Hello,
Dear one.
This guided meditation is all about self-acceptance.
Self-acceptance means accepting ourselves for who we are in this very moment.
It means relating to ourselves the same way we would relate to someone for whom we love and care deeply.
When we accept ourselves,
We permit ourselves to be human,
To fail,
To make mistakes,
And to learn and to grow.
We accept our weaknesses instead of feeling somehow less than because of them.
Likewise,
We accept our strengths but do not feel superior because of them.
Self-acceptance means that you allow yourself to be as you are.
I'd like to ask you to close your eyes now if you haven't done so already.
Just focus your attention on your breath.
Notice how you breathe in and breathe out.
Just allow yourself to do just that.
Breathe in and breathe out.
There's nothing you need to achieve or become.
In this meditation,
You cannot fail or succeed.
Just see how it goes.
Simply breathe in and breathe out.
Feel how the air flows through your nose,
How your chest expands when you breathe in,
And how the air moves out when you exhale.
Just follow the breath like this for a few moments.
Self-acceptance,
As the term suggests,
Is about the self.
But who is this self?
Who are you?
Let's go back and explore how you self-developed.
For this,
I'd like to ask you to go back with me in time.
Imagine the moment you were born,
The moment you came to this planet as a baby.
You had no idea about right or wrong,
No idea about anything.
You just were.
You were looking at this world with brand new eyes.
Try to visualize yourself as a baby as vividly as possible.
Now imagine that someone would tell you,
This baby,
That you are not good enough yet,
That you need to find a good job later in life,
That you need to make enough money or become successful to be enough,
That you would be worthy of love only if you were to become successful in the future,
That you are not enough the way you are now,
That something has to be added to you,
To this baby,
For you to become worthwhile.
Can you imagine yourself saying to your newborn child that he or she is not good enough yet?
Perhaps you agree with me that it makes no sense to consider the worth of this new human being,
To be dependent upon something that he or she may or may not become.
Can you feel how enough you have been from the very moment you entered this planet?
You've always been enough.
You have always been whole,
Always worthy of love.
Love is not something you need to earn.
It's your birthright.
For a moment,
Allow yourself to see if you can feel the truth behind these words.
Now let's slowly move into the future.
You are no longer a newborn baby,
You're a young child.
As you mature,
You learn about right and wrong,
Good and bad.
Your caregivers teach you what it's like to be a good girl or a good boy.
Soon you notice that some things cause people around you to react more positively toward you.
They praise you and they say they're proud of you.
Maybe you notice that when you work hard at school,
Help others act kindly,
Get high grades or look beautiful.
You receive positive attention from others.
Likewise you learn that some things you do result in negative attention from others.
Maybe you notice that when you fail in school or hang out with the wrong crowd or dress differently,
People react in a disapproving way toward you.
Soon you learn that some things cause the people around you to approve of you and perhaps even admire you.
For a moment,
Being approved by others feels good.
It feels as if you are good enough.
It feels as if you're whole,
That you are loved.
How reassuring this is.
However this feeling does not last long.
You now need to make sure that after this moment of praise,
You continue to get their approval.
So be a bit like a drug.
Once the effect is gone you need more.
So you continue to do what will give you that feeling.
That feeling of relief.
That feeling of being good or enough.
Now I'd like you to think back to you as your youngest self that you can remember and connect to this young person.
Remember what it felt to be you at this young age.
This may take a bit of time,
But just see how far back you can go and try to connect to your childhood self.
Perhaps you're around seven years of age,
Or maybe you're twelve,
Or maybe older.
How far back you can travel doesn't matter.
All that matters is that you connect to yourself at this younger age.
Now have there been times in your few years of life where you have felt a need to be approved by others?
If you can,
Allow yourself to go back to such a moment.
What do you see?
What do you feel?
What are you doing to reassure yourself that you are enough to see what comes up?
Let's now continue to move forward in time.
As you grow older and become more mature,
You continue to be exposed to a world that appears to have rules for a successful human being that define things or action that people need to achieve to be considered valuable or worthy.
