When You Let Go Of Who You Think You Should Be | Retreat

In the second part of our half-day retreat, we explore how the images we hold of ourselves—of how we think we should be—can keep us trapped in striving, shame, and self-rejection. Whether we chase the image of being more peaceful, more spiritual, more lovable, or more whole, each one quietly tells us we're not enough as we are.

But when we begin to see these images clearly, we open a space of freedom. We stop trying to fix or improve ourselves, and instead learn to flow with life, just as it is—welcoming all parts of ourselves, not just the ones we’ve labeled “good.”

This isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about coming home to the truth of who you are, beneath the image. Nothing left out. Nothing to improve. Just this moment, just this breath, just this life—fully met.

Transcript

Yeah, I'd like to hear a little bit about what the experience was. And again, Anything that you saw with the images, Any places that you're confused about these images, So that we can also clear that up. Because it's so easy, It's so easy to think to think in some way that, No, These images are motivating me to be a better person, Right? All the little ways, All the little lies that we tell ourselves about getting caught up in these images. So we really want to be clear about the trap that those images are creating. So when you're saying imagining the better version of you, You weren't sure how to approach that Libby. So I wasn't saying to imagine it like to, It was more, What are the different ways in which you see yourself as a better version, Right? I mean, Even just Libby's my sister, So we can say, Oh, I'm the good sister. We can imagine ourselves as the good sister or the bad sister, Right? Or in the future, When I keep doing these practices, I'm going to be more, I'm going to be less reactive. So I'm going to be this better version of myself. So just to see the ways in which we keep putting the carrot out in front of us, We keep imagining there's something here that should be better. And once it's better, Just new and improved, Self-improved, Whether I'm more realized, I'm more spiritual, Any way that we're doing this, We're just imagining what we are as something in the future. And we are missing seeing what we are in this moment, The reality of who we are, That we are not a thing, We're not nothing either, Right? We do exist, We're all here, But that we, This is, You know, This is the thing is that we imagine ourselves to be the solid, Independent little me. And how we imagine ourself in all these different images is what keeps us locked up into the fantasy of who we think we are. And instead of recognizing, Oh, I am a, I am an ever-changing interdependent arising, A process. Whatever we think that we are, That we can put in a box, That we can put in an image is not who we really are. And that's the problem with these images and with these spiritual images and these self-realized images in this, My highest self image is that we, What we're imagining is not who we are, It's just the ego disguised again, Fooling us again, We're looking in the wrong place again. And this is a trap in spirituality where we have conflated materialism with spiritual, Where we come up with spiritual materialism and self-help and self-improvement with spirituality. And so we just keep putting this out in front of us and missing what it is that's here, That there is no new and improved version to become. You'll never become, You'll never be it because first of all, It's outside the realms of reality, Outside the workings of reality, In that it doesn't matter how mindful you are, How present you are, You will fall occasionally, The wrong words will come out of your mouth occasionally. You will have a day where you're feeling a little tired, You're feeling a little down, Maybe feeling a little unkind, Feeling a little selfish in that moment, And there's nothing wrong with that, Those are just the conditions that are arising, We don't have to make an image out of it, But it's for us to just recognize we are not one thing, And we are not trying to become one thing, But we are just constantly changing. Yeah, And Libya, Accepting what you are in this moment, Who you are, Is the result of trillions of causes and conditions. Right? So this idea that I should be somehow different, How? I mean, If I look at the mountain, Like looking at the mountains, Say you should look different. Why would the mountain look different? It's the result, Pointing to the mountains behind me, The Kakachila mountains, Why would the mountain look any different? It's the result of trillions and trillions of causes and conditions, So is this arising the result of trillions and trillions and causes and conditions? So just not feeling badly about ourselves, I should be better, I should be different, Because it's in that striving and wanting to be better that in fact causes more stress, Causes us to become more mindless, Causes us to get more lost in the ego, And ends up taking us further away from what it is that we want, Thinking about ourselves more often, Instead of having genuine compassion and wisdom. So on a relative level, I'll say, Yeah, It kind of, It's ironic that when we let go of the image of who we think we should be, That the freedom, Of course, Is there, Because I'm no longer tied up in who I think I have to be. It's a nightmare. It's a nightmare living up to this image of having to be something. It is just endless suffering. So the freedom that comes from that, That there's such a sense of ease and calm, That yes, You're generally a more present person, You're kinder, You're more relaxed, You're easier to be around, You don't hate things as personally, As personal as you used to. So yeah, There it's ironic that yeah, You let go of it, You feel free, You feel better, And all of a sudden, Because you're not wound up and attached to something, It's like, Yeah, You flow a little easier, You're a lot easier, It's a lot easier to be around us. So yeah, It's this idea of something's wrong with me and I need to fix myself that gets us trapped in these images. I just want to go back to Janine. So you're saying, It was great, Very glad to hear that. You needed the two hours for the journal prompts. You stopped after 30 minutes, Meditated and did some movement, Very enlightening to think, I need to be a good girl, Right? I mean, If I need to be a good girl, Then I can also be the bad girl, Right? Whatever we can envision on the positive side, Its opposite will arise. And in fact, When we are lost in the fantasy of whatever that positive is, We are fueling the negative in that moment. And we know how much more alluring, How much more easily we get attached to that negative image, Right? The positive image will get a little bit lost in it for a bit, But we'll spend hours on the unworthy image. And it's why so many people are walking around still in spiritual circles with this unworthy image of ourselves. I'm not as good a meditator, I'm not as good a Buddhist, I'm not as good a spiritual person, Still carrying these images around. And so for Alice, You went even deeper. I'm so glad to hear that. And you probably noticed there were a couple other questions in there that I added, Because in doing the retreat again, When I went through the questions yesterday, I thought, Oh, I could add a couple more. So every time, Even just doing the same thing, The same theme, We can always find a little bit more, And I can always find it as well. There are countless disguises that the ego has to get us trapped, Countless disguises. And different conditions, We become aware of others. And then a week later, We do the same retreat, And it's like, Oh, There were a few more there. Great. Now you know what they are. Great. You can be on the lookout for them. Yeah, Moj, I appreciate you saying that. Yeah, That we're so used to having them, It's hard to imagine living without them. Yeah, And we've so identified that that's who we are. You know, It feels very, While it's freeing in that moment