Welcome to the Bliss Talk.
We speak about what helps us get lit,
What helps us to light up,
And what helps us to lighten up.
All in the backdrop of a maybe grey November.
I've always had the sense that November is a pretty grey month and it took me a while to become friends with it.
So,
Because I love being in the sun so much,
It can be hard for me when the days become really short.
And therefore,
Each year I set out on a quest to make my November more colourful.
And one fun little mission to get me there this year was to find a bright yellow wool dress in a second hand store.
And by wrapping myself in bright colours,
It helps me brighten my mood.
Now,
That might not be everybody's jam and it doesn't have to be.
My point with the yellow dress is to illustrate what colour would you like your day to be.
And maybe it is something that you find as a representation around you.
Maybe it's something that happens internally.
Maybe it is a root chakra day and maybe everything will be red and cosy.
Because one of the beautiful things about November is we get to turn inward a bit more.
We get to listen.
We get to come home to ourselves and be with whatever arises.
And those could be uncomfortable things.
There could be discomfort.
When we turn inwards to face ourselves,
We may find some challenges there.
And there could be lovely surprises.
Maybe your colour is orange or your creativity.
Your life force energy running through you.
Maybe it's yellow for a centre of manifestation and willpower.
Maybe it's green for the heart.
Maybe it's green for expressing all the lushness of nature around us.
Maybe it's dark blue for the expression of our voice.
And because with that we can blend into the night.
Maybe it's indigo,
Dark purple for the third eye.
For tuning into the world beyond our five senses.
And maybe it's pure white or all the rainbow colours for your crown chakra that connects you with everything beyond.
With your higher self.
With the person that you're becoming.
And with everything else there is.
So colour is one way of how I shift moods and allow myself to be intentional about how I approach a day.
That can also include treating myself to fresh flowers.
And another piece of the allowing myself to come home and be with what is,
Is to get really cosy in my space and to allow myself to be there for a while.
That includes lighting some candles.
For when I do my practices.
And simply because I like it.
It's a reminder of the simple ways.
And a reminder that when I seek distraction outside that there is something inside that I don't want to be with.
So I get to question that.
I get to question that in the most loving way.
There is no need to be overly critical with myself.
There is a need to be very loving to myself.
To remind myself that I got me.
I'm here for me.
I take really good care of myself.
And that also manifests in how I speak to myself in my head.
Now let's be real.
I'm also in training on that one.
As much as you.
I'm one of you.
I don't always get it right.
And then I catch myself.
And I do better.
And I notice that days that I got myself really well are also the days that the people around me feel best.
It's not so much in what I say.
It's how I show up and how I treat myself.
Sometimes it feels like we are giving each other permission.
When we treat ourselves well.
I feel inspired when I see my friends treating themselves well.
It's a good reminder for me to do the same.
And it goes both ways.
So the more I take the time to light myself up.
By meditation,
By going on walks in nature,
By singing,
By feeling my soul in every situation.
The more that light shines out into the world.
Not by me preaching about it.
By me being it and shining the light.
And we can turn on that inner light.
And that's why morning practice is so magic.
If we can turn it on in the morning.
It will shine outward for the rest of the day.
And our evening practice is really important to bring us back home.
And to let go of everything that's not part of us so we can restore and recharge really deeply.
When we take the time for a morning practice.
On some days I may find that it's a bit challenging.
Some days I seem to have a gnarly head on my shoulders.
I don't know if that ever happens to you that your head seems to be a bit grumpy and it's throwing around not so kind thoughts.
Maybe I'm the only one.
I don't think I am.
On those days when I realize that I have a really tough time observing and not getting wrapped up in the thoughts.
I will allow myself to use inspirational reading.
To use and enjoy a poem by Rumi to remind me of what really matters.
Or when it's one of my crazy too tightly scheduled run around days.
Because yeah those also happen.
Then maybe I put a lecture by Ram Dass on my ears.
To get myself into a good space.
Maybe I overslept and I find myself running after my morning instead of running the morning.
And as I'm on my way to the office.
Maybe I managed to put a guided meditation on my ears and even though I may not be as 100% present with it as I wish.
Because I need to make sure that I don't run against the lantern post.
Allowing myself to receive that soothing guidance and to dedicate as much attention and presence to it as I can in my circumstance.
That can make a huge shift in the day.
So this is not a pass to skimp on our morning practice.
This is an invitation to make it happen no matter what.
And on the days where it's challenging to allow ourselves to modify it instead of dropping it.
That has allowed me to be very consistent with it over the years.
I do my due diligence in practicing in a quiet space at home or wherever I happen to be.
And if that is really not possible at a given time.
We can talk about the word possible.
It's always about choices.
So if on a given day I decide to make different choices because my time planning was off or whatever.
Then I will give myself some leeway in how I handle it and make sure that it does happen one way or another.
So it's an invitation to be not black and white about it.
To be inclusive about it.
Because I know that I will show up differently for my day when I've done my morning practice.
