There are times when I feel like a battered soul and recognize I have absolutely no control.
I feel overwhelmed and believe everything I do is to no avail.
Inside and outside,
The storm rages on with lashing wind and hail.
It seems no matter what I do,
It falls apart.
I simply want to lay down and give up.
There's no way to mend my broken heart.
And when I close my eyes at night,
The thoughts and fears and worries put up an even bigger fight.
And where did all those voices come from?
The critical voice,
The judging voice,
The disgusted voice,
The shameful voice.
They must all have a say.
And still no rest,
And still no sleep.
I dream I'm in a dark black hole and see myself in a ragged heap.
I give up.
I give up.
And then a crystal voice from out of the dark night of the soul speaks.
Remember,
My sweet child,
When you were very little,
You lived in the present moment.
You were joy.
You were love.
You were peace.
Remember?
And then one day you did or said something that an older person didn't like.
They may have called you stupid,
Worthless,
Or any negative name that you recall.
For doing that silly thing.
You didn't know it was silly.
You didn't know it was wrong.
You didn't know it was stupid.
And of course you had to agree with them.
How would you know?
It must be so.
And you began to believe them.
And on it went.
Many experiences and many voices.
And you became programmed and accepted the voices.
It is true,
I am not good enough,
Not worthy,
Unloved,
Will never be accepted for who I am.
And then the crystal voice again.
My sweet child,
None of that is you.
It is what you are.
My sweet child,
None of that is you.
It is what you began to believe was you.
From the voices of the world.
Listen carefully.
I am you.
I am love.
I am acceptance.
I am connection.
I am peace.
I am joy.
I am present.
I am here right now.
My name is I am.
I simply ask you to notice this beautiful place,
This magnificent earth,
Sometimes called a wilderness.
But you,
Sweet child,
Are surrounded by light,
By angels.
And the light inside of you,
It never goes out.
You can sometimes dim it with little blankets of fear.
But once you recognize that you're the one putting on the blanket,
It becomes easy to let it go and simply remember.
Who you really are.
You are love,
Acceptance,
Peace,
Joy.
And you're here right now with all of your wonderful experiences.
And the experiences are simply to learn from.
It's that simple.
And now understanding.
You begin to learn easily.
And you recognize you're transforming,
Much like the caterpillar sitting on a leaf.
And that's all there is,
That little leaf.
And it just eats and sleeps,
Eats and sleeps.
And then comes the chrysalis,
The cocoon of knowing.
And inside that beautiful chrysalis,
Something magical happens.
Awareness of recognizing.
That I'm more than a caterpillar.
And so,
My sweet child,
Unfold your wings.
And fly.
And so you are.
And so you are.
And so you are.
