Moving Into Choiceless Awareness

This meditation is in the style of MBSR as formulated by Jon Kabat-Zinn. Here, we practice both concentrating deeply and learning to hold a broad, flexible awareness across our experience from moment to moment. I have incorporated the 5Rs: Recognize, Release, Relax, Re-smile, and Return, adapted from Bhante Vimalaramsi. Many thanks to all my teachers, especially David Potter of Palouse Mindfulness.

Photo by Simon Migaj from Pexels.

Transcript

Welcome.

In this meditation,

We will be stretching and strengthening our mindfulness by practicing with a variety of present moment anchors,

Cultivating our ability to both concentrate deeply on one particular object and also to be flexible,

Being mindful of various aspects of our experience from moment to moment.

The meditation can be done in any posture at any time or place,

But in the beginning,

It is often helpful to find a quiet place to sit or lie down where you will not be disturbed,

Finding a posture that is comfortable for you right now,

But in which you can remain alert and awake.

You might close your eyes or else allow your gaze to fall softly on the floor in front of you or on a wall.

The idea here is just not to let the sense of sight overwhelm the rest of our experience.

I invite you to consider this not as another thing you have to do,

But rather as a time to nurture and take care of yourself,

Setting aside our usual mode of doing and exploring what it's like just to be.

It can sometimes help with this transition to ask yourself,

What would it feel like in my body right now if there was no problem to solve?

And now,

When you're ready,

I invite you to take three slow,

Deep breaths,

Perhaps really extending the length of the exhale.

This can help cue the autonomic nervous system that it's safe and appropriate to relax.

So breathing in and a long,

Slow exhale.

And breathing in and a long,

Slow exhale.

And last one in and a long,

Slow exhale.

And now,

I invite you to allow your breathing to return to whatever feels normal for you right now.

And allowing your awareness to rest on the physical sensations of breathing in the body.

Noticing where in the body the breath feels most vibrant.

Perhaps the coolness or warmth of the in-breath and out-breath at the nose or in the throat.

Or the gentle rise and fall of the chest or belly.

Or perhaps your awareness feels most appropriate right now,

Resting in a broad sense of the entire body.

Feeling the entire body as a field of sensation as it rests here breathing.

From time to time,

Or perhaps from moment to moment,

The mind will wander.

This is never a problem.

When you notice that the mind has wandered,

That moment of recognition is itself the awareness we are cultivating.

Recognize that the mind has wandered and see if it's okay to release and let go of whatever has distracted the mind.

If any tension has built up in the body,

See if it's okay to relax that.

Maybe even smiling a little at how fickle or whimsical the mind can be.

And then gently return the awareness back to the physical sensations of breathing in the body,

Wherever they are most vibrant for you right now.

Okay?

1 Perhaps using distractions as a bell of awareness,

If you hear a sound and realize that you've been lost in thought,

Perhaps being grateful for being brought back so that you can recognize that the mind had wandered and began the process of releasing and letting go,

Of relaxing the body,

Of re-smiling if it feels right for you,

And gently returning to the anchor of the breath.

Current Now,

I invite you to allow your awareness to expand from just the physical sensations of breathing,

Expanding the awareness out to take in the entire body as it rests here.

Noticing all types of physical sensations throughout the body.

You may begin by noticing the feeling of support of the floor or chair beneath you.

Noticing how your body grounds into that support.

Seeing if it's okay to allow yourself to be held.

And now,

Allowing the awareness to open up and notice physical sensations throughout the body.

Feelings like temperature,

Pressure,

Movement of air across the skin,

Or feelings from the inside of tingling or pulsing.

Or perhaps you may feel emotions in your belly or chest from time to time.

Seeing if it's possible to get really curious about what's happening in your body right now.

Noticing how sensations arise in awareness,

How they linger for a time,

How they change,

And how they pass away.

And when they pass,

Just returning to the broad awareness of resting in the entire body as a field of sensation.

From time to time when practicing,

You might notice intense physical sensations.

