Hello,
Hello.
My name is Jessica Amos,
And I am so happy to be here with you today.
Today I want to talk about actually a topic that often feels very confusing,
And that is the topic of gratitude.
I don't know about you,
But when I'm in a particular mood where life is feeling really hard or challenging,
For whatever reason.
I am very resistant.
To the concept and the idea and much of what exists out in the self-development,
Self-help world,
Which is,
Oh,
Just be grateful.
Years ago I went to this wonderful four-day silent nature retreat.
One of our practices was to go walk in the woods.
For 30 minutes.
And speak out loud.
Things I'm grateful for.
Thank you for listening.
The air,
Thank you for the trees,
Thank you for the ground,
Thank you for the leaves.
The assignment was to go for 30 minutes without stopping,
To not pause,
To not overthink it.
The teacher told us,
She said,
You don't have to feel grateful to do this practice.
Just do the practice and see what comes up.
And the first thing that pops into your mind,
Just say,
Thank you for this.
Thank you for this.
Thank you for this.
Like don't resist whatever the thing is.
I was very uncomfortable with this practice at the time,
But I went out and found this spot in the wood and it was winter.
It was raining and damp and the air was cool and fresh and pungent with earthy sense.
And so it wasn't so hard knowing that I don't have to feel grateful.
I could just see things.
I could,
I could see the rock,
I could see the tree,
I could see the sky and I could say thank you.
And then I'd get close up on the tree and I go,
Thank you for this bark and thank you for the veins and the leaves and thank you for this droplet of water.
Thank you for the dry leaves on the ground and thank you for my shoes and my socks.
" And it started to become easy,
Like literally there's an infinite number of things that I can see.
But then I started getting these things to say like,
Thank you for my mom.
Thank you for my stepdad.
The ideas were coming to me to be grateful and to say,
Thank you.
For things that I really didn't feel grateful for in my life.
I wasn't grateful for my mom,
Wasn't grateful for my stepdad,
Challenging things.
Sort of coming,
Thank you for my home or thank you.
The $2 I have in the bank.
It was difficult because these are things that I was upset about in my life,
But I kept following through with what was coming up.
And then it was,
Thank you for my kids and thank you for this body.
And it started to grow into other people and other places and other things.
And then it was,
Thank you for that stranger who smiled at me that one time I was having a hard day.
It really started to expand outward.
Around even some of the painful things.
And I was able to expand my attention and awareness on more than just the things that were hard.
My daily life now,
To just sit in my home and say,
Thank you.
And even thank you to myself for creating this beautiful space in which I get to live and exist and be.
So my question to you today is,
Do you have a gratitude practice?
What does gratitude feel like for you?
What is the feeling of gratitude?
I would love to hear that.
Is it a specific feeling?
Or is it just a practice?
Like you don't have to feel gratitude to express gratitude.
And then that begins to open you.
Are you resistant to gratitude?
What is the relationship that you have with gratitude?
Does it support you?
Or is there another way that you feel supported that maybe isn't specific to gratitude?
But that helps you get into a space of feeling more abundant.
Like life is less of a struggle.
Thank you for being here with me.
Until next time,
May you stay with yourself today and always.
