently, And then we do stuff together. But to be able to facilitate all that, If we don't have some sort of structure, It's just very difficult. The day goes by and we will never get to it. So that's why for us, Creating that structure was necessary and we both feel more empowered, More because we can do what we want and need. Before, We couldn't. OK? Again, For other couples, For other situations, It's going to be different. And you have to first look at what you really need and then communicate that clearly. OK? So CJ says, It helps to get up three hours earlier than my husband. Beautiful, CJ. So that's your strategy to have an interrupted quiet time. You get up really early, Three hours earlier, And then you have that time to do whatever you want. And that's beautiful. Amy says, Matthew and I struggle with this mostly because he's my full-time caretaker. I have to push him out of the house to go for a bike ride, To work on his art, Or to do anything for himself. I see him getting depressed from overwhelm. Yeah, So Amy, That's a beautiful awareness. And that's beautiful that you are noticing that from your partner. So now that you have noticed that, Communication with him needs to happen and maybe brainstorming new strategies, New ideas, So that he can feel empowered to do what he needs to do. But he also feels that he's not neglecting you, That he's not dropping you, That he's not leaving you alone, And that he's not selfish. It has to be a way that he feels good about it too. And that's something that you both need to explore. How can we make this happen in a way that we both feel comfortable, That we both feel empowered? And then test ideas and see what happens, Right? So one area is creating individual time, Right? Individual time can be time for reflection, Can be time to do your hobbies, Can be time to meditate, Can be time to do chores, To pursue things that you like to do alone, Right? And then quality time with others is intentional time that you spend with other people, And you agree on that, Right? And there is some sort of intention behind it, OK? Sometimes when we are trying to create quality time, And this happens especially when you are living with someone else, Sometimes it becomes necessary, Especially during COVID and now that a lot of people work from home, They both work from home. One of the things that we are finding is that we get on each other's nerves all the time because we are sharing the space. Maybe there are no clear boundaries in place, And then you want to be alone, But then the other person is always there and vice versa. And then that cycle keeps happening, And it's very difficult to get out of it. It's really difficult sometimes to change your mindset and get out of that dynamic. But it's important to really define that. And one thing that we do, My wife and I, Because sometimes we find that maybe I'm doing my own thing and then she enters the house, And then all of a sudden my energy changes. And I don't have a clear expectation, Like, Oh, Am I supposed to be with her now? Should I be doing my own thing with her presence? Is she expecting anything from me? Is it rude if I just do my own thing and ignore her? Are we supposed to talk about something? You know what I mean? When you don't know what needs to happen and it's not clear, And that repeats over and over and over, Then it becomes a frustration. And sometimes it's just unnecessary, Because it's like, Are we hanging out together or not? And then if we say no, Tonight is night off. You do your own thing and I do my own thing, We can share the space, That's fine, But we don't have to watch the same show, We don't have to read the same book, We don't have to talk if you don't want to or need to. We can be in each other's presence, But we are doing our own thing and that's it. And then it feels really good because it's clear. Then I know, OK, I can relax, She's not expecting anything from me, And then I can just do my own stuff. But if we don't set that clear, We end up not doing what we want, But maybe we didn't set the intention to do something together, Because maybe we don't have to spend every night together, But we are in the house and it feels that it needs to be that way. So when that situation happens, Communication for us was necessary, Right? And then setting some boundaries is really good. So again, Different people, Different needs, Different solutions. OK? Let me read the comments. Javier, I love that you are teaching Eva, Mami, And Papi time. Thank you, Cecilia. Well, She needs to understand because sometimes, Because we are both self-employed, We don't have a regular job, We need to alter. We cannot be always both of us with her all the time, Right? So she understands what's going on, And she understands that we split our time. Time to take part in the joy rehearsal regression for me. So that's what you would like to do in your individual time. Beautiful. Let's brainstorm. Yeah, Amy, In your situation, I don't have high expectations about something specific yet. Just allow yourself, Guys, To explore ideas. It's like a game. Just bring some playfulness to the table and say, Hey, We have no idea what to do here. But let's just try a bunch of things and see what happens. And then