I made a new friend today.
Her name is Sadness.
I've known her for a long,
Long time,
But I felt too ashamed to call her mine.
But she's used to that.
She's often rejected,
Made out to be some unwelcome identity that we only dare possess.
I've met her many times,
More than I can count.
Sometimes she's even extended her stay in such a way that I don't feel like I can get out.
But today,
Today I made a new friend.
She showed up ready to make a name for herself because she knows what's next.
She knows that she has to give her all before she is shoved further into the archives of our souls that we mark off with yellow tape because she is a caution that we cannot face.
But to her surprise,
I welcomed her into my home,
Into my heart.
I felt the tightness in my throat and the heaviness in my chest,
And I told her that I loved her.
I love her because she gives me the opportunity to feel,
To feel deeper than most can even imagine.
All of the qualities that make up who she is,
Whether we resist her presence or not.
The grief,
The pain,
The loneliness.
But today I told her how grateful I am for her visits and all of her characteristics.
Because without her,
I would not feel all that I do.
I would not feel the love,
The passion,
The excitement.
I would not wake each day feeling my heart overflow simply by the sound of the birds singing their morning melody.
I would not see the beauty in the light that surrounds me every day.
I would not know the kindness of a stranger simply from the smile in their eyes.
Much like I would not know and love the warmth of the sun shining on my face if I did not experience the cold and the darkness.
So today I made a new friend in an old enemy.
I know she has a lot to teach me and this time I'm ready to learn.