28 | Exploring Compassion 1 (With Mini-Class)

Learn about compassion with a mini-class (3 minutes) before the practice & with a quick de-brief after. Practice two types of compassion practice in this session - one approach for a close person and another for a difficult person. This practice is particularly suited to those wanting detailed instructions, provided at regular intervals, to help master the fundamentals of using embodied anchors as a tool for building concentration. This practice supports Week 8 of my 8-Week mindfulness program.

Transcript

G'day,

My name is Rachel Grace.

Thanks for joining me for this practice on exploring compassion.

This session starts with a mini-class for around three minutes before we get into a practice that runs for around 15 minutes.

Compassion is biologically based,

And scientists consider compassion to be one of the key adaptive strategies in our entire human evolution.

Compassion can drive us to rise above self-interest and make prosocial choices that support interconnection in relationships.

As a species,

Of course,

Sustaining interconnection in relationships has always been a key survival strategy from our primitive past.

But in modern times,

Studies show that feeling a sense of interconnection is positive not just for our emotional well-being,

But for our physical well-being too.

But the stress and strain of life can take its toll on us in many ways,

And one way that bites is by muting our capacity to feel compassion for the suffering of others.

But compassion can be nurtured back to health and consciously cultivated to growing strength through dedicated compassion practices.

In this session,

We will explore two styles of compassion practice so that you can experience how these practices might work for you and then be in the position to make an informed decision about which type of practice might support you best to cultivate compassion in different ways for different people.

Both stages of this practice involve combining a repeated inner intention with a visualization to cultivate feelings of compassionate care for others.

In part one,

The focus is on directing compassion to someone you care about.

In part two,

The focus is on directing compassion to someone who is a bit difficult for you to feel care for.

So let's prepare for our practice by starting with a stretch.

Gently rolling your shoulders up towards your ears as you breathe in,

And then relaxing your shoulders back and down again as you breathe out.

I invite you now to take a moment to find a posture that will support you to be both alert and relaxed for this practice.

Let your awareness take in the space around you too,

Gently seeing the environment you're in,

Noticing the sounds around you.

If during this practice an overwhelming emotional state or physical pain arises,

Or you just find yourself incredibly sleepy or feeling agitated,

The invitation is to support yourself to rebalance before deciding whether to rejoin or set aside the practice for today.

Some skilful ways to rebalance energy is to move your body and change your posture,

Or you can shift your attention either to your anchor of choice or by opening your eyes to look at the environment around you.

Finally,

You can take a big breath.

In particular,

You can take a big in-breath to boost your energy,

Or you can take a big long extended out-breath to rebalance a sense of agitation.

Now I invite you to join me in taking a nice deep breath in,

Filling your lungs,

And then as you let go with a long out-breath,

Allowing your eyes to gently close or softening your gaze down to the floor if that feels right for you.

If you would like to,

You can set an intention right now for how you want to approach this valuable practice time.

We'll start the practice with the ring of a gong.

Becoming aware now of the sensations of breathing.

Breathing in,

Know you're breathing in.

And breathing out,

Know you're breathing out.

Bringing awareness now to your body,

Noticing how your body feels in this moment.

Without judging what it feels like,

Just noticing what it feels like.

Notice the state of your heart and mind right now,

Holding whatever is there with a kind attention.

Wherever you are,

Whatever the state of your body and mind,

You are welcome to share in this practice from that place.

To set a steady foundation of focus and calm before we begin the self-compassion practice,

I invite you to take the next minute or so to bring a relaxed and focused attention to your preferred anchor,

Whether that's paying attention to the sensations of the flow of breath or awareness of sounds arising and passing or feeling the different kinds of physical sensations in your feet and hands right now.

Whatever your preferred primary anchor is,

I invite you to settle your attention there now,

And each time you notice that your mind wanders,

Gently return your attention to your anchor.

Compassion practice can sometimes be challenging.

If feelings of irritation,

Anger or upset arise,

That can happen and it's okay.

But if those feelings do start to get overwhelming,

Just remember you're welcome to take a break,

You can set the instructions aside and return to your anchor to allow yourself to rebalance before deciding whether to rejoin the practice or set it aside this time.

So please keep this in mind as we go through this practice.

In this first type of compassion practice,

The focus is on directing compassion to someone you care about.

So to begin,

I invite you to bring to mind someone close to you who you dearly love or you care for.

There may be many people that come to mind,

Only a few people or just one person and that's okay.

For this practice,

I invite you to choose just one person to focus on in particular.

Now bring that person to mind and as you do,

Let yourself feel your natural and spontaneous caring for them.

Choose how you hold them in your heart.

Then let yourself be aware of the difficulties they have had in the past,

The challenges they currently face,

The many forms of suffering,

Small and large,

That they have endured.