just start testing them and see which one sticks with you guys. See which one he enjoys, Which one you enjoy. And then after you do that, You come together and then you have a dialogue. And then you share how you felt, If you liked it, If you want to do more of that or less of that, Or try something different. My partner likes to work in our open kitchen living room, So he doesn't feel like he's working. But to me, It changes the whole vibe when I want to make dinner, Et cetera. So Jackson, This is a beautiful example on how just someone's presence, Even if they are not engaging with you, But having someone in your space can change the energy of that space. And clearly, Maybe you enjoy being alone when you make dinner. Maybe you enjoy playing loud music. Maybe you like, I don't know, Whatever you need, It's important that you communicate that to him. And whatever he needs, He communicates that to you. And then you compromise. You find a happy balance. You find something that works for both of you. Maybe he likes to, As you say, He likes to work there because he's in the middle of the energy and he feels like in family time that he's doing his work. But maybe that annoys you. So maybe you can set boundaries here. And then what boundaries? That's for you to decide with him, Right? What feels good to you? What feels good to him? How can you find a happy balance where you both get some of what you need, Or hopefully everything that you need? And then brainstorm ideas and then give it a try. Maybe you divide who is using the kitchen when. Or maybe he's told maybe three nights a week when I'm making dinner, You have to go and work somewhere else. And two nights you are welcome here. I don't know, You guys brainstorm the possibilities that lay in front of you, And then you give them a try. Because there is not a right or wrong answer here, Guys. Everything that you come up with, Just give it a try. Because you don't know until you try. OK? Me and my partner, Tony, Are feeling happy and grateful to be here with Emilio and others in the community. We both and it's really neat this. Thank you, Liz. I'm so happy that you both are here. Feel free to share, Liz, If you feel like it. Liz and Tony, How do you guys deal with this aspect? How do you guys create individual time? How do you guys create quality time with others? And what kind of boundaries are working for you? If you feel inspired, Just share. Because everybody has different situations, And it's very inspiring to see what other people are doing that is working for them. Because we get ideas from that. OK? Yeah, So Matthew and I were living full time in an RV when COVID hit. State laws weren't allowing travel. Yeah, So we felt trapped in this tiny box, But we learned so much about how to coexist. Yeah, Sharing spaces with other guys for a long period of time, It's difficult. Yeah, So I just got chills. I love that. I keep telling him he needs time for himself, But he feels criticized. I can't wait to try this new attitude or exploration playfulness. Thank you so much. I know he will respond to that. Yeah, Amy, When doing this, And this is for everybody, When you are changing dynamics, When you are bringing to the table new needs that may require changes, It can be scary for some people, OK? And we normally don't like changes too much. And especially if we are already overwhelmed, Bringing something else onto the to-do list may seem overwhelming and may seem that, Ah, One more thing to do, One more thing to think about. I don't really want to do this. But let me tell you one thing. If you are constantly on crisis mode, Always overwhelmed, And you never take the time to create something different, What's the likelihood of your situation to change? What is the likelihood for you to create something better? If you just keep doing the same thing and you don't allow yourself time to create something different, Then what is the likelihood for you to create a better life for yourself, A better time management, Open up time for things that you love doing, Very little? So that's why sometimes it's important and necessary to get a little bit uncomfortable, To explore ideas that are new, To give them a try, An honest try. And I promise you that when you start finding something else that is working, You are going to feel better. It's going to be easier because other people are going to understand what you are doing. They're going to support you. You're going to support them. They're going to keep you accountable. They're going to create space for you. You're going to create space for them. And then all of a sudden, You start noticing changes. And you start doing more of the things that you like. And what happens when you do more of the things that you like? What happens when you feel more supported? What happens when you are supporting others and you see them feeling better? You are going to feel better. And then it's like a ripple effect. And then you will have more energy. You will be happier. You will have more energy to look at, OK, Let's look at this area now. Let's try something different here. Let's make this more efficient. I don't want to do that anymore. It's no longer necessary for me. So I say no to that. And you need to explore all