of seeing getting lost in the image and the stress and the striving of it. And there's that initial, At least I find that initial, Oh, The spaciousness is back, The ease is back. But then you go along for a while, And there's this kind of like, Oh, Maybe I should go back. Maybe I should go back to start thinking about myself again, Because I need to plan for something later, Or I need to survive, I need to make sure that my career is on track, Or my job, Or you're, You know, What, Or you're planning a new business or something. And yes, I mean, We do need to plan. And we still have goals, It doesn't mean that we can't have any of these things. The difference is that when we plan for the future, We think about, You got to go to the airport, What are you going to do? You're starting a new business, What do you need to do? You've got a client presentation tomorrow, What do you need to do? Like, No problem having those thoughts about it. But as soon as it turns into, And I'll be so happy when I get the business to this level. And I'll be so happy if everything works and I get to the airport without any problems. And I'll be so happy if I win that new client. The moment we do that, The moment we start attaching to an end result, We're setting ourselves up for suffering. Instead of doing our best in this moment, Doing our best to plan, Doing our best to prepare for your client presentation or starting your new business, But not without, Without the idea that there's a me at the end of it, That's going to be more complete. There's not, There's not. So we've got to keep seeing that so we can pull ourselves back and go, No, It's right here, It's right now, I'm looking in the wrong place. Anytime I think my future, Excuse me, My happiness is in the future, I'm looking in the wrong place. So it just, Moj, It, It's, It's a practice. You just, You keep practicing and you keep noticing how much more fluid you feel because you are fluid, Always changing, Every part of you. The more that you get more comfortable with that, And it's why in the meditation, And I think one or two of the questions as well, We're focused on that feeling of presence, That feeling of being here and now, Right? That feeling of openness, Of spaciousness. So we start to get more familiar with that versus the images and really coming in and starting to trust this more and go, Yeah, This feels better, This feels better. And again, Ironically, You are your best. So whatever it is that you're doing, You're doing your best in that moment, But not because there's an image that's, That's, I'm weighing, You know, Dangling in front of myself to get to some happiness. It's just do your best, Of course, Do your best in this moment, Whatever you're doing, Do your best. And feel, Notice the spaciousness and the ease that comes from just doing your best without being attached to a result, Without being attached to an image that's going to, That's going to suddenly be happy, Realized, Enlightened when you get to the other side of this, Because you won't, You won't. Every time we plan for the future, All that happens, We get there. And maybe it turned out great, What you were planning and, And you feel a few moments, Maybe a few minutes, Depending upon what it was of release, Of happiness, Right, Of joy, Not because of achieving something. While there's actually, I should say, Sorry, A little bit of that in there. But really what feels so good is for a few moments, You stopped striving to be something else. You got somewhere. And so you put aside the striving to be something because you would imagine once I get there, I'll be happy. And so in the absence of create, Of an image any longer, You feel a sense of peace, A sense of ease, But then you start it right back up again, Very quickly, Because all you've been doing is conditioning yourself to believe that happiness is out there in front of me. And so that's what you, We've been training ourselves for. So it's like, Okay, Well now it's over there. I got here and we just keep moving the goalpost. So it's a practice, Majj. It's a practice. And the more mindful that you can be of the images, So hopefully in the, In the personal retreat time, You identified some of the images that are most familiar to you right now, Those good images, And you've identified the negative that's associated with them, That hopefully you catch it more quickly and you go, Ah, There you are, I see it. Breathe, Slow down, Come back into your body, Look around here, And notice the difference in how you feel every time you do this. Now, New conditioning, New conditioning. So just practice, Practice. So Sandy, You've always seen yourself as an athlete, And you want to drop the need to win. So I pictured myself as an old man getting away from the girlfriends to ski on the trails and get some peace. Well, Don't picture yourself as anything, First of all. And yeah, And the need to win. When you win, Enjoy winning, Right? Nothing wrong with that. But the need to win, Yeah, I mean, Who needs to win? Who needs to win, Right? It's this little idea of something up here needs to win. So the days that you don't win, Like, Hey, Someone else got to win today, Good for them, Good for them. Now you're practicing sympathetic joy, One of the four Brahma Viharas in Buddhism, Where we share in another person's joy. I can feel joy that you won, But if I have to win it, If it always has to be me, And I didn't win, Well, I sure as heck can't be happy that you won, Because now I perceive that you took something from me. So even just, There's a, Even instead of seeing yourself as an athlete, Just there's a tendency towards athleticism in Sandy. Great. That's where your tendency, You tend to go, And I think you also play tennis, And so skiing, Like, Yeah, Those are the tendencies, But it's not, Don't see yourself as any one of these things, Because also, What happens when you're no longer to be able to be athletic? Maybe you've hurt yourself, And so you're just not able to ski for a while, Or not able to play tennis, Or not able to run, And then it's very frustrating, Because I see myself as an athlete, And now I'm a wounded athlete, And everything I imagined, All my happiness was wrapped up in that. So again, Anytime we're seeing ourselves as something, You have a tendency towards athleticism. Fantastic. Fantastic. Try not to make an image out of it. And I think, Joanne, You were referring to Libby's about accepting who you are, That's the biggest thing you've been dealing with this year. Yeah, And to not try and fix anything. I mean, How many years have we spent in our lives trying to fix who we are? And we never, All we end up with in the end is still, Oh, I still can't accept myself. I still feel like there's something wrong. I still, Maybe next year, I'll get a little better. Maybe next year, Maybe next month. What about when we let go of that idea that I need to be something other than who I am? Because in all of this fixating on that I need to be something better, We're also at the same time saying there's something wrong with me now. So we exaggerate what we see as our bad qualities. We remember every mindless moment that we've ever had, Every time we judged someone else or judged ourselves, Every time we got jealous or we got angry or we got stressed. And we don't think about all of the good things that we've done as well. And there's nothing wrong with reflecting on, Yeah, It's nice that there, It's nice that there was that inclination for generosity there. Don't get caught up in an image, But yeah. And all of these ways in which we're really living our lives in a way that is much more compassionate and wise, But we overlook all that because we're kind of making a case for no, There's something here I can't accept. And you have to accept every part of you. Being whole doesn't mean just accepting the good parts. It means accepting, I also make mistakes. We endlessly say this. I say this on so many calls. We all make mistakes and we go, Yep, Yep, Yep. And doesn't it feel good to think, Yes, I can be human, But then we make a