Also a modified one.
There is more to lighting up our world than the morning practices.
There is the attention with which we walk through the day.
There is enjoying every sip of a cup of hot something.
There is noticing the birds in the sky.
There is throwing my head back and laughing at my human experience.
When I catch myself taking everything very seriously.
It happens to me.
Sometimes I get very caught up in being very serious about my experience.
And then I get to remind myself that's all here for me.
And that no matter how much I may be kicking and screaming inside.
That if I perceive my outer circumstances as contrasting to what I wish my experience to be.
How do I shift that?
Oh yeah,
By shifting my inner perception and experience.
And by sometimes accepting that I can analyze all I want and it will not necessarily drop in at that time what I'm supposed to learn.
I had one of these incidents yesterday.
I was not liking what was happening.
And I noticed my head was so hard trying to figure out knowing that it's all happening for me.
Why?
What am I supposed to learn here?
And then at some point I realized.
Maybe it's not time yet for me to understand.
Maybe it's time for me to feel the contrast.
To feel the discomfort.
Because what I'm doing right now by trying to analyze it is one way of resisting the discomfort.
So let me feel the discomfort.
And things will clear up.
Who knows?
Maybe I am feeling the discomfort because I'm supposed to know that this is hard.
And that it takes effort to go where I wish to go.
Sometimes the answers are very simple.
And yes,
The analytical mind loves trying to figure things out.
It also likes to make itself most important by doing that.
It tries to tell us that we have to figure this out.
Maybe it's better to feel it out instead of figuring it out.
Feeling it out and see what's there to learn.
Sometimes that is the voice of the ego.
Sometimes that is the voice of the ego.
In one way or another.
And there is nothing bad about it.
It's noticing who's speaking.
And giving our minds some grace and kindness for that as well.
Not trying to shove it in the corner.
Instead appreciating it and say,
Thank you.
I know you're doing your best to help.
And right now let me feel what's going on.
Because I'm really resisting feeling it.
Because it's uncomfortable.
And maybe I'll learn something from feeling it.
Speaking about the thank you.
For me gratitude is one of the most important practices.
The gratitude for showing up somewhere and having a single person take the time to be with me.
Whether that is a friend I meet for a drink.
Whether that is a student that comes to class.
Whether that is a participant in my life guided meditation.
Every single soul matters.
If I manage to brighten somebody's day a little bit,
One person,
That's worth my effort for showing up.
And if on a given day not a single person were to show up,
Then I get to be grateful to myself for showing up.
For standing in for what matters to me.
For following what I perceive my purpose.
And my service.
Independent of the approval from the outside.
The approval from the outside.
So if I am in congruence with what I wish to stand for,
I get to be grateful to myself and I get to be grateful to all the circumstances around me that enable me to do that.
Whether that is the school where I teach or the yoga studio or the online platform or the cafe where I happen to meet that friend.
All of it was put into place to allow me to show up and do my part.
Yeah,
It wasn't exclusively put into place for that and I get to be grateful that it's there.
I get to be grateful that I have a very capable body that allows me to do so many things.
It can breathe air.
It can make sounds.
It can make words.
I'm allowed to see.
I'm allowed to hear.
Hear all the beautiful sounds and the contrasting ones.
To appreciate the variety of voices,
Of bird songs,
Of music.
To be able to communicate.
I get to appreciate my nose and its capacity to smell.
To smell the scent of the flowers and the scent of the rotten food.
Did you just think,
Eww,
I want to smell that?
Why?
It's a safety function of our system,
Right?
It may not be a pleasant smell.
And it reminds us,
Oh yeah,
I cooked that four days ago and maybe it's not good anymore.
I know,
That was a silly example.
Smelling all the fresh herbs that can go into what we cook.
Taking the time to appreciate the food that we get to enjoy.
This is a constant practice for me because I sometimes do have the bad habit of eating,
Standing in my kitchen,
Quickly putting some food in my mouth to keep going.
I cheat on myself every time I do that.
And I know it.
So I get to be very diligent with my practice here,
Putting it together nicely on a plate and being in a proper eating space.
What else is there to appreciate so much every single day?
Yesterday I took the ferry to work.
I get to take the ferry across the river or I get to cycle around to the next bridge.
My choice.
And I remember every time I'm on my bicycle and every time I'm on the ferry,
What a beautiful thing that is.
I get to ride my bike to work.
Yeah,
It's wet and cold and dark and I need to put on a ridiculous amount of clothes at the moment.
And I get to move outside in the elements.
It's exciting.
And I get to be on a boat if I want to.
And the same when I was traveling a few weeks ago.
That was part of a 6-lane freeway traffic.
I get to drive a car.
That's a lot of privilege.
And I get to roll through Southern California in that case.
What an amazing adventure.
When I get to sit in the tram,
Looking at the other people,
Noticing how my head starts spinning stories about them.
And then pulling back,
Being curious.
What's the energy that I can truly sense from them?