the emotions that are going to show up, OK? Emotions are going to show up. And you have to deal with them. You have to cope with them, Explore them, Digest them. So in your case, Amy with Matthew, He's going to have emotions. He's going to feel guilty. He's going to feel selfish. He's going to feel, I don't deserve this. He's going to feel whatever is coming out for him. You need to allow space for that to surface. And then say, Is this really true? Is this really the truth here? Why can't we try this and then see what happens? Again, This is a journey that is going to unfold differently for each of you, OK? So Tonya says, Yes, I have trouble suggesting things to partner without them feeling criticism. I think I'm being kind. Yeah, Tonya, Again, It's easy to feel criticized, Right? But that's why I think it's important when you are communicating with others that you make this process first. It's all about you, OK? It's all about you and what you need and how you feel. That way, You are not asking them anything. You are not putting anything on their plate. You say, I have been feeling this way. I really would love to have more time. I'm trying to find a way to create more time to do this activity that I love. Or whatever it is, Just talk about you, How you feel, And what you need, Right? And then you ask them, How do you feel? And what do you need anything? Is there anything I can do? And then that may open up the door to maybe have a more intentional dialogue, OK? And then maybe now that they don't feel attacked, Maybe they are more curious about, Oh, Why are you feeling that way? Or maybe I can do this for you. Or maybe I had no idea you were feeling that way. It's a good way to start a conversation, Right? So if you guys are interested in doing what's called an imago dialogue or intentional dialogue, I did a session on that that you can release if you want. And it's a structure that really works very well for when you are feeling frustrated. Your pattern is to be on board with doing this. But it's something that you can explore together. And you can both have a turn. You can both express how you feel, What you need, In a healthy way, In a structure that is going to help you facilitate that with more ease and with more intention. Liz says, We spend so much time together that for us separation anxiety is when we are not going to get time away from each other. Yeah, Liz. So again, You need to question yourself, Like, What do you need? Do you need more time alone? Do you need more time together but with more intention? What do you need? And that will help you find different strategies to make that happen, Right? But we do spend way too much time together. And we could learn to set boundaries regarding this. Yeah, Liz, Thank you for sharing. This is something that my partner Samantha and I, We were experiencing. Why? Because for 10 years, We have worked together in the same business, Working from home the majority of the time. We work with people one on one together. And then we travel together. And then we live in the same house together. And then it was becoming too much, Right? We were noticing, Like, Wow, Because we also enjoy each other's company a lot. We share pretty much all the hobbies we have. We play squash. We like board games. We like watching movies, Watching shows. We like hiking. We like. So we share so many hobbies that for us, Our job is to do things independently. And some people don't understand this. And they say, What are you talking about? I need to spend more time with my wife. But again, Every situation is different. Our situation is that, That we spend so much time together that we need to make it a priority to separate, To do things alone, To have quality time with other people that is separated. Because that way, When we get together, We have something to talk about. We give each other space. And we are nurturing our independence too as separate individuals. So that's an idea. And this is a reality for us, Right? That's why we had to create a calendar. And that's why we had to make sure that we are supporting each other, Taking care of Eva and alternating our chores at home so that we both can have independent time because we need that. We were kind of feeling like, Oh, We are so much time together. And it's just too much. We are not spending time with other people. And we need to do that. It's healthy to do that. So it's not weird. For some couples, That happens. Some other couples is the opposite. They are all the time working. Maybe they are outside of the house. And they have to make a priority to get together because they don't see each other enough. So again, Every situation is going to be different. And the needs for quality time and for independent time are going to look different for each person and its family and its situation. So Amy says, I get that. That's why Matthew feels guilty because I can't do the things we used to love to do together. I am seeing the issue. And I'm at a deeper level now. Yeah, Amy, Again, Emotions always show up. When you are trying to manage your time and create different ways of doing it, It's normal that emotions are going to show up. And maybe he's feeling that way. Maybe he needs space to express that in a safe