What's left for me to do?
How do I want to contribute?
What's the best use of my energy?
These are some of the questions that come up for me every morning as I free write in my journal.
I have some answers that I want to share and a couple of practices that are giving me new purpose every single day.
I know for me,
A lot of my friends,
50s,
60s,
70s,
Continue to ask this question.
What's left for me to do.
One thing's for sure is I don't need to prove myself anymore.
I'm done with that.
The hustle is over.
The chase is complete.
There's no way I'm going back to doing what I used to do.
But yet I have so much energy left to continue to share.
You may feel the same way.
We're not done yet.
So how do we spend this time,
This energy?
How do we share our experience and even our wisdom as we get older?
I've asked this question a lot,
And I have some answers.
The one that keeps coming up for me is be the example.
Be the example.
It reminds me of that Gandhi quote,
Be the change you wish to see in the world.
People are not looking for more advice.
They're looking for examples,
For proof.
Proof of what it means to age well.
Proof of what it means to be happy,
To flourish,
To live with vitality and curiosity.
We're all looking for proof in others.
So I think one of the greatest gifts we can give to the world as we get older is to be the example.
And you get to choose what example you want to be.
So what is left for me to do?
I have a lot of ideas,
But these three practices continue to come up for me and they continue to sit at the top of the list.
They're a really good use of my energy and my time,
And I feel like they're a really good way to continue to contribute to the world.
The first one is to be kind.
Yeah,
It's that simple.
If we wish to see more kindness in the world,
Then it starts with us.
Be kind.
So I've sat with this a long time.
I have been practicing my own loving kindness practices for decades now,
And it's really been a game changer for me.
To be kind,
We start with how we talk to ourselves.
How we judge ourselves,
The negative speak,
That inner critic that continues to come up.
To start to become aware.
Of that language that we're using and to start shifting it.
So what I've learned from my meditation teacher,
Scott McBride.
Is one of the simplest ways to start to be kind to yourself is to watch how you speak to yourself.
And then start changing that tone of voice.
Start to speak to yourself like you speak to your pet.
Or a young child.
We often speak so kindly and with such patience and compassion to those pets of ours and to little toddlers and of course to babies.
Can we start to turn that towards ourself?
So starting to speak more kindly towards yourself,
And this has been definitely the case for me,
It has built a new level of patience and compassion for others.
So watch the way you speak to yourself.
And another great practice that I have done for years,
And I've talked about many,
Many times,
Is this practice called there there,
Sweetheart.
There,
There,
Sweetheart.
Again,
Learned this from my meditation teacher.
Think about the.
Kind grandmother or that loving figure in your life that always consoled you when you were down and out or you skinned your knee.
And they just say,
They're their sweetheart.
And so the practice is to start thinking that towards yourself.
You can say it out loud,
You can say it in your head when you fumble,
When you drop something,
When you say something you didn't mean,
When you're just in a little bit of a struggle,
To say to yourself,
There,
There,
Sweetheart.
Doing this and building this kind of muscle,
This kindness muscle inward.
Is going to help you change how you show up in the world.
It did for me.
Listen,
I was such a hard head when it came to loving kindness practice and it changed my life.
So to be kind out there,
We have to start now.
With ourselves,
Right?
It's obvious,
I know,
But maybe you needed to hear that today.
So then we start to show up in the world as the example of kindness.
As the example of somebody who has patience and compassion.
Who's there to support and share with others.
And listen,
It can start on the road when you're driving or in the grocery store.
It can start in how you show up on a phone call with a support person.
It can show up with your family.
How can you show up as the example?
Of kindness.
More and more.
I'll tell you what,
The world could use us all,
All of us listening and watching here today.
If we all showed up just a little bit kinder,
It would ripple out.
People soften,
They slow,
They relax their shoulders when they greet somebody.
That's kind to them.
So be kind is one of my top priorities when it comes to being the example.
I'm not perfect.
Trust me,
I still am.
Mutter under my breath.
In fact,
Just this morning coming back from the gym,
I was behind somebody very slow.
I caught myself,
I was muttering not so kind words because I wanted to get home.
