Today,
I want to share with you something about codependent relationships.
This concept is very much associated to toxic or dysfunctional connections,
And it has to do with someone believing and behaving as if they were dependent from another person in an unhealthy way.
How and why does this happen?
What makes us feel codependent?
What makes us suddenly believe that we need a specific person in our life?
This easily happens when someone played the game of manipulation with another person to consciously or unconsciously make this other person feel attached to them.
Let me give you a very basic example that we can then apply at many levels and in many different situations.
We meet someone and on the next day,
The person sends us a message saying that they liked being with us and that they would like to meet us again.
We answer saying yes,
That we can meet at our house and that we both just have to decide at what time.
The person doesn't say anything.
In the meantime,
We send another message saying that they can come at,
Let's say,
Four o'clock.
Then the person shows up at our house without saying anything previously and we ask them if they have seen all of our messages.
They answer with some excuse and we spend a great time with this person.
We liked so much their company that by the end of the day,
We spontaneously send a message asking if they want to meet again on the weekend,
For example.
During the next days,
The person doesn't say anything.
So we start checking our messages every single hour,
Hoping to receive an answer.
On the weekend,
The person finally sends a message saying that they only saw our message that day and that they really want to be with us.
The date goes well,
But we now experienced some coldness from this person,
Although they continue showing their irresistible qualities.
At this point,
Our energy already shifted.
It lowered to a state of fear that is translated into confusion and maybe some anxiety as well.
On one side,
They seem to be wonderful and so interested in us and on the other side,
They act weird and distant.
We now have a list of known answered questions and doubts about this person.
We start feeling that we need them in several ways,
Their presence,
Their qualities,
And also their answers and explanations that somehow seem to never completely satisfy us and bring peace.
Their actions,
Choices,
Decisions are becoming very important to us and slowly we are giving them not only our affection,
Our investment,
And our time,
But also our power.
Why does this person act this way?
For some reason,
They are in a state of neediness and so they act from a place of fear.
Although their actions may seem to express some kind of freedom and spontaneity,
They can actually be very calculated.
It is like a game in which they are very much in control of what we feel towards them and yet it feels as if we are the ones who carry all the burdens from the connection as obviously this person seems to discard themselves from any responsibility.
A hot and cold behavior,
A non-consistent care and affection easily result in codependency.
We then may become emotionally,
Mentally,
And even physically attached to them depending on how this situation develops.
The tricky part is that it seems that we are the ones who desperately need them when in reality it is exactly the opposite.
So today,
Whatever our situation is,
Let's close our eyes for just a moment.
Let's imagine that we are this huge ball of light.
We shine so bright that wherever we go,
We illuminate everything around us.
As we do this,
We not only see the external parts of all beings,
But we also see through their appearance.
We see that they are just like us,
Huge balls of light.
We now see them as their core essence,
As souls.
We no longer have reasons to codepend on others in any way because now we know that we are all made of light.
We only cover ourselves with more or less fear.
No matter how much power we gave or have been giving to others,
We are getting it all back.
Let's now visualize the one person or the people on whom we are codependent.
Let's visualize each of them attached to us by a rope.
Now let's cut all the ropes.
As we do this,
We are freeing ourselves from any codependency feeling or belief.
We empower ourselves,
We release all the attachments,
And we raise our vibration.
We have experienced and faced the world of fear to now experience and appreciate the world of love.
We are light and the light that we are is enough on its own.
It is eternal,
We now allow ourselves to be innocent again,
To follow our heart,
To trust the universe,
And to fly like a soap bubble blown by a child.