mistake. And because it doesn't live up with our image of our new and improved version of us. And in fact, It really gives a lot of validity to this version of me that's never going to get any better. And then we have a meltdown or not even a meltdown, But we just, We carry around the heavy weight of the unworthy image for a few hours because I made a mistake, Because I said the wrong thing, Because I had a mindless moment. I remembered something incorrectly. Yeah, We all do. We all do. And it is about loving those parts of us as well and laughing, Laughing. Like I do, You laugh, You've got to laugh at yourself. You know, If we're not hurting anyone and it's like, Yes, I stumbled and I fell. I had a mindless moment. Laugh, Laugh at it because it's part of the experience. Why do we want to be punitive to ourselves for being human? That we can't accept who we are. No one's ever going to be perfect. There's no such thing as perfection. And this idea of not accepting ourselves, That something's wrong with me, It is so self-limiting, And it is so painful, And it is so misplaced. It doesn't benefit us in any way. So, The idea of accepting ourselves, You know, Is usually again, You know, Is saying like, Just accepting how I am at this moment, This moment. And then five minutes from now, Accepting who I am in this moment, Right? Whether it's with a mistake, Whether it's with something good that happened, Something good that came out of the mouth. Yeah, It doesn't matter either one, Right? If some praise comes in, Enjoy it. Yeah, It's nice to feel some praise, No problem, Right? It's a good social cue, We've done something good, That's good, Right? Some criticism comes in, Right? Breathe into the feelings of it, Right? We're not trying to be robots that we shouldn't feel. Of course, Some criticism hurts, Right? We feel it, That's okay. It's okay to feel it. The reason the criticism normally is so debilitating for us is because all of a sudden, It's like, Yep, They see that unworthy image of me too. Yep. Yep, This is proof that they're seeing it too. Instead of acknowledging, Yeah, There's just, There's a feeling here of some criticism, It hurts. And I can be with it. I can breathe into it. It's okay. It'll pass. Can't have praise without criticism, Can't have gain without loss, Can't have pleasure without pain, Can't have fame without disrepute. Everyone experiences the eight worldly wins, And really there's 100 worldly wins. Always changing. It's not about staying on one side of it, Because you can't have one without the other. So anytime we're making an image, I should only win, I should only be comfortable, I should only be praised, People should only see me in a good light. We're setting ourselves up for suffering. That's all we are doing. And missing the reality of this ever-changing experience that sometimes feels pleasant and sometimes feels a little unpleasant, For the most part, The bulk of the experience for most of our lives is just mundane moments. Just mundane moments, Which we tend to think of as unpleasant. But when you don't see it through that lens, When you're not carrying some image, I've got to get somewhere else because this is a mundane moment, What you experience is a lot more joy. Because in those mundane moments, There are so many little moments of joy in there that we miss, Because we're so locked into, I got to get over there. Yeah, Just any image, We're looking in the wrong place. We're looking in the wrong place. So, Oh Libby, That was quite insightful. Causes and conditions, The things that gave you the ideals of what we are meant to be. Yeah, Our culture, Our society gave us these ideas of what we should be, Right? Very competitive individualistic society in the West, Need to be famous, Need to be beautiful, Need to be rich, Right? These are the things that our society reveres. And of course, All of that has been, Is part of our conditioning. So yeah, We see that too. If I'm not, Oh, I got to be better, I got to get ahead. And again, Well, Then now I'm going to take it into spirituality and be competitive there. I've got to be more spiritual. I've got to be more realized. Yeah, So it's our society. And anyone that's doing that, Anyone that's playing that game is not winning. It may appear like they're winning at times in the external, But they're just like the little the little mouse on the wheel, Spinning and spinning around, Never getting where it wants to go and missing the whole experience. Okay, So Alice, Good question. Does the ego also create egoic images about the other people in our lives? Yeah, When it's judging other people, Yeah. It's not seeing things clearly, Right? When we look at someone else and we make up some story about them, That's just another image, Our image making up a story about an image about someone else. I mean, This is the thing too, With these stories, With thinking, Is that that's how, Like, We don't realize the stories, The thoughts, That's how the images appear, That there's something behind the stories, Just thinking about ourselves, Thinking. It's like, Who's thinking? There is no thinker there, But that's what we imagine. We imagine there's a doer, We imagine there's a controller, Because of the way that we're thinking. And so, Yeah, And also thinking about other people. Yeah, We're creating little images about them. We're not seeing them clearly. We're seeing, If we're seeing them through the lens of the ego, We are most likely, Actually, We are, We are for sure judging them negatively. The ego is not looking through with compassion, I'll tell you that. Oh, So you added seven more to the eight from last week. Your ego has been very busy. Yeah, Yeah, Yeah. I mean, There's a lot of images. It's so ingrained in us, As Libby was saying, Like our society. And it's so ingrained. I mean, I can remember even just the silly little, This is a silly kind of example, But I'd use this, And Libby, You'll remember from the sangha group we had many years ago. I'd use this as an example, As an ego image. And I was on the phone with a friend helping them with, It was just some kind of problem they were having with some, I think it was a Verizon or something like that. And I said, Well, Let's call them together, And I'll kind of help you through it. She was a little bit confused. So we called them, And we were on the phone with the customer service person, And asking them, And then the customer service person's like, Okay, Let me put you on hold, I'm going to kind of take a little look into this. And I can't remember, Something had come out of it that I thought, Oh, Actually, Now I know what's going on. And I was racing, I remember actually racing to get my computer, I was like, Oh, I got to get my computer down quickly, Because I think I know the problem. And it was this racing to get the answer, Because I wanted to be seen as the one that was more competent. And in that, It was just a split second of realizing like, Like I can remember, I was reaching down for my computer from something and almost dropped it, Because I was like, I've got to get it. And then realizing, Oh, My God, Who cares who got it? Like, Whether she gets it, Or I got it, Like, Like, But you can see all these little ways that the ego sneaks out, And just creates this image of who we think we are, You know, Just little, Little subtle ways. But it creates, I mean, It could have dropped my computer and broken it. But also like, For what, Like all this stress, And I've got to show I know more than the customer service person, Like, It's, It's really, Like, We're so under its control. In that moment, We just don't realize even what it's doing to us. I don't realize it's, It's, It's so delusional. And yeah, So Andy's saying the impressionist artists thrived on imperfections. Yeah, We always think like, If something goes wrong, Or there's a like an imperfection or something that that means it's bad, We're so quick, The ego so quick to impute bad, Right? Because it always wants to live in this very binary world, It's good or bad. And we're always so quick, A plan doesn't go the