Welcome to Life Unedited,
The Power of Radical Acceptance,
28 Theories of Living in Reality.
This is a series of practical strategies to use in life through the lens of reality for turning obstacles into opportunities.
I'm Tiffany and this is Theory 21,
Jealousy.
Jealousy does not mean we love someone.
Jealousy is our own insecurity.
I have to admit my guilty pleasure is reality television.
I love watching it through the scope of my practice of reality and at the same time want to pull my hair out.
I've stopped myself so many times from writing to one of these shows and giving them what I think is a brilliant idea.
Do a reality show,
Let's say Love Island,
With a twist.
Let me be the counselor on the island.
Have the islanders do individual and couples counseling and have group to process after their games.
If I had a dollar for every time that I heard the statement,
I get jealous so that tells me how much I actually care.
I could afford my own reality show.
Somewhere along the line in history,
We decided that jealousy is a sign of love.
When we love someone,
It is normal and even expected to be jealous.
That could not be further from the truth.
Just like worry,
Jealousy is a negative emotion and love and care are positive emotions.
Negative cannot equal positive.
Different than worry though,
Jealousy is a projection of our own insecurity.
When we are jealous,
It is because we are insecure or uncertain in our relationship.
Our insecurity comes from a fear of losing the person and or the relationship.
We create a story that someone has something we don't and that something will take our partner away from us.
Or we are not trusting of our partner or our relationship.
Those are both projections of how we feel about ourselves.
We don't believe that we are good enough and or we do not trust ourselves.
That does not mean that we are not trustworthy.
It is more about not trusting ourselves to pick the right partner.
When we are in a healthy and secure relationship,
We will not be jealous but rather supportive and trusting.
Jealousy gives us an opportunity to dive into ourselves in an effort to unearth the stories underneath to process and heal.
We have to ask ourselves the tough questions about jealousy.
Is it about our own lack of self-worth or trust?
Could we grow in this opportunity?
Could relationships feel more secure and trusting if we were more secure and trusting in ourselves?