When this happens,

It's no problem.

It's just what's here right now.

You might experiment with seeing if it's possible to make some space even for those sensations.

Is it possible to bring curiosity to whatever arises,

Whether pleasant,

Unpleasant,

Or neutral?

From time to time,

Physical sensations may become too intense.

And the most wise and compassionate thing to do may be to gently shift your posture to alleviate the discomfort.

But before doing so,

See if it's possible to bring awareness to the intention to move and make the movement slowly,

Mindfully,

Perhaps experimenting with moving as quietly as possible.

And then when you're ready,

Dropping back into stillness and returning the awareness to the expansive and curious exploration of physical sensations in the entire body.

And now,

I invite you to shift your awareness from this broad exploration of physical sensations in the body and zoom your awareness in to focus just on the sense of sound.

Seeing what it's like to pay attention to the sense of sound.

And you may notice that the mind has a tendency to want to label sounds,

To judge sounds,

To tell a story about sounds.

That's no problem.

When you notice that has happened,

You might treat it like any other distraction,

Recognizing that the mind has wandered into thinking or judging.

See if it's okay to release and let go of those thoughts.

Relax any tension that may have built up in the body.

Maybe you re-smile a little.

Noticing how sounds,

Just like physical sensations,

Arise in awareness,

Last for some time,

And pass away all on their own without us having to do anything about them.

You might play with noticing how long you can be aware of a particular sound.

Really noticing how,

Like a wave on the ocean,

The sound begins to rise almost imperceptibly,

Becomes stronger,

Crests,

And more or less slowly fades away.

Now I invite you to allow sounds to fade into the background.

As we gently bring our awareness into the mind.

To begin,

I invite you to investigate your current emotional state.

You may ask yourself,

How is it with me right now?

How am I feeling in this moment?

And see if you can be really open to whatever the response is,

Not knowing in advance the answer to the question.

If you find that you re not feeling a particular emotion in any moment,

That s no problem.

You might note to yourself,

Neutral,

And just remain with that neutrality for a moment until you ask yourself once more,

How am I feeling in this moment?

How am I feeling in this moment?

As with all the anchors,

You may find that the mind has a tendency to have opinions about the emotions,

To judge them,

To tell stories about why they re here.

I invite you to treat these thoughts,

Judgments,

Stories,

Exactly as you ve been practicing treating all distractions.

Recognizing the distraction,

Perhaps noting to yourself in a word or two,

Thinking,

Judging,

Narrative.

See if it s okay to release and let go of that thought.

Relax any tension that has built up in the body.

Maybe re-smile a little.

Maybe you ve heard this story or seen this pattern in your mind over and over again.

That s just how the mind is.

So maybe smile at how serious it wants to take itself.

And when you re ready,

Gently return your awareness with a kind,

Friendly curiosity to your emotional state in this moment.

How is it with me right now?

If some difficult emotion or mood arises,

It s no problem.

You might ask yourself,

Can I be with this right now?

See if it s possible to experience the emotion without identifying with it.

Rather than saying,

I am sad,

Or I am afraid,

See if it s possible to say,

Sadness is here,

Or Fear has arisen.

I encourage you to see if it s possible to hold all of your emotions,

Both pleasant and unpleasant,

With an open hand,

Recognizing it s like this right now.

If you find that some emotion should be too difficult for you right now,

It s always okay to shift your awareness to a different anchor.

You might highlight the breath,

Or the body,

Or sounds for some time.

Recognizing how the body responds to the shift.

And when you re ready,

If you choose to,

You might turn back again,

Perhaps from a greater distance,

Looking at the emotion from very far away,

Making the emotion very small,

And ask,

What am I feeling in this moment?

But you always have a choice,

And sometimes the most compassionate,

Wise thing to do in a particular moment is not to engage with an emotion that is too difficult.

And now,

I invite you to turn your awareness to thoughts.

Just noticing thoughts as mental events.

Observing them.

Watching how they rise and fall away.

