Well,
I hope you're doing well.
So grateful to be with you for a another week as we journey and experience life and being human together.
And it can be interesting and,
Uh,
Definitely challenging at times.
So hang in there and hope you're encouraged by this time together.
And that our curiosity leads us to discovering and understanding a little more about ourselves through this IFS lens.
And today I'm going to give you 10 frequently asked questions about internal family systems or IFS.
I know lots of people are curious about the model,
And I hope that these 10 questions help give you just a little more insight.
And the first question is what is IFS?
Internal family systems or IFS is a type of therapy created or discovered by Dr.
Richard or Dick Schwartz in the 1980s.
And it suggests that our mind is made up of different parts,
Each with its own viewpoints,
Feelings,
And memories.
At the center is the self,
Which is all about our core and who we are before we took on any burdens or trauma when we were fully healed and we still have that self within us and IFS aims to heal wounded parts and bring balance.
Inside of you and me,
And ultimately spreads in our broader relationships and in the world.
Number two,
What are the main components of IFS?
IFS has these key parts first,
The self,
And this is the heart of a person filled with qualities like calmness,
Curiosity,
Compassion,
Confidence.
And then you have our parts and these are like sub-personalities within us.
And they come in three types.
First,
There's that protective realm that are seeking to protect those younger inner child parts or what we call exiles underneath.
And in that protective realm,
You have managers.
These are parts that try to keep control and protect us from hurt,
Younger parts that are doing the best that they can,
But they tend to be more managerial.
And then at the other end of the spectrum,
There are firefighters,
Parts that react very much like firefighters do quickly to soothe the pain when exiles begin to get upset and they can often react to those managers and some of the ways that they're managing and doing things.
And then underneath those protectors are the exiles.
And these are parts that carry pain and are often hidden underneath by those managers and firefighters.
And as we can have those managers and firefighters and protectors trust us more who we are today,
Because they often don't know that we're adults and they often don't know the age that we are.
And it helps when we tell them,
But when they begin to trust us,
They don't want to be in control.
They realize they need some help.
And then we,
From that self-led place of calmness,
Curiosity,
Compassion can go and help unburden those exiles.
And then ultimately the protectors can unburden too.
Number three,
How does IFS work?
And there are many steps,
But here's some that may bring some clarity.
First of all,
Identifying parts.
A practitioner helps you find and describe your parts.
And as you get in touch with them,
You find that similar ones tend to show up over and over again.
Second is getting to know those parts and you get to understand the roles and goals of your parts.
Then number three,
Healing exiles and protectors.
With the self's help,
You work to heal those parts within,
Getting those protectors to trust so that we can go to the exiles and then those exiles are healed and then unburdened.
And those protectors tend to be able to be unburdened and healed too.
And it brings more balance to our system.
And then finally on this list that I have,
Restoring balance.
The aim is to get the internal system working well with the self leading and the parts out of extreme roles into more healthier roles so that they're no longer managers,
So stressed out and keeping lists that they keep the system unbalanced and the firefighters that are reacting so hard from an unhealthy place,
But they can come into less extreme roles,
Healthier roles,
And they can still be,
Tend to be more reactive or more managerial,
But they're working as a team and they bring balance to our system and the self is driving.
Four,
Who can benefit from IFS?
And IFS can help people with many issues and some of them,
Anxiety.
I know I struggle with anxiety and this process of the mind being multiple,
Getting to know my parts has helped me greatly.
Depression,
For me,
My anxiety tends to lead me to be depressed.
And the ripple effect of this work has helped me with that.
But just helping to know that those young depressed parts aren't alone.
There is a broader system and ultimately that self also has aspects that are bigger than us,
More of a mystery that's hard to understand and that's comforting for me.
Trauma,
PTSD,
Relationship problems.
I know when I become more self-led,
I'm a better husband and parent.
And it helps those external relationships.
Low self-esteem,
Through this IFS process,
You get more confidence and trust in yourself and then also eating disorders,
Addiction,
And other tendencies to be more dissociative and compulsive.
It's helpful with that.
And I know I tend to turn to food a lot and I've noticed that I can pause and realize that that's a part.
I may still go and get that extra cookie,
But it helps me bring more balance and don't do it as often,
Or I have more grace for myself when I do it.
And so these are just a few cases where folks could benefit from IFS and it encompasses a lot and it's also good for anyone looking just to grow personally and understand themselves better.
Number five,
Is IFS therapy evidence-based?
Yes,
It's backed by evidence.
Studies have shown it works well for various conditions,
Especially as I mentioned,
Complex trauma,
PTSD,
And people who've had IFS therapy often see big improvements in their symptoms and overall happiness.
And you can find some of those studies if you just Google the same question as IFS therapy evidence-based and you can find some of those online.
And then number six,
The second half of our frequently asked questions about IFS in this list of 10,
What's the role of the practitioner or therapist in IFS?
And the practitioner or therapist guides and supports.
They help you connect with yourself and to get to know your parts.
And in session,
When you don't have what we call that critical mass of self or that calmness,
Curiosity,
Compassion,
Confidence,
The therapist can help hold that self-energy until you're able to reach a critical mass and to walk alongside of you.
And the practitioner,
They make sure that you feel safe and encourages you to lead your inner healing.
You're the one in charge here and they need to defer and trust you.
And they want you to be able to keep healing even after the time in session with them ends.
Number seven,
How long does IFS therapy and the process typically take?
And it's probably no surprise to you,
But it doesn't have a set time.
Some might see change quickly while others need more time for deeper issues.
And it's tailored to you.
So how fast you progress depends on your situation,
Your system,
And the system's readiness for change.
But you can't rush the process.
But I've found that in going slow,
When the time is right,
You do tend to move faster.
And then number eight,
Can I practice IFS on my own?
And while it's best to work with a trained practitioner for tough issues,
You can try IFS techniques by yourself.
And I hope that you've done that some through the content with this podcast.
And there are also self-help books,
Workshops,
Online tools to guide you.
But I would say for serious trauma,
Deep-rooted problems,
And just general consistency,
I see my own practitioner regularly because it's just easier to do the work when I have someone guiding me.
And so I've found that working with someone trained in IFS can be a huge asset regardless.
But do explore on your own and check in with your parts regularly.
Then number nine,
What should I look for in an IFS practitioner or therapist?
And this is a good question to ask.
And I would say when looking for a practitioner,
Think about first training.
Find someone who is trained in the model.
And it doesn't have to necessarily be through the IFS Institute,
Even though I'm level two trained and would recommend it to anyone.
But there are other folks doing some training,
But make sure that they know what they're doing and that they,
Number two,
Have some experience.
Choose someone who knows how to handle your specific problems,
Relates to you,
And they've got some hours under their belt in practicing.
I know for me,
Over 200 hours of one-on-one work with clients.
And not that anyone needs particularly a certain number of hours,
But make sure that they have experience and that they resonate with you.
And that leads to number three,
Compatibility.
You should feel comfortable and safe with them.
And then their approach.
Make sure that they're kind,
That they're holding that self-energy,
And that they don't try to label or pathologize you just like IFS teaches.
And that ultimately,
They're there as an ally to walk alongside of you and they take that approach.
And then finally,
Of this list of 10,
And there are many more questions,
I know,
But we'll end with this one.
How can I learn more about IFS?
And I'd encourage you to find books like Internal Family Systems Therapy and No Bad Parts by Dick Schwartz.
Websites,
There are many out there.
And so check out those websites and resources.
Then workshops,
Trainings,
Many programs out there that you can join.
And then finally,
Talk to an IFS practitioner or therapist about what you want to know and get their input.
