At Home In My Body Relaxation

We carry the history of our life and trauma in our body and we can use our senses and breath to experience safety and relaxation in the present moment. Breath after breath, we unconsciously signal our nervous system that we are safe and it is okay to relax and soften.

Transcript

As we come into a practice,

It's really good to let our nervous system know where we are.

One of the ways we do that is through our eyes.

Take in cues of safety,

And we also notice that we're not in any danger.

And if you suddenly did see something that was dangerous,

You could trust your nervous system to respond to that.

That negativity bias in the brain is always looking,

Is there anything dangerous to my body,

To my life?

So we can always count on that.

And what's not automatic is noticing safety.

So that's a practice that we can bring in through our eyes,

Through our body.

Even though we're physically safe in this moment,

We carry the residue of our whole life in our body.

So all of the times when we were scared or uncertain,

Those are also here in our body.

So we have these habits often of bracing through the back of our head,

Neck,

And shoulders,

Bracing for trouble,

Bracing for something that's unexpected.

And as we tune into our body,

We might just relax the neck and shoulders,

Those large muscles of the upper back.

And notice,

Actually,

There's no reason to be bracing for trouble right now.

I'm here doing a practice.

So we can rest with some certainty that we'll be safe to do that.

And in addition to resting like that,

We also need to notice.

So that's what we're doing.

We're looking around,

We're tuning into our body.

And as we relax,

For instance,

Our upper back and shoulders,

Let your shoulders move down away from your ears and move them around a little bit,

Then that helps the nervous system to really see on a cellular level,

Energetic,

Unconscious perception of threat or safety.

Another thing we sometimes do is we look behind us.

Look behind you and let your eyes take in the safety beside you and behind you.

And then do the same on the other side.

And again,

We're letting our eyes communicate directly with our nervous system.

We're safe.

And the other big way that our nervous system knows that we're safe is how we're breathing.

So if you were to take some deeper,

Longer breaths,

That would signal to your nervous system that you're safe.

And part of the way that we bring the past into the present is through the history of our nervous system and primitive brain.

If we have a habit of holding our breath or breathing very shallow,

That was reasonable when we were a child or earlier in our adult life when we were in danger.

We were trying to avoid detection by breathing very shallow or by holding our breath.

And when that gets to be the habit of our nervous system and of our body,

Then we're continually signaling to our nervous system that we're not safe.

As you breathe in and breathe out,

Try some deeper breaths.

Let your breath be more continuous,

More ease in your breath.

And that's another nonverbal signal that we're safe.

And if you're breathing more deeply and it feels a little uncomfortable,

It could be that we have this history of not breathing very deeply or of holding our breath so it feels maybe not so certain,

Like that's a good idea.

And we need direct experience.

And that's part of what we do in these practices.

We directly experience that it's okay to breathe more deeply now.

These habits,

These trauma responses and protective mechanisms might have been very necessary at the time.

They're not necessary right now in this moment.

As we let our bodies shift into a more settled,

Confident space that we're safe,

It might take a little while for that message to really be deeply integrated.

And as you're aware of your whole body from head to toes,

Notice any other parts of your body that are tight that you could bring your attention to and let them soften.

Your forehead and eyebrows,

Mouth and jaw,

Neck and shoulders,

The large muscles of the back,

Large muscles of the chest,

Stomach area from the lower ribs through the navel center to the lower belly,

And your shoulders through your arms and hands,

Your hips.

We bring our whole body into awareness.

Even though the body carries a history,

Our experience in the body is right now in this moment.

So it's not a blank slate.

We do carry the history of our physical life,

Our emotional life,

Our trauma history,

And yet our experience of it is fresh and we just tune in.

And we might know something about our history that comes to mind or we might not be thinking about that at all.

It doesn't necessarily matter that we know why our shoulders are up around our ears.

We don't have to be thinking about the specifics of the history.

It's enough just to know our bodies respond to our environment and we carry the history of that in our body.

And we can soften our shoulders,

We can soften our belly,

Let the breath have more ease,

And to do all of that from this moment right now.

And in this way we get to deeply know ourselves,

Including our body.

We also include the thoughts in our mind,

Our emotions,

Our timeline,

Our history.

It's part of getting to know ourselves really deeply.

During a practice we don't need to pay attention to that.

We could just soften our body,

Relax the muscles,

Breathe more deeply,

And that's enough.

And our body becomes so familiar,

Familiar enough that we really notice if something changes.

And we might get impatient with some of those patterns every single time.

I notice my mind wanders off,

I stop breathing,

Whatever it might be.

And then we can practice patience,

Kindness.

We come back to the breath.

Notice how as you're breathing out,

Your belly can soften back towards the spine.

Every time you breathe out,

The whole body softens a bit more.

And over time we become more used to it.

We know our body in a different way and we start to feel more at home in our body.

Notice your response to those words,

I feel at home in my body.

A bunch of thought might come in.

There might be a reaction or a response in terms of tightening up somewhere.

You might think about some part of your body that you don't like or how you've been disconnected from your body for a long time.

And all of that is part of our relationship with the body,

That's true.

I feel at home in my body.

Continue to notice your breath.

The breath is so reliable.

We breathe over 20,

000 times a day and each one of those times our body wants to soften and relax.

We have a lot of opportunity to signal our nervous system by the way we breathe.

And when we do these practices,

We experience how our nervous system settles,

We feel safer,

Our whole body starts to relax and soften.

And that really helps the mind,

The thought stream,

To become less alarmed,

Feel safer.

And if we didn't have some kind of an alarm in our nervous system,

We wouldn't have catastrophic thinking.

There would be no need to worry or feel anxious or to try and plan our way out of a situation if there was no threat.

So a simple practice of being in our body and letting our body relax,

Letting the breath deepen,

Is so powerful.

We're reassuring ourselves breath after breath.

Reviews

Thank you for offering this. It is helpful to understand some of why I react

Feeling more at home in my body.

Lynn I love all.of your meditations and your teaching. I find myself craving some periods of silence within them tto investigate the sensations in my body and the thoughts that arise. I hope you'll consider recording some longer practices to allow for some silent contemplation. I keep returning to your meditations - I find them so helpful and reassuring. Many thanks for sharing your teaching here!