Empowering The Mind: Understanding Irrational Beliefs

This guided meditation from the Live Event Series on Life Balance is based on Albert Ellis's list of Irrational Beliefs. It is designed to identify and transform the beliefs that may be holding you back from reaching your full potential. Through a calming and introspective journey, you'll explore the subconscious mind, uncovering the thoughts that constrain your actions and self-perception.

This meditation will gently guide you through a process of reflection and reframing, offering new, empowering perspectives that foster self-confidence and growth. Whether you seek to overcome self-doubt, embrace change, or simply cultivate a more positive mindset, this meditation provides a safe and supportive space to reshape your beliefs and unlock your inner strength.

Transcript

If you're sitting,

Feel yourself sink a little bit deeper into your seat.

If you're sleeping,

Sink deeper into your bed.

And if it is safe to do so,

You can close your eyes.

And as you close your eyes,

Bring your focus to your breath.

Without forcing the breath,

Observe the breath as it moves in and out of your nostrils.

And with every breath,

Breathe in calm.

With every breath out,

Feel any stress,

Any tension,

Any worry simply releasing.

And start to scan your body from head to toe.

And as you scan your body,

Observe for any areas of discomfort,

Any areas of stress,

Any areas of tension.

And with every outgoing breath,

Start to release this tension.

And as we begin this reflection on irrational beliefs,

I ask you to bring to mind the qualities of empathy,

Congruence and unconditional personal regard.

Namely,

Empathy towards yourself.

Congruence to your values to who you are as a person.

And unconditional positive regard.

Keep all your judgments towards yourself aside.

These 13 irrational beliefs,

These common thought patterns,

Although they are meant to be exaggerated,

They tend to show up in our daily lives and can lead us to a place of stress or emotional distress.

So,

Let's begin to explore each of these beliefs and reflect on what this belief means to us and how it shows up in our life.

We start with the demand for approval,

The belief that we must be approved by everyone to feel worthwhile.

Maybe you feel anxious if your friends don't respond enthusiastically to your plans,

Thinking that their approval is essential.

Or at work,

You constantly seek praise from your boss and feel worthless without receiving this praise.

Reflect on how does seeking approval affect your actions and decisions?

And can you recall a time when you prioritized others' approval over your own values?

And to offer a reframe,

You can repeat after me either in your mind or out loud.

While it's pleasant to be liked and approved of,

My self-worth isn't dependent on others.

I can value myself independently.

Moving to the next belief,

High self-expectations,

The belief that one must be thoroughly competent and successful in all respects to be considered worthwhile.

Sometimes we make a minor mistake,

A minor error,

And we feel that it reflects on our competence.

Or maybe we berate ourselves when we don't excel in a new hobby immediately,

Believing that we must be naturally talented at everything.

How do unrealistic self-expectations influence your self-esteem?

And how could you be kinder to yourself?

And you can repeat the reframe.

Striving for excellence is fine,

But it's okay to make mistakes.

My worth isn't defined by my achievements.

Moving on to the next belief,

Blame,

The belief that people who act badly deserve to be blamed and punished.

You get angry at a colleague because they made a minor mistake.

You believe they should be severely criticized.

Or you blame yourself harshly for forgetting a small detail,

Thinking you deserve to feel guilty.

So how does blaming others or yourself impact your relationships and personal growth?

How does blaming others or yourself impact your relationships and personal growth?

How does blaming others or yourself impact your relationships and personal growth?

And you can repeat the reframe.

Everyone makes mistakes,

Including myself.

It's more productive to focus on solutions and learning rather than blaming.

The next belief,

Awfulizing or catastrophizing.

The tendency to see situations as worse than they are,

Believing them to be catastrophic.

You spill coffee on a report and immediately think my career is over.

Or you've made plans with your best friend and they cancel on you.

And you feel that your entire day is ruined.

Can you identify a decent time when you made a situation seem worse than it was?

And how might a more balanced view of the situation have helped you?

And you can repeat the reframe.

While setbacks can be disappointing,

They are not the end of the world.

I can handle setbacks and move forward.

The next belief,

Low frustration tolerance.

The belief that discomfort or inconvenience is intolerable.

You become extremely irritated waiting in a long line thinking I can't stand this.

Or you're faced with a challenging task and you feel overwhelmed and avoid it.

Thinking it's too hard to handle.

In your day-to-day life,

How do you typically respond to frustration?

In your day-to-day life,

How do you typically respond to frustration?

And are there any strategies that you could use to increase your tolerance?

And you can repeat the reframe.

Discomfort is a part of life and I can tolerate it.

I can choose to respond calmly and constructively.

The next belief,

Emotional control.

