Just settling in with our breath,
In deeply,
Out slowly,
Using the breath as a gentle cue to relax and let go.
Let go of the day or week or moment that was,
And come into just this moment,
Just this sleepy time.
Maybe your jaw is stiff or your neck or your hips,
Shoulders,
Toes.
Use your inhale to direct breath to any of those spaces that are clenched.
Maybe you can invite them to release with that oxygen and air.
Maybe just the pressure of the air expanding in your lungs will loosen your shoulders.
Maybe it helps you to breathe,
Clear out your sinuses.
Maybe that's all in your head,
I don't know.
The breathing feels good.
You don't have to make meditation anything esoteric or weird or smart.
Can't forget your thoughts,
You can't separate from them.
You're gonna be thinking about them.
Your brain is alive,
So you'll get distracted.
You might as well make your peace with that now.
You get distracted if you wake up in the middle of the night.
But your brain works,
Because you're alive,
Thank God.
But you can just keep coming back,
Keep noticing your breath,
Keep falling into your body,
Keep relaxing into your bed or wherever it is you're resting and getting quiet.
Getting still without being stony,
Without being silent,
Those aren't possibilities,
You just get slower.
So if you're moving,
If you're fidgeting,
If you're vibrating,
It's barely perceptible.
Maybe your body starts to feel heavy.
You sag and you droop and you fall in,
Letting gravity take over,
Letting your bed swallow you.
Diving in.
And unless you are currently stimulated by diet pills,
You are probably sleepy in some place.
You are probably overwrought and fatigued.
Modern life has a way of doing that to us,
So just notice it.
You could probably fall asleep just by noticing how tired you already are and getting out of the way of all the parts of your body that want to stop,
That are too worked.
And I've had too much strain.
Quitting,
Giving up,
Giving in.
And you can't make yourself sleep,
You can just get out of the way.
Close your eyes if they're not closed already.
Let your jaw relax,
Let your tongue droop.
Let your skin soften.
Breathe in deeply.
Stretch,
Yawn,
Exhale with the word selah,
The ancient biblical breath invocation.
Selah.
Dropping in.
And you can forgive.
You can forgive everyone who bumped into you or elbowed you or cut you off or said something rude or didn't deliver what they promised,
Disappointed you,
Left you anxious,
Hurt your feelings.
It all happens and almost every day.
You can cling to that,
That's okay.
That rage or resentment or disappointment,
But I don't think it'll help you sleep.
You might want to put it aside.
Maybe you're not ready to forgive,
But you could try forgiving,
You could put it aside,
You could let go for the moment and pick up the resentment another day.
It'll be there if you want it.
And since you can forgive other people,
Maybe you,
Maybe you're ready to ask forgiveness.
Maybe,
Maybe.
Maybe you want to try apologizing or just admitting you can be wrong because you are human,
Because you are limited and finite.
That's a great way to be.
What would we do without our mistakes?
How would we live without our mistakes?
Maybe so,
May that be acceptable.
And then it might be getting dark,
Your eyes might be getting tired,
Your sight growing dim.
The edges of dreams creeping in.
And you breathe and you let it all go.
You let it dissipate,
You let your eyesight go,
Your eyes get heavy,
Your face gets heavy,
Maybe a little bit of a smile nonetheless.
Good dreams,
Sweet dreams to come.
You can take a moment to notice that the world has continuity,
That the world has a unity,
That all of this from you in your bed,
To your bed,
To your loved ones,
To the world,
To the universe is all connected.
All shares one origin,
One set of physics and biology,
Some fundamental unity,
And you are a part of the grand play,
The mystery of it all.
Maybe that induces some kind of respect or awe or love.
Maybe not.
Or maybe you could toy with that idea and be thankful,
Be loving towards the universe and all of its oneness.
Find it in your hands to love.
And you're protected,
You can trust in the universe,
Shielded and covered with refuge and protection.
Nothing to fear,
Nothing will harm you,
Complete and sealed,
Connected and protected,
Guarded in all your ways,
Carried by great and good forces,
Up and above any dangerous,
Taking a deep,
Deep breath,
Breathing slowly.
Maybe you exhale on the word cella,
Just a yawn,
Stretch and squirm and scratch,
Whatever you need,
You're giving it all to your body and getting out of the way of the tiredness of the body and the mind and all the work it's done.
All the effort of the day or the week or the month,
We're just living,
Every single day living.
You can be a caregiver to yourself.
Lie down in peace and then you can get up in peace when the time comes,
Sheltered in peace,
Shielded.
Shaded,
Protected and rescued.
Going out of conscious time peacefully to return to consciousness when the time comes,
Peacefully.
Breathing,
Using your breath to relax,
Breathing in very deeply and out very slowly.
When you get distracted as you get distracted,
As is normal and appropriate,
Just come back.
You could trace my voice back to this present moment or use your bed or your breath or stay in a daydream and replay this meditation when you're not as distracted.
That's okay too.
You can't force sleep.
It's a gift that's just waiting for you when you're ready,
But it can't be grasped at.
You'll sleep when you need to and when you're ready.
And great and good forces will be with you.
They were with those who preceded us.
And they'll be with those who come after us,
Watching us so carefully and kindly.
And the universe blesses you and guards you.
Read that in,
All of the blessing and all of the protection.
And the universe and all the stars and all the planets shine on you with grace.
Take that in.
And the universe turns toward you to share peace and give it all over to you.
All of its peace,
All of its equanimity and completeness.
All yours.
And great and good forces gather around as you sleep.
Today you have questions.
And tonight you can deposit those questions on your right side with a great and good force,
Watching out for doubts.
Today you work and tonight you can deposit all of your strength on your left side with the great and good force who attends to vigor.
And before you,
Great force holds a light out through the night.
And behind you,
Great force holds a light through a generous healing.
And over it all,
A wonderful and wondrous sensation of love and loving.
Just fidget,
Stretch,
Do anything you need to do to relax and you can breathe in and exhale with the word Sala.
Sala.
Yawning deeply,
Stretching extensively.
Letting go,
Letting go.
Falling in,
Letting gravity absorb you.
Heart of a loving universe with no beginning and no end.
World that was,
That is,
That will be.
And that provides for your needs when you're asleep and when you're awake.
And you can rest yourself in the palm of the loving universe and have nothing to fear.
