Hello and welcome to the Harmonious Mind,
A space to slow down and gently reset your nervous system.
My name is Tanya McIntyre,
Your Mindfulness Mentor.
We're located in the beautiful lakeside town of Goderich,
Ontario,
Canada.
These short reflections are crafted to help you build a kinder relationship with your mind.
Let this reach you the way music does,
Without effort,
Without judgment,
Simply allowing yourself to be here in the moment.
Today we'll explore how balancing the books of your life can provide you with better mental health.
What do you want for your life in 2026?
As the new year approaches,
We're inundated with messages telling us how to change things up or set new goals to have a better year than last year.
It might help to think of life in a number scheme.
4,
264.
It doesn't really sound like a big number,
Does it?
4,
264 is the number of weeks in the average lifetime.
Life passes us in the blink of an eye,
So think about balancing the books of your life every day,
Because you never know when that day could be your last day.
And it's always a good idea to not leave a mess behind for our loved ones to have to clean up.
So balancing the books of our life every day is a great practice to keep us simple,
Peaceful,
And clutter-free.
My sister had to clean up after the passing of both our parents,
Because I was living out of the country at the time,
And she gifted me a book this Christmas that says,
I'm dead,
Now what?
And it's actually a very helpful tool to help me balance the books of my life,
To make sure she has everything she needs when I shuffle off this mortal coil,
So she's not having the added stress of having to do everything we have to do when our loved ones pass away.
As you're heading into this new year,
Try seeking some self-discovery over self-improvement.
Seeking self-improvement can sometimes turn into just another way to beat ourselves up.
Now there's nothing inherently wrong with wanting to better ourselves,
But it can become a pitfall.
You might have the discipline to attain all the milestones you think you need to be happy,
But without discovering yourself,
You might be building a world that isn't actually for you.
That's the difference between self-discovery and self-improvement.
Self-discovery is about uncovering who you are and what you truly want from life.
It's about finding the principles,
Passions,
And goals that are uniquely rewarding and fulfilling to you.
Self-discovery begins with using our brains,
All three of them.
Yes,
We have three brains.
We have our head brain,
Which is our thoughts.
We have our heart brain,
Which is our emotions.
And we have a gut brain,
Our nervous system.
Our head is our human brain that controls all the higher order functions,
You know,
Things like reasoning,
Planning,
Problem solving.
And then we have our heart,
Which is our mammalian brain,
And that governs our emotions and our ability to form social connections.
And finally,
Our gut,
Is our reptilian brain associated with our nervous system.
It has over a hundred million nerve endings,
And they actually all produce 90% of our body's dopamine and serotonin chemicals.
It is a complex system that promotes feelings of pleasure,
Motivation,
And satisfaction.
We actually use these brains as a framework to describe our experience of the world.
You can hear it in our language when we use phrases like,
I'm stuck in my head,
Or my heart's not in it,
Or how about this one,
We've all said this,
I have a gut feeling.
The practice of mindfulness and Tai Chi teach me the importance of being in the present moment,
Taking time to listen to my heart and feel my gut.
As a mindfulness mentor,
My mantra has become,
It's not what we do in life,
It's how we do it that matters.
And this can actually be a foreign concept to us humans.
We're programmed from the time we're born to provide and perform.
So imagine what your life would be like if you were able to take pleasure in every single moment.
For instance,
How are you listening to this right now?
There might be more pleasurable ways to experience it.
Perhaps it's being less rushed,
Perhaps it's with your favorite drink,
Or maybe just noticing the sensations in your body,
Feeling how the words land in your system.
Think of the emotional stages of development for an infant.
A baby can cry without any shame or resistance.
Their emotions are completely impersonal.
And then as we get older,
We're taught to repress certain feelings like anger and sadness.
And then,
Oh man,
Then there's adolescence.
We start to have those big emotional experiences.
Emotions seem to take control of us.
Do you remember that?
And then we start trying to manage our emotions.
And that can become a form of repression in itself.
We are taught to ignore them,
Avoid them,
Distract ourselves.
Many people don't even want to feel emotions because they think it's going to hurt.
But it's actually the resistance to the emotion that can be painful.
When our emotions are allowed to flow freely,
They can't control us anymore.
Instead,
There can be a deep enjoyment of them.
The definition of pleasure is the awareness of sensation moving through your body.
The more pleasure we can feel,
The more our nervous system knows that it's safe.
And when we feel safe,
We can connect with the pleasure that is right here,
Right now.
Like anything else,
Your capacity for pleasure is something you can grow into.
And as you learn how to welcome pleasure,
Your ability to have pleasure grows and grows.
Thank you so much for being here with me.
I hope these insights offer you some serenity.
Join me again for future episodes of The Harmonious Mind as we continue to explore practical ways to build better mental health.
Until then,
May your coffee,
Your heart,
And your patience be strong.
I'm Tanya McIntyre,
Your mindfulness mentor.
May the force of mindfulness be with you always.
And remember,
You are the force.