The belief that one's emotions are controlled by external events and people.

A stranger was rude to you and you feel upset all day.

You believe that they ruined your mood.

Or your partner or significant other is in a bad mood.

And you also feel obligated to feel down.

Thinking that your happiness depends on them.

How often do you feel like others control your emotions?

And what can you do to take more responsibility for your emotional well-being?

And you can repeat the reframe.

While others' actions can influence me,

I have complete control over my emotional responses.

The next belief,

Avoidance.

The belief that avoiding problems is easier than facing them.

Maybe you avoid discussing finances with your partner,

Fearing the conversation will be uncomfortable.

Or you put off a difficult project at work,

Hoping that the issue will resolve by itself.

What problems have you been avoiding?

What problems have you been avoiding?

What problems have you been avoiding?

And what steps can you take to start addressing them?

And you can repeat the reframe.

Avoiding problems often makes them worse.

It's healthier to confront and resolve issues directly.

The next belief,

Dependency.

The belief that one must rely on others for support and guidance.

Maybe you can't make decisions without consulting your partner first.

Or you're feeling insecure about your own judgment.

Or you hesitate to take on new responsibilities at work without constant reassurance from your supervisor or your colleagues.

In what areas of your life do you feel overly dependent?

And how can you build confidence in your own judgment?

And you can repeat the reframe.

While it's okay to seek support,

I can also trust my abilities and make decisions independently.

The next belief,

Fear of change.

The belief that because something bad happened before,

It will continue to happen.

Maybe after a difficult breakup you avoid new relationships,

Fearing that they will end the same way.

Fearing that they will end the same way.

Or you stay in an unfulfilling job,

An unfulfilling career,

Because you're afraid a new job might be worse.

How has fear of change limited your life?

How has fear of change limited your life?

And what new opportunities could you explore if you let go of this fear?

And you can repeat the reframe.

The past doesn't dictate the future.

The past doesn't dictate the future.

I can learn from past experiences and approach new situations with an open mind.

The next belief,

Fear of failure.

The belief that one must be certain of success before attempting anything.

You avoid applying for a dream job because you're afraid of rejection.

Or you refrain from learning a new skill thinking you won't be good at it,

Fearing embarrassment.

What risks have you avoided due to fear of failure?

What risks have you avoided due to fear of failure?

And how could embracing failure as a learning experience change your approach?

And you can repeat the reframe.

Failure is a part of learning and growth.

I can take risks and learn from the outcomes regardless of success.

The next belief,

Perfectionism.

The belief that one must find the perfect solution to every problem.

You spend hours drafting an email,

Unable to send it until you think it's perfect.

You continually devise a project never feeling satisfied enough to submit it.

How has perfectionism helped you?

How has perfectionism affected your productivity and well-being?

What would happen if you accepted good enough?

And you can repeat the reframe.

Perfectionism is an unrealistic goal.

Perfectionism is an unrealistic goal.

It is more practical to do my best and accept imperfections.

The next belief,

External control.

The belief that one's life is controlled by external forces.

You feel stuck in your current situation,

Whether it's a relationship,

Whether it's a job,

Whether it's a career.

You feel stuck in your current situation,

Believing external circumstances are preventing change.

Or you think your happiness depends on external factors like your happiness depends on external factors like a partner,

A job,

A house,

A car,

A phone.

In what areas do you feel powerless?

In what areas of your life do you feel powerless?

And how can you take responsibility for the aspects of your life that you can control?

And you can repeat the reframe.

While I can't control everything,

I have the power to make choices and influence my circumstances.

And the last belief,

Over-generalization.

The belief that a single negative event will always happen in the future.

You fail a test once and you believe you're bad at the subject and always will be.

You fail a test once and you believe you're bad at the subject and always will be.

Or you have a bad experience at a party and conclude that all social events are unpleasant.

Have you ever let one negative experience color your view of similar situations?

Have you ever let one negative experience color your view of similar situations?

And how can you challenge this tendency?

And you can repeat the reframe.

One or two or three negative experiences don't define all future experiences.

Each situation is unique and I can approach new opportunities with an open mind.

Each situation is unique and I can approach new opportunities with an open mind.

So as we conclude this guided reflection,

Think about how these irrational beliefs may have influenced your thoughts,

Your emotions,

Your actions.

Think about how these irrational beliefs may have influenced your thoughts,

Your emotions,

Your actions.

Recognizing these patterns is a crucial step towards change.

Challenge and reframe these beliefs.

And in challenging and reframing the beliefs,

You can cultivate a more balanced,

A more resilient mindset.

And you can improve your overall well-being.

And take a couple of deep breaths.

Let the reframes sink in.

And when you are ready,

You can open your eyes.