Just as sounds rise and fall away.

Thoughts will arise,

Stay for some time,

And if we don t feed them,

Don t get caught up with them,

They will gently dissolve,

All on their own,

Without us having to do anything about them.

And if you find yourself getting caught up in particular thoughts,

That s perfectly normal.

We ve been practicing a long time getting on the train of a particular thought,

Or the bus of a particular thought,

And getting taken for a ride,

Even when we don t want to go to the destination.

You might experiment for a time imagining yourself in a bus terminal.

Thoughts like buses pull in?

See if it s possible to let them pull out without getting on board.

Or if you suddenly wake up and realize that you re on a particular bus,

See if it s okay to step off and return to just observing the buses as they come and go.

Right.

Noticing thoughts as mental events,

Just as sounds had been auditory events,

Or body sensations as physical events.

How they each arise in awareness,

Linger sometime,

And then dissolve,

Fading,

Ceasing,

Of their own accord,

Without us having to do anything about it.

How they each arise in awareness,

Linger sometime,

And then dissolve,

Fading,

Ceasing,

Of their own accord,

Without us having to do anything about it.

Now I'm going to invite you to expand your awareness one last time.

Let it get really wide,

Holding that kind,

Open-handed curiosity,

Wide open,

Letting go of all the previous objects of meditation,

The anchors we've been working with,

And instead of highlighting a single anchor,

Simply allow yourself to just sit here and be aware of whatever is here.

If thoughts arise,

Just note them,

Perhaps observe them as they arise in awareness,

Crest,

And pass away.

If emotions arise,

Treat them in the same way.

If physical sensations become highlighted in experience,

Simply note them,

And allow the awareness to rest with them until some other object becomes highlighted in the field of awareness,

Broadening our awareness so that it can hold whatever arises with a gentle,

Open,

Curious attention.

This practice is sometimes called choiceless awareness.

We are identifying with the awareness itself and watching,

With kind curiosity,

Whatever arises in this field of awareness,

For as long as it lingers,

And watching it fade away,

Observing the movement of the mind.

You may note if the mind has a tendency to prefer one type of object to another,

And see if it's possible,

Just for now,

To let go of that preference.

Practicing holding with equanimity whatever arises,

Whether it's pleasant or unpleasant,

A thought,

A sensation,

A sound,

Recognizing our experience as a stream of events,

A stream of sensations,

Thoughts,

Emotions arising and passing away from our awareness.

And if,

From time to time,

You find yourself uprooted in this practice,

Drifting and not aware,

You might bring your awareness back to one of the anchors,

To breath or sound or physical sensations for a time,

Noticing the quality of the mind.

And when the mind feels grounded and still,

You might once again open up the awareness and see what arises.

But you always have a choice,

Even in choiceless awareness.

And as this practice comes to an end,

I invite you to reflect for a moment on your own experience and on your own experience.

What is it like to take time from human doing and rest instead in human being?

What is it like to explore the different aspects of your experience,

Watching them arise,

Linger,

Shift and fade away?

Not having to always be caught up in thoughts or feelings or reactivity?

What is it like to pay gentle,

Friendly curiosity to yourself and to your own experience?

You might consider seeing if you can take some of this expansiveness,

Some of this openness,

Some of this curiosity into the rest of your day.

Perhaps noting from time to time throughout the day,

How is it with me right now?

What is my experience right now?

What is drawing my awareness most strongly right now?

Noticing how whatever it is arises and how it passes away.

And how you are cultivating the ability to hold whatever is here with equanimity and gentleness,

Responding wisely to each moment as it is.

Thank you.

Reviews

Amazing💯

❤️

Fabulous, thank you

Beautiful 🌸

Excellent practice in choiceless awareness with crystal clear guidance. Overall very helpful for both beginers and advanced. I wish there were less of instructions and more of quiet moments in the session. Thank you !

I have been meditating often on now for a couple of years. This is the best most meaningful meditation I think I have ever had. I love it

very relaxing and supportive, thank you.