And is there a person that needs to receive a smile because they're having a rough day?
Yeah,
Most people may be hanging out a bit in their own bubble with a headset in their head and their phone.
Maybe they're in a live meditation.
Who knows?
Maybe they're listening to a beautiful piece of music.
And I remember having a conversation with a friend years ago who was taken aback by how many people on public transport were in their phones and kind of shut off from the world with their headphones.
And I said,
Yes,
I get it.
And maybe that's exactly what they need to decompress right now from a workday.
To be in their own music bubble because it's intense to be so close together with so many people in a crowded metro,
For example.
It is one way of how we get to come home into our own bubble.
So it's less about when am I plugged into technology.
It's more about why and what for.
How do I use it?
The more intentional my use,
The more beneficial it can be.
And having that conversation with that friend has helped me,
First of all,
Be more intentional about my own use and second,
Not be judgy about other people's use of it.
Because what do I know?
What do I know what is going on in their head at a given time?
How they feel?
Maybe they have Louis Armstrong's What a Wonderful World in their ears and it allows them to dance inside while they sit through their commute.
Music.
A wonderful way of uplifting ourselves.
By the way,
It's one of my favorite things when I have a grumpy head on my shoulders to sing.
When I notice that my mind starts going routes and I don't wish to go down again.
One easy way to break my thinking habits is to chant.
And sometimes that is a spiritual chant.
Sometimes I get all wrapped up in singing Hare Krishna.
Sometimes it's an Ammani Padme Hum.
Sometimes I sing about the earth elements.
And sometimes it's stillness in motion.
And sometimes it's whichever random pop song from the 80s drops into my head and then a line or two gets stuck there.
Oh yeah,
That happens a lot.
And maybe then I'll put on that song and dance.
It's a good way to get back into the body because we spend so much time in our heads.
Let's dance.
Let's sing.
Let's remember the beauty of the world every single day,
Every single hour.
And at the end of the day,
How do we wrap up our day with gratitude?
How can I remember all the beauty that has happened on a given day?
Gratitude journaling is a beautiful way to do that.
I have a couple of friends who will do it with their partner or their kids before they say goodnight.
I will say tell me one to three things that you loved about your day today.
It's such a beautiful practice.
I will sometimes do that gratitude practice when I lay down.
Truth be told,
I'm usually down for the count.
I can count backwards from three and I'll be asleep.
So sometimes I don't get beyond the first thing.
And I know it's a blessing to be able to fall asleep quickly.
If for you that takes some time,
A gratitude journaling practice is one beautiful way of getting you into that space.
Yes.
Reconnecting inside,
Reconnecting with gratitude.
While knowing there are other things going on in the world,
Us taking the time to turn inward,
To recharge,
Does not mean we don't care about what's going on in the world or that we turn a blind eye to it.
It means we need a break to recharge so that we can then fully show up for the world again.
It's important.
We get to honor ourselves for that.
For caring and for needing to recharge.
It's a reflection of that diligent self-care.
We can only serve in the world if we take good care of ourselves and recharge.
And the gratitude practice allows us to get into that space.
Gratitude is receiver mode.
And when we go to rest in that state,
We can receive the best recharge we can get.
And if you have a really hard time winding down,
Do a breathing practice.
7 to 15 minutes of will help you deeply relax your nervous system.
You can always come back to my recordings for that.
So that's been a little run over the course of the day from our morning practice to how we treat our everyday surroundings.
To how we remind ourselves to appreciate all the little moments that we get to winding down with a gratitude practice at night.
All of it allowing yourself to lighten up that day,
To lighten your load and to light up your day.
And the more we light up,
The more we shine that into the world.
And the happier you are,
Maybe the more likely you are to add some random acts of kindness.
They're not a requirement.
They're an icing on the cake,
A cherry on top if you will.
Because that next person may be as appreciative of you reaching out with a beautiful gesture as you would be.
Maybe they're not finding the courage yet.
Because you have so much courage inside and you have so much love inside that wants to be shared with the world.
We often shy back because we feel that we might get judged for something.
Yeah,
That could happen.
There's no protection against that.
Is that a reason to not do it?
We might be judged either way.
So maybe it's an internal excuse.
And maybe we do it because we're a little afraid of it.
Because every time we grow beyond that fear,
We build our courage muscles.
It's a workout too.
A mental and emotional one.
Building up our courage muscles.
This is my invitation for you to take away from this talk.
The invitation for one,
Starting your day deliberately with a morning practice of your choice.
Number two,
Cultivating the attitude of gratitude.
And three,
Having the courage to love and to put that love out there into the world.
Independent of how it might be received.
A morning practice,
An attitude of gratitude and the courage to love.
And maybe you could find a few minutes to journal about this.
To take it deeper and to find a commitment to yourself.
Of how you're starting to put that into practice from today onwards.
I would love to hear how you intend to do that.
And thank you for being here.
For taking this time to invest in yourself and to take care of yourself.