Feel how your heart opens to wish them well,

To extend comfort,

To share in their pain and meet it with compassion.

This is the natural response of the heart.

Now I invite you to inwardly repeat these phrases,

Directing them to this person you care for.

May you be held in compassion.

May your pain and sorrow be eased.

May your heart be at peace.

Continue repeating all the while you are holding them in your heart.

May you be held in compassion.

May your pain and sorrow be eased.

May your heart be at peace.

Keep repeating these intentions of compassion or find other words that feel more suitable for you to express your feelings and compassionate wishes for this person you care about.

Now imagine that they turn to you and acknowledge the suffering that you have gone through and the challenges that you face as well.

They say to you with kindness the same phrases.

May you be held in compassion.

May your pain and sorrow be eased.

May you be at peace.

Begin these compassionate wishes and let them touch your heart.

Take a moment to notice the state of your body,

Mind and heart now.

Has cultivating compassion in this way impacted you?

Has there been a shift or change in any way?

If there's no change,

That's okay,

You can notice that.

But if something has shifted,

That's okay too,

Notice what that's like.

As we move to part two of exploring compassion.

The focus is now on directing compassion to someone who you find difficult.

There may be many people that come to mind,

Only a few people or just one person in particular and that's okay.

For this practice I invite you to choose just one difficult person to focus on.

And particularly since this is an introductory exploration of compassion,

It's important not to choose the person who has hurt you the most in the world or someone who it will be distressing to bring to mind.

Just someone who you find mildly to moderately difficult.

Bring that person to mind now.

Now I invite you to inwardly repeat these phrases,

Directing them to this person that you find difficult.

This person has a body and mind just like me.

This person has feelings,

Emotions and thoughts just like me.

This person has in his or her life experienced physical and emotional pain and suffering just like me.

This person has at some point been sad,

Disappointed,

Angry or hurt just like me.

This person has felt unworthy or inadequate just like me.

This person worries and is frightened sometimes just like me.

This person has longed for friendship just like me.

This person is learning about life just like me.

This person wants to be content with what life has given just like me.

This person wishes to be free from pain and suffering just like me.

This person wishes to be safe and healthy just like me.

This person wishes to be happy just like me.

And this person wishes to be loved just like me.

And then from that place of recognition,

Wishing this person well,

Silently repeating these phrases as you hold them in your mind and heart.

I wish for this person to have the strength,

Resources and social support to navigate the difficulties in their life with ease.

I wish for this person to be free from pain and suffering.

I wish for this person to be peaceful and happy.

I wish that this person be loved.

Because this person is a fellow human being just like me.

Take a moment to notice the state of your body,

Mind and heart now.

Has cultivating compassion in this way impacted you?

Has there been a shift or change in any way?

If there's no change,

That's okay,

You can notice that.

If something has shifted,

That's okay too.

Notice what that's like.

As we approach the end of the veil practice now,

I invite you to join me in taking a deep breath in,

Filling the lungs right up.

And then relaxing your body and your mind as you breathe out and let go.

Allow the corners of the mouth to rise ever so slightly into a gentle half smile,

Savouring this moment.

And to conclude,

I'll ring the gong three times.

In your own timing,

Allow your eyes to open,

Gently bringing your attention back up into the environment around you.

Take a moment to stretch or sit back and just notice how you feel.

Do you feel the same as you did before this practice or has something changed?

In this formal practice,

We explored two approaches for cultivating compassion.

You can use these practices,

Not just in formal sitting practice,

But in your daily life by pausing and taking these three steps towards compassion.

First,

Recognise and feel for the suffering of others,

Turning towards it,

Not away from it.

Second,

Internally initiate a compassionate response to their suffering by repeating phrases that convey care and well wishes for their safety,

Wellbeing and happiness.

And third,

You can externally activate some compassionate action by offering to help,

Expressing gratitude or doing some other random act of kindness with the intention to alleviate their suffering in some way.

Using these three steps of compassion in daily life can not only support the wellbeing of others,

It can positively impact the state of your body,

Mind and heart too.

When you use these skills,

Whether that's in formal practice or out in life,

Your capacity for compassion will grow and you'll be strengthening the neural networks in your brain that support kind and wise behavioural responses towards others when they are struggling.

Now as we conclude,

Take a moment to appreciate yourself for the dedication to your own wellbeing that you've just demonstrated.

Each time you practice you are changing your brain for the better and building your capacity to handle life more skilfully,

So well done.

May mindfulness positively impact you,

What you do and all of those around you.

Thanks for practicing with me.

I hope you will join me again.

Reviews

Thank you! The compassion meditation for someone that I have difficulty with was great. It really opened me up in a way nothing else has!

Great introduction to intentionally bringing compassion into our daily lives.

Thank you 💙🙏🏻💙