way we think, We get something that really good happened to us, Right? Or we perceive it's like, Oh, My God, It's amazing. This is fantastic. And then later, We realize, Oh, My God, That was the worst thing that ever happened, Or you end up getting fired from a job. And you're thinking this is the worst thing that ever happened. And then later that day, Or a week later, You meet someone and you end up getting your dream job. And you're like, That was actually the best thing that ever happened. And so that's the thing, Too. It's just we're always in flux. Like, But we're so quick to say good, Bad versus well, Let's see. Let's see what happens. Don't make an image out of it. Let's see. It's always changing. Always, Always changing. There's the story, Probably you guys know this, And I've said it a few times, The story of the old Chinese farmer, Whose horse goes missing one day. And he was a very poor farmer. And he used this horse to help him plow the fields. And all the villagers heard about the fact that his horse had taken off. And they come around, They're like, Oh, My God, Such bad luck. This is so horrible. This is so bad. And he just says, Well, We'll see. And then a few days later, The horse comes back, And there's this magnificent stallion with him. And, And so all the villagers hear about this. And they all come rushing over like this. What amazing good luck. Now you have two horses to plow your fields. This is what good fortune. You are so lucky. And the old farmer just says, Well, We'll see. And then a few days later, His young son was, Was breaking in the new stallion. And he ends up getting thrown off the horse and he breaks his leg. And all the villagers hear about this. They all come over. Oh, My God, What terrible luck this is. That horse was such bad luck. Oh, You poor thing. We'll see. And a few days later, This is the last one. A few days later, The Chinese army is coming through and they're conscripting, Conscripting all of the young able-bodied men. And because the boy's leg was broken, He couldn't go off to the war. All the villagers thought, What good fortune. And this is, You know, We're so quick to want to say something is good or bad. We don't know. We don't know. Feel what's there. If there's some disappointment, If you got fired, You get, You know, Broken up, Like whatever, Feel what's here, Be with what's here in our experience. But it won't last. It won't last. And it's, You know, Whatever is up must come down. Right. And it's just always changing. But we grasp onto it as though there was something here. So there's a little image of me that I can get to, Sorry, There's an image I can get to that I could land somewhere and have everything be perfect. But because we are an ever-changing interdependent arising, There is nothing here that could possibly land. It's just always changing, Always changing. It's been our experience our whole life. And it will always be because that is the absolute reality, Is that we're always changing. There is nothing here that there is nothing out there that I could possibly hold on to, But there is nothing here that could hold on to it. But we try and do it in our thoughts, That we try and do it in our thoughts. We imagine we're holding on to something, We're attached to it, We're grasping at it, And we don't see how much suffering we're causing for ourselves in that moment, How painful it is to wish to be something other than who I am right now, To be so attached to this idea that I'm unworthy, That I'm not enough. And yet it's all just thoughts, Just thoughts that have become so real to us, This image of ourselves so real in our minds. And yet this image of myself has never existed. There is just a being here that is arising and changing moment by moment, Not nothing, Not a thing, Not a thing, Just constantly changing. Yes, Stephanie, As you're saying, When we stand back, There is so much going on in our world, Just take every breath and love the simple stuff. An excellent point, Because we do think, Again, So much of our life is mundane moments. We have on either end, The really pleasant moments, We're getting praise, We've just finished some big project, You got some recognition, You got a book deal, Like something kind of the party, The holiday, Right, You know, You've kind of got these fun things up here. And on the other end, Of course, We get the disappointment that happened, We get the criticism, We get the loss, You know, We lost money in the market or on that investment, We lost someone that we love, Like we have that on the other side, But the majority of our experience is really mundane moments. And when I say mundane, Just they're neither pleasant nor unpleasant, They're just mundane, Just kind of going about our day, Just running our errands, Cleaning the house, Cleaning our body, Feeding the dogs, Preparing the meals, Doing the grocery shopping, Going to the bank, Paying the bills. Like, It's just these kind of moments that what we perceive as mundane moments, Just neither pleasant nor unpleasant. And yet, When you really pay attention, There is so much going on. But we look at it as well, It's not pleasant, Because we think every moment is supposed to be firecrackers, And highs and excitement. So anything that's not that, We look at it as this is bad. This is boring, Everyone else's life is so exciting. And let me just go on social media, Which distorts everyone's world so dramatically. Oh, Look at everyone else's highlight reel, See, Everyone else is living the life. And I'm sitting here on my sofa, Which, Again, Social media just distorting people are just putting up their highlight reel, They're not putting out that when they're sitting on the sofa, Nothing going on, Or when they're waiting in line at the bank or in the long line at the grocery store. Right, We see these little snippets. And of course, All the images that we see through media, Like, You know, How excited everyone is, And they're all on the beach, And they're drinking Coca Cola, And they're so happy, Or they're off on this holiday, Or they're getting the new phone, Or they're getting this new car. And all of these images do have an impact on us, Where we think if I'm not super excited, If something super exciting isn't going on, Then something must be wrong. But that's not looking at reality, It doesn't matter who you are. I mean, Movie stars have to sit around and wait for their turn on the set. A lot of sitting around and waiting for them, It seems like their life's always supposed to be exciting. It's not, It doesn't matter who you are. This is everyone's experience. But in those moments that are neither pleasant nor unpleasant, When you're looking without imputing, Boringness on this, Nothing going on, How does this reflect on me, My life sucks, I'm such a loser, When you're not doing that, Right? Instead, You're looking, And you're hearing, And you're feeling. There's a richness in the aliveness of this moment. And that's what we want to touch more into, Into that feeling of it, The feeling of presence, To really ride the wave of that energy. Because there is an energy that we're, That when we're not fighting back reality, And when we're willing to be open to what is here, To be looking, Not looking for something, But looking instead, There is a shift in our nervous system that gets very much in sync with the harmony of what's going on, And it feels good. It feels pleasant. And so more getting in touch with that as well. And that was one of the questions that I put on the journal prompts was, You know, Are you familiar with this? I think there are a lot of people that aren't really that familiar with the feeling of it. And if so, If that's the case, Then just to recognize that and say, I've got to practice more. I've got to get practice more in getting in touch with this. Going out in nature, Nature is a wonderful place for us to get in touch with this. When you hear a bird singing, Or you, The leaves of the trees fluttering as the wind goes by, And the warmth of the sun on your face, And you're truly open, You're not making some