So it happens and then we just say there there sweetheart,
There you go again.
So be kind is my one of my number one practices for being the example.
The second one is to be grounded.
To be stable.
To be steady,
To be that steady force out there.
I've talked about this here on my channel.
When we are steady,
It helps to steady others.
When we speak intentionally.
When we move slowly.
When we pause often.
When we listen.
Without interruption.
It changes the atmosphere of the room.
And actually changes others' states of being.
So showing up as grounded,
Calm,
Steady,
And present.
It helps others slow their energy down as well.
Not all the time.
Sometimes people aren't such speed that You just,
No matter how slowly you speak or how slowly you move,
They're going to just barrel right through.
And that's OK.
You can have compassion for them.
But for us,
If we want to be the example out there of what it means to be grounded,
If we want to show proof to others that yes,
It is possible to be productive in the world,
Without being overly speedy and hyper.
Then we learn to show up.
What are the best ways for me to remind myself?
To be grounded.
Is this idea of finding your feet.
Right,
It comes out of yoga practice.
In most yoga poses that are standing,
We start by just finding our feet in the pose.
So right now,
If you can,
If you're not driving,
Just find your feet,
Just place your feet on the ground and maybe press into your big toes.
And then your pinky toes.
And then all five toes.
And then your heels and just find your feet beneath you.
What's amazing about doing that is it just starts to slow yourself down.
It starts to slow that speed down.
So,
To be the example of what it means to be grounded,
We have to start once again with ourselves.
And I'll tell you what.
What's amazing about showing up as grounded is that not only does it shift our nervous system,
Not only does it Slow our breath down.
And slow our heart rate down.
But others will entrain to us.
In other words,
We synchronize with each other's energies and states of being.
So as they say,
The rising tide lifts all boats or ships.
Definitely in this case when we are Calm,
Steady,
Clear,
Grounded.
We help others to find a new way.
Or a new state of being,
Just like that,
Just by being.
Just by being proof.
The third practice that is top of the list for me when it comes to being the example out there.
Is to be happy.
Now,
I'm not talking about toxic positivity.
I'm not talking about,
You know,
Faking it till you make it.
But we can start to shift that kind of ground level state of ours to live in more abundance and possibility.
And less scarcity and negativity.
So to be happy.
For me,
It starts with gratitude.
Every morning again with that journal.
And sometimes I just write down three or four things that I am grateful for.
Oftentimes I start with just my breath and being alive and feeling healthy.
And then the nature around me,
This gorgeous season of summer in Maine.
There's not much to not like and be happy about.
And then just having the ability to have a warm cup of coffee.
Time to reflect,
Whatever it is.
That gratitude practice,
What it does is it stirs up the feel good hormones.
It stirs up serotonin and dopamine.
It makes us feel good.
Scientifically proven that gratitude works to really lift our mood.
So we start with ourselves,
And then we carry it out to others.
There's a lot of negativity in this world,
All you need to do is just open up your phone and it just comes blasting out at you.
We can do our part to really shift that.
The energy,
The states of others by just being more joyful.
Feeling more abundant.
Feeling more curious about the possibilities and hopeful.
About the possibilities that are available to us all.
Simple.
Be the change you wish to see in the world,
As Gandhi said.
Be the example of what it means to be kind.
To be grounded,
To be happy.
And those are just three.
There are so many other ways that we can be the example,
Be the example of wellness.
Be the example of creativity.
Be the example of whatever it is that makes your heart sing.
And just do it and go all in.
We will all benefit.
From you being the proof of whatever it is that you are passionate and enthusiastic about.
So what I ask myself.
How can I be of help here at 62?
How can I continue to contribute to the world?
What do I have left to do?
Yes,
There are many,
Many things that I want to continue to do,
One of which are these videos.
Grateful for this opportunity to be able to share with you all my passions for awakening and for being fully engaged and alive in this lifetime.
And there's more,
There's more that I plan to do.
But for me,
The ways that I feel like I can super contribute.
Every single day purposefully.
Are those three practices.
Be kind.
Be grounded.
Be happy.