way. Maybe he needs space to allow himself to grieve that loss, Right? Allow himself to, Yes, This is no longer here. And it's OK if I'm feeling sad. It's normal. I miss that. But what can we create from now on that it's going to make me feel better, Right? It's honoring the past and honoring what happened and honoring how you feel, But also looking into the future, Looking at what do you really want from the situation that you are now? What do you really want to create from that? What do you want to change? How do you want to feel? And it is difficult to do sometimes when you are experiencing all those emotions. But it's necessary to make it a priority, To get on that creation state, To get on that what do I want next in my life. And that's why it's so important to connect with that, To really connect emotionally, To get inspired by it, To get motivated by it, To communicate it clearly with the people that you love so that they understand you. And then you create something together, Too. This is also a secret, Right, Like a secret weapon about time management. You need to have goals that are for you as an individual. But you also need to create goals with others. Maybe you create goals with your partner that are exciting to both of you. Maybe you create goals or something outcome, So a trip or whatever activity inspires you and a friend or you and another family member. So it's about always looking towards the future and what do you want to create. How are you going to create time for that? OK. As you always say, Emilio, Healthy boundaries help create a happy balance. Thank you, CJ. It's so true. But healthy boundaries always come from a place of awareness. Healthy boundaries are created from a place of respect and understanding. And the communication needs to happen first in order for those boundaries to be created. And those boundaries can be created in a healthy way. They don't have to be restrictive. They don't have to be imposed. They don't have to be negative feeling. They can be empowering boundaries, Right, Boundaries that are empowering. You understand, Like, Wow, I'm setting this boundary because by setting this boundary, It's going to allow me, It's going to allow us to do x, Y, And z. And when we do that, We're going to be able to experience, To feel, To create, To, And that's what's important, Right, That you really understand why you are creating them. So let me read a recess. My problem is with my husband that we had shared our hobbies, Likes and friends for so long, And were never apart. And since our son was born, We both started spending time apart and figuring out things we enjoyed separately. And now we have little hobbies and friends we share. It is making figuring things out difficult for time together. And we also both need more time apart to do these individual things. Yeah, Since a lot of our time is with work and our son. Yeah, So Rick, You are describing pretty much our situation now. And you have to be gentle with yourself because you are in a state of your life that your life, It's already busy on its own with the basics, Right? You have kids, You have work, You have a relationship. And if you are a creative person, You have your own stuff that you want to work on. So you have to be gentle with yourself. You have to be patient. And you need to prioritize things here. So you don't have to let go of things that you love. But obviously, You have less time for them, OK? So now it's even more important to really be intentional about what are the one or two things that I'm going to invest my time in because I don't have a lot of time. I am raising my kids. I am working. And I am figuring out my relationship with my partner. So I don't really have as much time as I used to before. But again, It's a different reality. It's a different, And you need to accept where you are at. I needed to accept that I became a dad. And that entails being patient. That entails taking care of my daughter 50% of the time. That entails things take time. I cannot do stuff for myself anymore. I have to always think about her and do something that includes her and she's going to be happy with. And then I have to be patient about going to places. It just takes longer. So you just have to accept the new reality. Be grateful about it. Do your best. And then from that place of awareness and from relaxation of, OK, I am OK with my situation. It is what it is now. I accept it. From that place, Then you look at how much time do I really have left. And how am I going to be using that time? And that's the best that you can do. And of course, You won't be able to pursue everything that you used to when you were single or when you didn't have kids. But you still can do stuff, OK? You still have options. Caroline says, Each month I have my sacred quiet day. It's the day where my parent and I do not talk. For me, It is heavenly. She can do what she wants. And yeah, She can do what she wants. And I do what I want. And we just do not talk. The next day, I always feel happy. And it feels good to reconnect. At first, It was challenging to set things up. But now she understands that it is helpful for both of us. So Caroline, Thank you so much for sharing. This is a beautiful practical exercise that