Me Is Disorder, The Very Core Of Disorder

**Note: Truth does not always sound pleasant. If the mind is not really peaceful now, it might not be a perfect moment to listen to this podcast, one has to be aware of the emotions or reactions that can block one from listenING ATTENTIVELY and with HUMILITY.

This talk is a meditation practice. What one needs to do is listen attentively, without getting stuck in words, examine the mind in silence, no agree or disagree, just look at the mind as it is. Doing so is already a meditation practice.

Transcript

Me is also this order.

The me is the very coin of this order in life.

Me first.

Everything that has taken place in my life is based on me.

I want to be something.

I want to achieve something.

I want to become something.

I want to have something.

All my life starts from this center which is called me.

The me is a seeking pleasure because me is full of fear.

Fear not to be somebody or something.

Fear not to achieve something.

Fear not to have something.

When having something,

The me fears to lose it.

All kinds of forms fear.

Anxiety,

Worry,

Anger is there.

They are all part of this disorder and the me is the very coin of this disorder.

A life which is full of fear,

Worry,

Anxiety,

Doubt,

All kinds of turbulence is life in disorder.

Look around this world.

Most people are living in disorder.

They keep it to their own.

They hide it but the disorder is there.

We try to maintain the superficial decency but beneath it the tremendous disorder is there.

And this world has all kinds of disorder ultimately which are all the projection always in the disorder.

Without seeing the disorder in me as me,

I can't really see the disorder ultimately because the mind here is conditioned on me thinking that me is a supernormal concept.

I'm an individual.

I take responsibility for myself.

Me is always first because everybody thinks in the same way.

Holding on to this concept,

The mind is already in disorder and the mind is confused about its suffering.

All kinds mental challenges,

Restlessness,

Aggression,

Anger,

Loneliness.

All kinds desire with their strong force to lead one to new way.

In this individual world,

All kinds desires has been justified.

That's my legal interest.

In all kinds of conflict,

Law,

Perpetuate and justify the desire from me.

Therefore,

Perpetuating the conflict.

The conflicts of the interest is actually the conflict of me.

All of these are part of the disorder.