Don’t Make Excuses: Dismantle Complications

There are things in your life that are truly complicated, but there are also many things that are not complicated but seem complicated. In this module, you will learn to differentiate between real and unnecessary complications. You will also free yourself of self-imposed limitations, and understand what type of motivation serves you.

Transcript

So today we will have a look at what you perceive as complicated and what you perceive as difficult.

Our goal is to differentiate between your real and your self-imposed limitations and hopefully you will shift towards an attitude in which you want to dismantle what seems complicated.

An unknown philosopher said it's really complicated to make something simple but very simple to make something complicated.

Let's look at how simple and stress-free you want to live your life.

Most likely you didn't have to work during your childhood to help with your parents tax returns.

You didn't have to pay rent when you were still young and you weren't busy thinking about how to create a life partnership.

Hopefully and most likely your life was not complicated when you were a child.

Now if your parents did a good job during the time you were becoming an adult then they slowly made you aware of how to dismantle and not shy away from things that seem complicated at first sight.

Your parents hopefully taught you how to deal with life's challenges.

So depending on your childhood you might perceive life as manageable or as complicated.

Become aware of your current mindset and think about if and how changing your mindset can serve you and raise your awareness around the word complicated and what parts of your life that word describes at the moment.

So apart from your upbringing why else might you experience parts of your life as complicated?

The first reason is that is that there would be another deeper worry underneath a perceived issue and that deeper subconscious worry manipulates you into thinking the task at hand is complicated.

This often happens when you're not fully content with the potential outcome of a task.

So you need to become content first with potential results.

If you're content with all outcomes the perceived complication might already dissolve.

Another reason for making something seem complicated is working at maximum capacity already.

Somehow it is easier for us to say this is too complicated rather than say I'm already at full capacity.

This might not seem like a big deal but I think it is.

Describing something as complicated to avoid the workload belittles you,

Makes other people perceive you as less able than you actually are.

The next reason something might seem complicated to you is because of concentration issues.

If you have concentration problems then a lot of things might seem a whole lot more complicated because you actually don't have the mental stamina to focus.

The solution then is to work on your mental capacity and concentration first.

Please note that concentration issues often derive from our modern lifestyle,

For example cell phone addiction.

By the way,

Children by nature cannot focus on things for a long period of time.

They are more limited and might see things that are easy for adults as complicated.

So do have compassion for children.

Now the last reason you might experience something as complicated is that other people make it out to be.

People often pretend things are complicated for their personal benefit which is usually them selling you their services.

Most of our jobs nowadays are extremely specialized.

We have little general knowledge and skills which means it is easy to make things seem complicated.

To avoid being taken advantage of,

Try and understand an issue in as much detail as you can before hiring a specialist.

This protects you from people fooling you into believing something is overly complicated.

Now that you gained awareness of why you might perceive things as complicated,

Let's look at your mindset.

First of all,

Let's differentiate between difficult and complicated.

Difficult is your perception of the mental and physical effort it takes for you to do something.

Complicated is your perception of something that is elaborate,

Has subsystems and is extremely hard to understand.

This means that it is a whole lot easier to deal with something that is difficult than something that is complicated.

This is important because often what seems complicated at first is actually just difficult.

Now it is human nature to investigate,

To dissect further and further and as a result make structures as complicated as possible.

Our brains are very inquisitive but it is your choice as to how far you participate in any investigation.

The way you experience things in this work is at least partially your choice.

You can look at a leaf and just admire the beauty of nature for a minute.

Or you can look at a leaf and think about its structures,

Materials,

Molecules,

Atoms.

I'm not saying investigating is wrong but I am saying that it will serve you to be aware of how complicated you want to make certain things in your life.

Make sure you're aware of what level of complexity serves you.

This brings us to our next point which is that most things are only partially outside of your abilities or capacities.

Let's take paying tax as an example.

If you fill out a tax report,

95% of what has to be filled out is within your capacity.

Now you're also aware of the 5% that is outside of your capacity and you can get help for specifically this 5%.

All of a sudden paying tax is not complicated anymore.

It is now achievable with merely 5% being difficult to understand.

There's no more mystery around it.

You know what help you need and know your actions.

You know your path.

Before we come to our practical exercises,

I want to again acknowledge limitations and invite you to embrace them.

There are things that are not within your reach that are within mine and there are things that are within your reach that are not within mine.

That is not only natural,

It is necessary.

It is necessary because it is what makes us unique and it is what drives us to connect and collaborate.

It is what allows for you to build your communities.

See your limitations as a gift and an invitation to connect.

Every human being has different limitations and who says one is more important or impressive than the other?

I sure don't.

I might find it difficult to fly an airplane but I don't find gardening difficult.

Maybe I will help a pilot gardening and he or she will fly me somewhere.

So remember,

Don't limit yourself and don't devalue what you have to offer.

Life is not supposed to be lived constantly being confronted with complexity.

Life is supposed to be lived in ease,

At ease,

In harmony,

In collaboration and in unity.

Now let's talk about the practical part of today.

I would like to invite you now to write down three challenges you face that seem complicated to you.

Whatever comes to mind when you think of the word complicated.

It could be from an area like work relationships,

Friends,

Housing,

Money,

Anything.

Pause the course now and write down your three observations.

Now let us have a look at your list.

I would like to invite you to analyze your complicated issues.

Do you actually have capacity for them?

Are you able to unfold them and deal with them?

Are your problems really complicated or is someone else just telling you something is complicated?

And how complex is the issue and what parts are actually easy to understand?

Take a few minutes now to dismantle your complications.

Again,

Pause the course here and come back to it when you're finished.

Now over the next few days or during this week,

Whenever something seems complicated in your life,

Try to identify what exact parts are complicated.

Don't just let the feeling pass unnoticed.

Every time you have the feeling something is too complicated,

Investigate it.

You might get surprised.