Depending on your environment,
You may learn that things like money,
Status,
Appearance,
Intelligence,
Power,
And physical strength are important.
These things are important because they reveal information about your worth.
For a moment,
Try to remember what it was like when you were a teenager or a young adult.
Visualize yourself around this time as best you can.
What was important to you at this age?
What were you striving for?
What did you believe made you worthy,
Successful,
Or enough?
So far,
We have explored what we can call your conditions of self-worth.
Conditions of self-worth are those things that we believe make us lovable or enough.
We strive for these things so that we can feel we are loved unconditionally.
Many people live in constant fear of not being enough,
And as a result,
They spend their entire lives trying to live up to the expectations and standards that surround them.
These standards are conditions,
Hence most people suffer from what we can call conditional self-acceptance,
When we accept and love ourselves just as long as we meet these standards.
Okay,
Now come back to this present moment,
Keeping your eyes closed,
But bring yourself back to where you are,
Sitting or lying here in this room listening to my voice.
Consider your current life.
Are there standards that you've picked up during your life and that you are using to evaluate yourself today?
What are they?
How do you know these standards are still influencing you today?
How do you feel when you're not able to meet these standards?
Imagine the little child inside of you,
The child you once were,
Who was afraid of being unloved,
That you might do something that will cause other people to disapprove of you.
And just visualize this little boy or little girl standing in front of you,
Looking back at you.
You can feel the child's fear of not being enough.
This child is in deep need of being loved.
Thankfully,
You have the opportunity now to say something to this child.
What would you say?
What would you do?
Can you see that you have always been worthy of love from the very first day you arrived?
Can you see that everyone is equally worthy from the time they are born until the time they die?
As a child,
You may achieve little,
And yet you're still precious and worthy.
When you're old or poorly,
Relaxed or asleep,
Or simply doing nothing,
You still are worthy.
Your worthiness cannot be measured.
It can never change.
During your lifetime,
You may do bad things,
But these things do not make you a bad person.
Similarly,
You may do good things,
But these don't make you a good person.
Your worth is always there,
Along with your potential to grow and learn from your experiences and your mistakes.
Since you cannot measure or change your worth,
There's no point in being concerned about it.
As best you can,
Let it go.
You are enough,
Just the way you are.
Rather than seeking out your worth,
Devote your time to learning,
Exploring,
Growing,
Connecting and enjoying life.
We cannot control whether other people appreciate us or accept us,
But we can learn to accept ourselves.
And now if you're ready for it,
You can decide to become more accepting of yourself intentionally.
This is a moment in which you can decide to see yourself for who you are rather than what you believe you should be.
To start with,
Allow yourself to be exactly as you are in this moment.
How do you feel right now?
Whatever you feel at this moment,
Whether it's pleasant or unpleasant,
Allow it to be there.
This is you at this moment and that's okay.
You are okay the way you are right now,
Regardless of what you think or feel.
Notice what goes on in your body.
Maybe there's tension in your shoulders or discomfort in your stomach.
Maybe you feel relaxed.
You may feel nothing at all.
It's all good.
And if you want,
You can say to yourself,
It's okay.
Whatever I feel,
It's okay.
Let go of the need to mold your feelings into something different.
This is you at this moment and that is enough.
And finally,
I encourage you to silently repeat the following phrases to yourself.
May I accept myself for who I am right now.
May I realize that my strengths don't mean that I am more than others.
May I realize that my weaknesses don't mean that I am less than others.
May I accept my imperfections.
They don't define me or take away from who I am as a person.
May I feel and deeply know that I am enough now and that I will always be enough,
Regardless of what happens.
May I realize that I deserve to be loved now the same way as I deserved to be loved when I was born.
May I treat myself the way I treat those for whom I care deeply.
And now take a moment,
Bringing your attention back to your breath.
And then when you feel ready,
Gently blinking your eyes open,
Reacquainting yourself with the space you're in.
And now take a moment,
Bringing your attention back to your breath.