image out of it, You're truly open. There's this, It's like our nervous system, The energy is just in sync with this flow of life, This aliveness. And it's not up here like on a, On a, You know, Chocolate cake kind of level. It's a, It's a steadiness. It's a steadiness. And there's, There is in that also the recognition that we are a part of this, That we're not separate from any of this, That we're a part of this, Because that's what you're also tapping into. Every time we create an image of ourselves, And again, Shifting our nervous system, Because we're getting very stressed and uptight about the image, And separating ourselves into two, And separating ourselves from the universe as though it's something different, As though the universe is different from us. How could that possibly be? How could that possibly be? We are the universe, Expressing itself as Stephanie, As Jacqueline, As Sandy, As Monica, As Libby, Not separate, A part of. So there's something that we also, If we're not tapping into it, If we're not able to feel that flow, Then just to recognize that, And to really make more of an effort to I need to, And I do think spending time in nature, And even just in your meditation practice. So in your meditation practice, And I have a lot of meditations about really kind of tapping into the energy. But in your meditation, If you're just doing a simple mindful meditation, Your attention is on the breath. Once you notice there is a pleasant feeling that's arising, Focus your attention on the feeling, Right? Ride the wave of joy that's here. These are the Buddha's instructions. This is how we get into those deeper, Into the jhanas, Into samadhi, Right? Take your attention off the breath, Come into the feelings, The pleasant feelings, The feeling of joy, Of bliss, Of that delightful energy. Focus your attention there, And ride the wave of that. Notice how it changes your meditation experience. And so really also recognizing that we're, Because we are very disembodied to begin with, But even at a more subtle level, Even on a spiritual path, I think there's many people that are still a bit disembodied from this energy. And when you're more familiar with how to feel it, That's more of your inclination. It's not nothing going on, I'm standing in line. And maybe it's just you're doing a little loving kindness or tonglen for the people around, And then there's that feeling and you're like, Yeah. Or you're just paying attention going, Wow, Look at all these people, We're all here together right now. This is amazing how we all ended up here at this particular moment. Yeah, You know, You're hearing the different sounds, You're feeling what's going on, You're looking, You're seeing, And it's like there's a richness, My God, Look at all these people, We're all just here right now. How did this happen? There's so much more wonder and awe in seeing the world in the way that it really is arising in each moment and a feeling that goes with that. But I think even with the mindful breathing, There's maybe something that's just a little bit still not quite tapping into it. So if that's, And again, I put that on the journal prompts, If that's, You know, Be honest with yourself, If you're not really tapping into that, If you're not really sure of what that feeling is, Then to do more practice, Go out in nature, In your meditation, Switch from the breath to the feelings once they arise, Get more in touch with it, Get more familiar. So making that a little bit more of a specific practice, Because that will be a valuable practice for you. Yeah, I'm just gonna, And I'll pop back in a minute. And hi, Jacqueline, Good to see you. But Sandy's saying, Yeah, The studies done on people watching social media produces anxiety. I have a little bug here. That's why I'm doing that. Just kind of gently pushing him to the side. It does create, I mean, You can do social media. I get that there's some benefits to it, As far as being in contact with old friends. It's great in that respect. And, You know, Just that you know, You can go to Facebook Messenger and pull up someone that you, You know, That I used to live with in Australia, Or I know from the monastery, There was someone from London, Because I have lived all over the world. And it's just great, That kind of reference places, Just like, You know, It's there, You know, It's there. But spending any, I think it's more, And correct me, Sandy, If I'm wrong on this, But I think it's more than like 10 minutes on social media. That's probably too long. Because you can't help getting into that comparing mode. We're not meant to be looking at all of these different images of other people having fun and happiness. And, And that's what everyone's putting out, Of course, Right? They're not putting out all their boring moments. And our little lizard brain can't handle that. And all of a sudden, The comparing goes on, And then I'll look at me and my life sucks. Right? I mean, This is what happens. And that just, You know, We're seeing people's, Oh, Look, They just got married, They just had a grandson, They just got promoted, They just got this new car. It's seeing all that at once, Like that is just not meant, That's not how we're wired to take in that amount of information at once. It's not healthy for us. So social media, You know, While I think there's some benefit for it there, It's just dangerous. It's dangerous. And we should know that we should know that about it. It's dangerous. And where Joanne saying, If you post about a tough time in your life, And no, Or maybe no one responds or something like, Because it is you're, We're looking, Even all the influencers, You know, This. They sometimes will see him on the beach here. I mean, We have a beautiful beach down here in Mexico. And sometimes you'll see like an influencer there, And they're trying to get their right shot. And then they go and look at the photo and that wasn't it. And they're going back again. And they're looking again, They're trying to get that right shot. And that that just that that perfect angle. And you can see all the going back and forth trying to get it, Which is so fake, Because that little image right minute ago, They're frustrated, Okay, This time, I better get it. And then once they post, And of course, I don't see them, They're doing it. But you can imagine there's this constant got how many likes did I get? How many comments did I get? Right? Just this? Oh, My God, I didn't get enough. I last time I got 10 likes now. And this now I've only got seven likes. And then we're measuring our self worth based on that. Talk about images. Yeah, And it's this interest in the fake beauty and the filters that everyone's putting on and, And all of this, Like, It's not a real world. It's definitely these algorithms are specifically designed to make us mind less. Because if I'm mindless, And they're tracking my eyeballs, And they're kind of knowing how long before I'm going to go off on something before I'm going to maybe do a comment or how long I'm going to leave the system leave the platform, They know the exact point to get you to put an ad in front of you. She's just that mindless now. Now we put the little ad for such and such, We've primed her with all these different things. And now we're going to put the ad. And that's how they make money. Right? They make us mindless. And then we purchase things that we don't need. And then we get it. And it's like, Okay, I felt good for a moment. And now I'm back to I don't feel good about myself anymore. So if we're trying to be mindful, If we're trying to be present, Then social media is definitely not the place for us. Yeah. I mean, Moderation, As you're saying, Stephanie. Yeah. But I mean, Really, I mean, It's, It's addicting. And don't think that you're smarter than the algorithms, You're not. You're not. They have programmers, They're dopamine hacking, They know, You know, They know what they're doing, Trying to take over your attention, Because that's their job is to keep your attention on their, Their platform. And don't think that you're smarter