If I had one meaningful thing to convey here,
It would be,
Unbecome yourself to become yourself.
Unbecome the self that fits in,
That conforms,
That always does the right thing,
That always looks good,
That seeks approval,
That appeals to the societal authorities that were given,
That were accidents of birth,
And not chosen.
All the parts of yourself that you rejected when you were forming your strict ideas of who you are,
They're still fair game to pick up and run with.
We all feel that desire to break away once each of us finds the rules that they've currently been playing by to be too confining,
Self-limiting.
When you find that you've been repeating the same patterns with the same tired outcomes,
It's time for a change.
Look to those character traits that you've rejected because they pose too much of a threat to your identity.
After all,
You've always been too polite to be outspoken,
So you've rejected speaking your mind,
Too forgiving to hold a grudge,
And so you reject your sense of justice,
Too independent to be loyal to others,
And thus you reject your selflessness,
Too strong to be vulnerable with anyone,
Too ugly to be attractive,
Too cautious to be intuitive,
Too free to be invested,
Too dependent to be alone,
And the list goes on and on and on.
What was presented to you as off-limits,
According to your caretakers,
Your church,
Your peers,
Is up until this moment being reinforced and policed by you,
Yourself.
But in truth,
It has always been at your disposal to decide what rules you live by.
It has always been.
There are no right moves,
There are no wrong answers.
All moves in the plentiful games of life are neutral.
What are these games?
Any situation or area in your life where there are participants,
Rules,
And a preferred outcome.
Once the hand-me-down rulebook has served its purpose,
Identify the game you want to play,
Learn the rules,
And make your absolute best moves and watch how the world around you is keeping score to give you feedback.
Most is how you create a unique game plan using what you have at hand,
And you learn so much faster by playing.
Any principles you hold true are tools,
And your emotional states are resources for you to use in order to bring an adaptive game changer to light.
The same way you wouldn't try to play poker using the rules of Monopoly,
You won't get anywhere trying to get what you want out of each different situation in life by using the same rulebook that you've carried around since childhood.
Whatever situation you want to enter and come out on top,
You have to learn the rules.
If you know the rules you want to play by,
Then find the game that goes along with them.
Use your principles to guide you to what's really important.
Use your emotions as fuel to do what needs to be done.
Don't let these tools and resources become the focus.
They aren't meant to control you,
They're meant to be extensions of who you are in this world.
These are the aspects of you that you once left behind,
But you can now know your identity as both and rather than either or.
Both polite and outspoken.
Both independent and selfless.
Both strong and vulnerable at times.
The game and the rules are always meant to be your choice,
And they always have been.
Not everyone plays a certain game the same way,
Or plays two games with the same intention.
When playing a game you want to get the most out of it,
And knowing your approach is the key to making it far.
It's important to note that there are three approaches and priorities when playing any game,
And I'll leave you with my perspectives and understanding on each one of them.
One is having fun and participating.
If participating is what's important to you,
It's crucial that you give yourself an easy win.
Your motivation comes from seeing yourself represented in your field,
And you won't show up unless you can make it to your goals.
Goals that are too far off and take too long to reach will kill your spirit.
Winning.
If winning is important to you,
Above all else,
It's crucial that you allow yourself to participate in games that you know you won't win.
And even in games that you know you can't win.
Put yourself around people who you have something to learn from,
And doing so,
And submitting yourself to loss.
You face your own humanity,
Join humanity,
And find yourself humbled,
Grounded,
And thereby empathetic towards others.
If watching the game is what's important to you,
And learning all the moves from afar,
Allow yourself to join in the game and play.
This will invigorate you,
Add to your life experience,
And show you your own personal power.
This will invigorate you,
Add to your life experience,
And show you your own personal power to influence.
Remember,
All moves are neutral.
All bets are off.
If you're not winning,
Change the game you're playing,
Or change the rules you're playing by.
Thank you for listening.