you guys do. And it clearly works for you. And I think it's beautiful that for some people, It may feel weird. But again, There are no weird stuff, OK? There are just things that you don't understand, Things that you have never tried or things that you may not enjoy. But that doesn't mean that other people may not enjoy them. And this sacred quiet day, It sounds beautiful. And this is what I do with my wife sometimes. It's not a full day. But sometimes it's like, Hey, Honey, Today from lunchtime until noon, I'm just going to be doing my own stuff. I may show up into the house, But I will leave. I just want you to treat us if I was not here, OK? So you don't have to expect anything from me. I don't expect anything from you. You are on your own for dinner or for lunch. And we are just doing our own thing, OK? So don't count on me for anything. And it just feels so freeing because I know what I have to do. I know what I can do. I know if she shows up into the house, I know that I don't even have to acknowledge her if I don't want to. And she knows that I don't have to because she's doing her own thing. So it can be very interesting to give it a try to exercises like this. Grief and loss of what used to be is overwhelming. I like the word creation and looking forward. Yeah, Amy, Creation and looking forward is important and necessary. Because if you don't do that, You are always living in the past. You are always living by emotions, Feelings, Experiences that happened in the past, But they are not real anymore. And you are always going to be separated. You are always going to be feeling lack. You are always going to be feeling disconnected from the reality that was and is not anymore. And from that place, You are always going to be tense. You are always going to be frustrated. You are always going to be impatient. That's why it's important to really accept your current situation. Right now, This is where I am at. That's what happened, But I choose not to let my emotions change because of what happened that I have no control anymore. The only thing I can do is, From this place, Start creating something different. Start creating something new. And find something that feels good. Find something that feels inspiring, Doable, And then share that and do more of that. And then, As things get better, Then you can maybe do a bit more and a bit more and a bit more. But you need to really honor and accept where you are at right now. And sometimes it's very difficult to do that. I understand that. But if you don't do that, You are always going to be in a state of stress, In a state of not in a positive place. And from that place that is not positive, What are you able to create? You cannot create good stuff from a place that doesn't feel good, Right? So you have to get yourself to a place that feels, OK, I'm good here. I accept my situation. What can I do from here? And then start moving forward with things that are doable. Erin says, This is something I struggle with mid-time. My husband works and I don't. But I have the kids at home with me and have to take them with me when going somewhere. My husband doesn't understand or respect that I need some time alone. He hasn't become convinced to listen to the talk on the IMAGO dialogue. It's difficult. Yeah, Erin, This is a dynamic that is happening, Right? And it's difficult because this is sometimes imposing so many women. Majority of the times, From what I see, The reality that I see around me, Someone has to stay home. It makes more sense, Majority of the time, That is the woman because maybe the man is busier or maybe they make more money or maybe they cannot breastfeed. So it can fall into woman so many times to do that work, Right, And to be home. And that's why when we had our daughter Eva for us, It was really important that that wasn't the reality for us. It was really important for me and for my wife. My wife will not allow that to happen. Let me tell you that. She will say, Emilio, You are taking care of the kids now because I have to go now. So she will not let that happen, Right? But sometimes you may not be as verbal. You may not be as strong. The dynamic will look different for you. But again, You need to find a way to create time, Whatever that means. Maybe that means using a babysitter. Maybe that means using family members. Maybe that means having a conversation with your husband and say, I need x amount of time a week, And we have to figure out a way to make this happen because I'm going insane. Whatever that is for you guys, You have to figure that out together. But there are support systems that you can use. And we use family friends. So we use family. We use friends. For example, We were babysitting our friend's daughter for five days. And they went to LA. They went to a trip. And then they were able to enjoy five days by themselves that otherwise they will not be able to do. So that's how we supported them. And then if we need the same, I'm sure they will do it for us. And that's when you start kind of supporting each other so that you can get some time. There are many different ideas. But I know it's tough. And I know I see your situation in many, Many other families. And sometimes it requires changing the dynamics. And sometimes