than the algorithms. So generally speaking, I mean, I think social media has, I mean, And I know some people like they say, Oh, No, No, They really like it. It's like, Okay. And I'll post once a week or so on my merit on my like, Kind of meditation teachers page, And I still have my personal page. And maybe sometimes I'll post maybe there's a lost dog, Or we've tried to adopt out a dog or something along those lines, Or, Or I've got a class coming up, But I don't go on there much, I'll put it on and I don't go back, You know, Or at least for a week. So you've got to be very careful with social media, Talk about creating negative images. And I just want to go back, Because I think, So Michelle, Where you're saying non-identification and non-judgment, Just, I can't remember, It was five minutes ago. But definitely a good practice of not identifying with anything and not judging, Not judging. Every time we judge someone else, We judge ourselves. Right? If I'm judging myself, I'm making a negative image. If I'm judging someone else, I'm making a negative image about them. And all that's happening is I'm closing up my heart. And I have no compassion, No compassion in that moment. And if I have no compassion, I have no wisdom. Right? It's just, You know, Judging others, Judging ourselves. I mean, Who are we to judge someone? And again, Who are we to even judge ourselves? I made a mistake, Did the wrong thing. If you did something that was really unkind or really uncaring, Like, Yeah, Okay, Now you've woken up and you've realized what's happened, Go back and apologize, Fix what you can, Don't beat yourself up, Don't judge yourself negatively, Recognize the conditions that maybe how this arose, You were getting, Maybe you spent too much time on social media, And you were a little too stressed, You had a little too many things going on, Recognize the conditions, Yeah, That were happening, That's a good idea. So that you can remember, Like, Yeah, I've got to slow down a bit. This path, The conditions for this path are most conducive to a simple life, Not wanting for a lot, Not wanting more than what it is that you need. The more wanting, The more wanting, The more you desire, The more you desire, It doesn't lead to the end. And instead, More just appreciating of what you have and not stacking your schedule in a way where you're running from one thing to the next, Because the busier you are, The busier your mind is. There's just no way around it. And if we really, Truly want deep inner peace, Lasting inner peace, Contentment, Connection, Freedom, If this is what we really want, Then slow down. It's all right here. It's all right here. So it's really, It's good for us to also, In these personal retreats, And by the way, Thank you, Stephanie, For the donation, Thank you. In these personal retreats, It's good for us to slow down and examine our lives. How are we living our lives? Are our actions aligned with our intentions? Are we saying yes too much to things because we don't want to offend anyone, Because we're afraid of missing out, Because we're afraid of what they will think of me, Right? Or are we able to recognize that I'm being pulled in too many directions, The first thing that's going to go is your peace of mind? So as to be honest, In monastic life, Renunciation is a big part of monastic life. And we tend to look at this in the West as something bad, Giving up things. But really, When we're practicing renunciation, It's about giving up something that's no longer serving me. And in its place, Having our attention, Our focus, More directed towards that which is. So whether we're a monastic or a lay person, If our intention, If we're very clear about what it is that we want, Deep, Lasting inner peace, Freedom, Connection, Contentment, If we're very clear about what it is that we want, Then we do want to make sure that we're doing the best that we can with the life that we have. I get that some people have kids, Have other responsibilities, Have other commitments, And it's difficult, Right? You have to work within the parameters of your particular life. But I think we can all always put a little bit more effort into simplifying somewhere. Even if it's just, Don't shop on Amazon for a month. It's too easy, Especially that something can be here the next day. Well, Not down here in Mexico, It takes about three weeks. And a 33% tariff on top of it. So that's just because of the shippers coming down. Probably worse now with the tariffs, I don't even know what they've done to the prices of things coming down. But it's just too easy that we think, I want that. And how many times have we done that? Because it's so easy, We can just type it in. Oh, Look, There it is. I didn't have to go from store to store. I didn't have to search through all these malls and all these different stores, Which we used to have to do when we wanted some obscure item. We had to really work for it. But now it's just, Oh, Type it in, And now it's here, Right? And then we do it again, And again, And again. The more that we want, Just the more that we want. We're not coming to the cessation of wanting, We're just adding on more wanting. And so every time we can even think about that wanting, That kind of wanting something outside of us, I'll be more complete if I can get that new outfit, If I can get that new piece of furniture, If I can get that new rug, If I can get those new mala beads, Right? Because remember, That will make me look much more spiritual. And no judgment there, I've done it, So no judgment. But, You know, The more that we're doing this, Like what we're not doing then is appreciating what it is that we do have, And appreciating most of all the good conditions that we have for practice. Because most of us have good conditions. If on a Friday afternoon or a Saturday morning in Australia, New Zealand, You have the time to be doing a half-day retreat, You have good conditions. They won't always be this way. They won't. I mean, We're seeing what's happening in the Middle East, And I mean, Things are getting, You know, Things seem more uncertain now than ever. They always are, But they seem that way more now. We shouldn't waste the good conditions that we have. They're so precious. And all this wanting, It's not preparing us for tough times. It's not helping us. It's just adding to more want. Yeah, Want it now, Exactly as Joanne, As you put that in caps, I want it now, Right? Can't wait till tomorrow. Okay, Let me go back to a couple other… Oh, And Janine, You found out a friend passed away on social media. That's a tough way to find out. That's a tough way to find out. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Yeah, It is a way, I mean, I have to admit, When my mother passed in April, I did, In fact, Libby, My sister who's on here, She had said to me, She's like, Oh, You should put it on mommy's Facebook page to let people know, So I was able to use her phone, And and post on her page. And, And yeah, Now, Like, Oh, I mean, That is how I let a lot of people know. There were also a lot of beautiful comments that had come in, Which were wonderful to read. I mean, Tears, You know, Just all, My mom was a really amazing person and had such a big impact on so many people. But it was a way to let a lot of people know because she was a professor, And she impacted so many people that were now spread out around the country, Around the world. But yeah, But also then a tough way to find out. So I'm sorry for that. I'm sorry, Janine, That that's how you found out. Yeah, It was Libby, Wasn't it? I mean, It's unbelievable what people had written and shared. Yeah. You're very welcome, Sandy. And you're saying Canada has a travel advisory. Probably a travel advisory not to come to the US, I would think. I'm not sure, But. Oh, Thanks for my Peter. Hey, Peter, Good to see you. Yeah, So I have a talk on this. Yeah, On called Welcome to Holland. Actually, That's probably not the title of the talk. I think the title is appreciating the life you have. Because we have this tendency to just keep comparing ourselves endlessly, And I should be this. And instead of like appreciating what we have now, Not comparing to someone else. You're having Peter's having Peter's experience. Stephanie's having Stephanie's experience. Janine, Each of us is having our own unique experience. We have pleasant conditions. We have unpleasant conditions. And we have a lot of stuff in the middle, Just neither pleasant nor unpleasant. Everybody has these kind of this general, I mean, Yes, There are some, Especially if you're in a war zone or something, You're having more, A little more unpleasant. But we all have this mix. And for so many of us that have such good conditions, Right, We don't, We don't spend nearly enough time appreciating all the conditions that we have, Being grateful for what it is that's here right now. And thank you, Michelle. Thank you for the donation. Yeah, Stephanie, I was with her right up actually to the very last breath. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, We experience unpleasant conditions, And we lose people that we love. That's part of life. And, You know, I did the series on the five remembrances. And this is what the Buddha said we should think about every day. Also, We should reflect, I am of the nature to grow old, I cannot escape growing old. I am of the nature to get sick, I cannot escape getting sick. I am of the nature to die, I cannot escape death. Everything that is dear to me and everyone that I love is subject to change, I cannot escape being separated from them. My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are my continuum. And while this can sound very morose to a non-insight timer group, Why would you want to think about that you're getting old, That you could get sick, That you could die, That you could lose people? Because it helps you appreciate where you are right now. It helps you appreciate those that you love right now. When I gave this talk, It was last December. So I think we were on the fourth remembrance, It was last December. My mom had just arrived down here, She was here for the winter. And I talked about how I don't take for granted any moment that I have with her. I didn't take one mundane moment for granted. You know, I didn't know I only had about five months left with her. But it teaches us to remember and that, Yes, I am getting old. I'm 60 years old. Yes, There's age spots. Yes, It's, You know, Not as, You know, When you're 60, You're not like you were when you were 20. But I also recognize that, You know what, These hands with all the age spots and the wrinkles and the wrinkles that are all here. Yeah, Because there's been a life lived here. There's a lot of memories, There's a lot of experiences. And when I remember I'm supposed to, That I will get sick, I don't freak out when I'm sick, Because of course I will get sick. It's part of life. It's not to push back on it, But it's part of life. And when I remember that I'm of the nature to die, I don't forget to live now. I don't forget to live now. And when I remember that the only thing, My only belonging is my actions, I make sure those actions are wise. Because I cannot escape the consequences of those actions. And whatever action happens here, There's a consequence. That's the continuum. And every mindful breath is a beautiful action. So, You know, When we think about, You know, Things like the five remembrances, It's not to be morose, But it's just to remember life has ups and downs. And we just always assume these things like, We always assume I have so much time, I have so much time, You know, Peace, Freedom, Contentment, I'll focus on that next week. In summer, That'll be better, I'll have less things going on. No, Next winter, Next year, When I go on that long retreat, I'll focus on it then. We're always putting it off, Because we think we have endless amounts of time. And we don't. We don't. One day, This is going to be over like that. Like that. Right? It's so quick. It's so quick. It's like this. There's this beautiful, So a lot of the, Well, This one particular cactus that I have. You know, We have a lot of cactus here in the desert. It blooms this beautiful flower, I'll send it to you later, Libby. Unbelievably beautiful flower that it went out yesterday, It came out, And then it dies the next day. So my gardener had mentioned to me about a week ago, He's like, Oh, Look, It's about to flower. And it did, It had a few of them. And then I was going to take a picture of it, And it was gone the next day. It shriveled up. And he's like, Oh, Yeah, They only last for one day. And it is a spectacular flower. Beautiful, A huge, Big flower, And then shriveled up. And it just reminded me this morning as I was looking at it now shriveled up. It's so quick. We have this amazing life, This full life. And it's over in a nanosecond. And we take it for granted. And we take it for granted. So we shouldn't take any conditions for granted. If we have the good conditions now, And you really, Truly do want freedom, If you're really clear on that, The peace, Contentment, Connection, Love, Universal love, Not romantic love, Not that there's anything wrong with romantic, But I mean, Again, Focusing on what it is that's most precious to us, Then make sure that your actions are aligned with your intention. And this will be a good place we'll segue into, You know, Adding more retreats, Personal retreats into our lives. As I think Janine or a couple, Or no, Sandy, You had said, And Alice, You had said as well, Like these types of settings do allow us to go deeper into our practice, Into our understanding, Into seeing where we're going, Getting led astray. And I am going to try to do one retreat a month, One half day retreat like this. So Sundays for people, You know, In the States, And then I'll always try and do one in Australia so that we have so Friday afternoon here, Saturday morning for you guys. So that we can keep going deeper. So we'll still do the Sunday Sangha as we're going to do on Sunday with the Dharma talk and meditation. But to do these half day retreats where we can really keep going deeper. But you can also do these on your own, You can add in more time, I think the more that you're thinking in that way of where can I add more retreats into my life, The more you start to do it. So in the morning, If you can do, I do almost every morning, I have a two hour retreat to start my morning. And in the first hour is meditation, There's a little mindful movement. And then I take my cup of tea and I go sit outside. And I'll do a little writing. And I'll put the writing down, I'll just listen to the birds and I'll look around, Maybe read, I might read just a paragraph or two of something, Think about it, Right. And really to take that time to not just, It's not just the meditation, Which is incredibly important. But it's a continuation where any insights that came to me in the meditation, I can write a little bit about, I can think about, I can contemplate, I can really absorb what it is, Not just kind of move on to the next thing. And it's such a shift in your day. And it's also because when I started saying, Okay, This is my retreat time, It's two hours, It wasn't then, Okay, Well, Now I'm going to end at this time, Just like I'm done. Like, No, It's got to be two hours from when I started meditating. So I, Okay, I still got 15 minutes, Like, Okay, Let's just sit for a little bit longer. Let's do some walking meditation. I have to admit, I don't do a schedule for that, That retreat. It's just something that I've been doing and doing. And then I finally realized, I'm like, Oh, This is kind of my retreat time. So, So we can do something like that in the morning. And that may not work for your schedule, You might have kids, Or you've got to get up and go to a job really early. But maybe in the evening, That you can say once a week, Or once every two weeks, That maybe you get home at five o'clock, And you say, I'm going to do a two hour retreat. And I'm going to meditate, Do some mindful movement, Go for a mindful walk in nature, Do some journaling, Do a little studying, Not reading, Not