The Power Of Turning Toward Your Feelings

00:30

12:31

The Power Of Turning Toward Your Feelings

by Ann Weiser Cornell

Type

talks

Activity

Meditation

Suitable for

Everyone

When a feeling is unpleasant, do you try to make it go away or cheer yourself up? Ann Weiser Cornell offers a simpler idea: turn toward the feeling and give it your presence, without trying to fix, change, or solve it. You are guided to feel your body's contact with what holds you, sense your throat, chest, and stomach, check words that fit, and say hello using the phrase "something in me." She explains why she trusts what comes from the body, and why life moves forward when you are with how you feel. This content is educational and is not a substitute for one-to-one professional care.

Felt Sense Check In Contact Point Awareness Emotional Awareness Emotional Presence Body Awareness Emotional Acknowledgment

Meet your Teacher

Ann Weiser Cornell

Berkeley, CA, USA

Meet your Teacher

Ann Weiser Cornell

Berkeley, CA, USA

Transcript

Hello, I'm Anne Weiser Cornell and this is. . . Support for stressful times. How nice we get to spend a little time together each month. Giving each other support. For stressful times. I was just thinking. As I was getting ready to talk to you today. About. Unpleasant feelings. Pain, Nausea. Senses of distress. What do we do with that? There's a natural tendency to want to make those feelings go away. Alleviate. Find some answer, Something that helps them. Be reduced. Or just avoid them, Right? Did you have a thought that brought that feeling? Well, Let's avoid that thought. You know what I'm going to say about that, Don't you? But what's interesting is. . . It's not. What I'm going to recommend is not necessarily a natural. Move, At least not in the culture I'm from. I'm from a world where. If you feel bad, You try to feel better. If somebody else feels bad, You try to cheer them up. And even the phrase, Just be with it. Seems to imply. Give it some caring or give it some love. Love or send it some light or something like that. About what I'd recommend what we do in the inner relationship focusing world. Is a simpler kind of being with. And that's like a simple. It doesn't try to change anything. It's a radical idea. When we feel something uncomfortable and pleasant, Stressful, Tense. That we. Say hello to it. And we sit with it. Or bring attention to. We welcome it. Why would you welcome something that feels bad? For one reason, Because it's bringing you and a very important message. There's something that needs attention here. You know, A lot of this has to do with trust. Do we trust? The messages that we're getting from inside, Our emotional messages, Our physical messages. I've come to believe that. What we get from our. Body process is trustworthy. Let's practice that together, Shall we? It's always nice to do this process with other people. And it would start by Healing. Your body grounded. Feeling your body in contact with what you're sitting on. You might also be standing or lying down. Most people are probably sitting. I'm slidding. Feeling your body's contact with the sitting. What you're sitting on. I often. . . Realize I had not been paying attention to what I was sitting on and I pause and I sense, Oh right, Oh, There is something holding me up. I can relax a little bit. There we go. In that breeze. Now that feeling of being here arrives. And then I let my awareness come to the inner area of the body. You might want to do that too. Throat and chest and stomach and belly. How are you in there right now? And don't answer quickly. Take a little time. To sense. Because you know what, The body takes longer to talk usually. Our nice fast mind. Mine says, Oh, I'm OK. Wait a minute, Let's ask the body. This happened to me all the time when I was first learning focusing. People would say, Go in your body and ask how you are right now. And I would say, It's fine. That's how I learned growing up in my family. Illinois. It's, I'm fine, It's fine, Everything's fine, Even all the times that it wasn't. Supposed to say it's fine. Notice what happens right now. When you pause and sense. And go past. It's fine or there's nothing there into actually how it feels. You know, There's never nothing. I learned that. I used to think I feel nothing. Then I discovered. I was feeling something. Subtle. And maybe not what I expected and maybe not one of the feelings that has a name like sad or angry. You always are feeling something. Takes a little time. Yeah, And so what I'm finding is. . . There's a. . . Peaceful. Quality in most of my body down here. Down here. There's something a little. A little guarded, A little protected. So I'm. . . Acknowledging all of that. You might acknowledge what you're aware of. And then I especially bring attention to the place that might have something to show me or say to me. I'll check those words guarded, Protected to see if they're right. You might want to check any words that come for you. And see if they fit for you. What's coming is. That it has something to do with. Conversation, A stressful conversation that I had with my Sweetie last night. Ah. Ha ha ha. Yes, There's my deep breath. Something like my shoulders fall. Yeah. A little bit sad, A little bit discouraged. Disappointed. Checking with the, Let me check those parts. None of them are right. It's in between discouraged and disappointed. Oh yeah, It's more like. . . Helpless. Don't know what to do in that kind of. Clash happens. Checking if that's right. Yeah, That's close. It when when it the thing I found. To describe it. Fits or is close, There's a little easing. One way your body says yes to you is by when it's easy. Interestingly, Another way your body can say yes is with attention. Intensification or a tightening. No is usually. You didn't find yet. Work too. So we're spending time just with how it feels right now. And what we're putting into practice is what I was talking about at the start. Of this webinar, Which is turning toward what we feel is not the same as trying to fix it or cheer it up or alleviate it or solve it. It's simpler than that. It's turning to art. It's being with. That's what I'm going to do right now. I found this place. It's told me what it's about. Now I'm going to be with it. Feel free to do that with whatever's coming in you. What if you simply give whatever you're feeling. Simply give it your presence. Like sitting with a friend but not trying to tell them what to do and how to feel better and how to cheer up or how to solve their just being. Just being. I think you'll find. It's glad you're there with it. Funny way of talking, But. We're sensing health. These things feel in our body. And one way they could feel is. Glad you're here. And then if you find I don't like it. It's unpleasant. It's painful. I wish it wasn't there. You say hello to that. There's a magical language if you've been with me before you've heard me use this language something in me. Let me do that. I'm sensing something in me feeling. . . Somewhere between discouraged and disappointed. And I am also sensing something in me. Wishing that wasn't there. And I am saying hello to both of you. I'm the space. Where both of these can be. I'm not fighting with any way that I feel. I'm allowing. And being with. I'm welcoming. Because over time, I've come to trust and I've learned. I want to communicate to you. But you can trust this too. When we are with how we feel. Life moves forward. It's the opposite of being stuck.