changing the dynamics can be a little bit traumatic, Can be a little bit you are going to face resistance for sure because things are working good for some, But you are not feeling well with that. So you need to find a way to create something there. Maybe one or two nights a week, He's responsible to stay home. And you get to go out for a couple hours. Or maybe you spend more money on baby series. And he needs to be OK with that. I don't know. Again, You can brainstorm ideas with him. But you have to verbalize that more clearly. And you have to don't accept what it is if it's not serving you. And if you need something different, You need to find a way to communicate that more clearly. OK? So time is almost up. Let me see. Yeah, So guys, Thank you so much for being here. I see lots of comments. I have to go because I have another session. I actually have an appointment with my counselor at 11. So I have to go and get ready for that. But yeah, Guys, The main takeaway for this session is first to really become aware and really understand what individual time means to you and what quality time with others mean to you. So that's the first step for you. Really make a practice. Go in nature if you need to. Spend some time with yourself. And really, Really describe what that means to you. Really journal down the things that you need. OK? What do I need for quality time? With others, What do I need for independent time with myself? Right? And what does that look like? And how much do I need a week? And how am I going to use that time? What activities am I going to engage with that I can now? And then once you have that clarity and how you feel about that, Then the second step is to share that with the people that you love, The people that you live with, In a way that is not demanding anything from them, In a way that is your self-reflection. And you are letting them know, I want to change this in my life. I want to see this happening in my life. I am brainstorming ideas to make this a reality. OK? And then from that place, You will ask them, Hey, What do you want to see in your life? What does quality time with others mean to you? And what does, Just have a conversation. And if they are open, Like, Have a conversation and then have fun with this. And then from that place of awareness and connection and communication, That's when you can then bring the idea of let's brainstorm different strategies to make this a reality. What can we do differently to make this a reality? Or to see more of that. OK? Maybe you are not going to get 100% of what you want. But even if you get 20%, That's better than 0%. OK? And I promise you that when you get started making changes, Creating more changes is going to be easier. Because when you start creating changes, OK? You are going to start feeling better. You are going to start opening up time. You are going to feel more fulfilled. You are going to communicate better. And then it's a ripple effect. And then creating better and better and more change is just going to be more accessible to you. Right now, It may seem impossible. But you need to get yourself to that place of acceptance and creation. When you are accepting yourself, You are accepting your situation. You cut yourself down. You try to put away the stress, The anxiety. All the emotions just come to the present moment. And then try to be at peace. And then from that place, You start thinking about, What do I really want? And start paying attention to what you want. Investing your time and energy into the things that you want. And stop thinking about the things that you don't want. The things that you are frustrated about. Stop thinking about them. And start focusing more on the things that you want to see and how you can make them happen. And I promise you that you will start seeing changes. OK? Yeah, Well, Thank you guys so much for being here. I hope that this session was helpful. And I hope that you guys got something from this. And again, I hope that I planted a few seeds there that for you to do things that you have never done before. To be more courageous and to be more willing to try things instead of doing what you are currently doing if it's not serving you anymore. OK? So guys, I have to go now. Thank you so much for being here. And I will see you on Thursday. That we're going to be talking about strategies to stay motivated and excited. OK? We're going to be talking about strategies to keep you excited about the things that you want. So that you can keep your energy high, Your mindset high. And you can cope with the emotions and the belief systems and everything that may show up along the journey. OK? Until then, Have an amazing rest of your day. And I will see you on Thursday. OK? In the meantime, If you want to check some of my courses, That's the best way to support my work. To enroll in my courses and engage in the course classroom. That's way better than donations. That's way better than anything else. So if you guys want to support my work, If you like what I do, The best way for you to support me is to enroll in one of my courses, Learn a lot, And engage in the course classroom as much as you can. OK? Amazing, Guys. Have a beautiful day. And I will see you on Thursday. Adios.