sitting down and reading a Dharma book. I don't consider that retreat time. But reading a paragraph or two, Thinking about it, How does that apply to your life? What do you understand in there? And you can, And when you tell yourself, Versus heading home and saying, Yeah, I think I'll do a little extra meditation tonight, I got off a little bit earlier. As soon as you say it's your retreat time, It becomes very sacred. There's just something about it that we're more like, Oh, It's my retreat time. And we tend to follow it a little bit more. We're a little more disciplined with it, Because we said, Oh, It's my retreat time. So in the evening, You know, To do a little retreat time to, You know, To find times when we can do a half day on your own, Do a two hour on a Saturday, Or a three hour on a Saturday on your own, Really sticking to that schedule, Particularly if you're especially if you're new, Definitely have a schedule. And even anything I'm doing over two hours, Like my morning routine is pretty set. So I'm pretty clear on what I'm doing in there. But if I'm doing a half day on my own, A full day or two day, I have a schedule. A schedule is everything, Is everything. So definitely make sure that you have your schedule of what you're doing. You don't have to be rigid about it, But you want it to have, You don't want to be thinking, Wow, Well, That was enough. I think I'm good now. Let me just kind of, Let me just go on. It just keeps you to it like, Okay, That's next, That's next, That's next. I mean, You can move some things around, But you do want to have that schedule. And, And just to look for those times that you can be adding it in. I mean, I wouldn't say anything less than two hours is probably, Might be hard to call that a retreat. I mean, Try and let me know what your thoughts are. But I generally, I generally think two hours is kind of the, That's a, That's a retreat. You can, You can qualify it as a personal retreat. So yeah, Just getting more retreats into your, Into your day, Maybe have a theme. Maybe you notice you've been doing a lot of judging that week. You've been doing a lot of comparing that week. So you can think, Okay, My retreat is going to be on sympathetic joy because I'm, I'm getting a lot of envy. I'm getting a lot of jealousy. I need to really focus on how to share in the joy of others not feeling left out. So again, You can recognize like what's happening in your mind and think I need to spend a little bit more time with the antidote. So I want to do the sympathetic joy meditation. I want to do a little bit of journaling about it. I want to do some reflecting on it because this is where the mind movement is happening. So we can also notice like you've got a difficult person, Do loving kindness or do some tonglen, Right? So thinking about what's going on in your life, What is it that I need that I can just do a little bit, That I can emphasize a little bit more to help free me so that I'm not getting lost in these mind movements for so long, Like they keep coming up. So I better do the practices that help to minimize those mind movements. So you can have a theme. It might just be your theme as I just want to slow down and see, And just see what's here. Like, Great, That's your theme, But just have your schedule, Follow it. And I just don't take the good conditions for granted. We just don't know that we're always going to have them. We just don't know that. I mean, The Buddha said it in his time 2, 500 years ago, And we've had very good conditions for a long time. I mean, It may not last, Even if it's just where, You know, For the first five months of the year, I was back in the States with my mom. All of a sudden, You know, My conditions changed. I was still meditating every day, But I would basically get my morning meditation, And in the evening, Maybe a little bit of journaling, But it was tiring being a caretaker. It was a lot. And it was all the good conditions that I've had before leading up to that, That I didn't take for granted, That allowed me to stay present with what was going on. So don't take your good conditions for granted. Try where you can to start adding some more little mini retreats in your schedule. And we will also keep doing a half day, Once a month, We'll keep doing a half day for us to keep taking some of these topics and going deeper. Okay. And I'm just going to read the last few comments before we wrap up here. Maybe we'll do a short, Maybe two-minute meditation just to close this out, But I just wanted to see Stephanie. Oh, I think you're saying, Oh, I thought you were saying to give a dollar to a person. Okay. I'm not quite sure on that. Oh, And you've copied the suggestions onto your file page so you can refer to it. Great. Great. Oh, To me. Oh, Thank you. That's so sweet of you to say that. Thank you, Stephanie. Thank you. So let's just close out for just a couple of minutes with a meditation just so we can let everything kind of settle in. It's always a nice way to just to finish a Dharma talk, Even if it's just a couple of minutes. And thank you, Stephanie. Thank you. So let's just close our eyes. And just allowing your breath to be natural. Checking in, Noticing how you're feeling. Not pushing back on anything. Just getting closer to what it is that's here in this moment. Feeling that sense of welcoming what's here. Maybe noticing just a little bit of a shift in how you feel when you become aware of what's here and you're open to it. How freeing it is to accept what it is that's here. And bringing your hands together at your heart center in prayer. And taking a moment to dedicate the merit of your practice from your time here today. And we just imagine that we're sharing this merit with someone that we love. This is just a very simple practice of acknowledging and sharing. And when you're ready, You can open your eyes. Okay. So thank you all for being here, For doing this half-day retreat, For taking this time for yourself. Thank you, Donnie and Libby. Thank you. And Stephanie, Thank you so much. And Michelle, And Alice and Peter. And who else? Jacqueline and Sandy and Joanne. And Janine. And I think Chris. I'm just going through the comments because I can't see below who's here. But thank you, Anmoj. And thank you guys for just great comments, Great questions. And oh, Thank you, Michelle. Thank you. And thanks, Anmoj. Thanks, Chris. Yeah, Thanks, You guys. I really am enjoying doing these a little more regularly. So for me, It's ending up twice a month with everyone here, And then just my own personal retreats. So thank you, Guys. I'm really enjoying them as well. So thank you. And so Sunday, We're going to have our regular sangha, Which I had said I was going to do maybe around nine or ten o'clock. But in fact, I'm doing it at noon, Because again, I want to think about people in Australia and New Zealand, My sister, And Chris and Janine and Anmoj and Joanne. So that I know it's 6am for you guys. But so we'll try and keep things around noon. I'll try not to do anything earlier than that. Other than when I do the half day here. Because I wonder if I could just do them starting at noon. No, Because that's still 5pm, 5am for you guys. Yeah, I'll keep, I'll do a morning one here, Kind of US time, North America time. And then I'll try and keep doing just the same one, For those of you in Australia and New Zealand. And yeah, So and then for Michelle and Alice, And for those of you that did last week, So you can come back and do another one. So oh, And thank you, Jacqueline. Thank you so much for the donation. I appreciate it. And yeah, So and Sunday's talk, Just a little heads up is going to be staying with this theme of looking in the wrong place. But now looking in the wrong place to, Or for the solutions to our problems. So I'm going to stay on that theme, But kind of looking at a little bit of a different direction. So yeah, Thanks, You guys. Thanks, Jacqueline. All right. Thank you guys so much. Have a wonderful, Wonderful day, Wonderful evening. And I will see, Hopefully, A lot of you on Sunday. Okay, Namaste.