RAIN For Difficult Emotions

A structured practice for moving through difficulty: recognizing what's here, acknowledging it, investigating with curiosity, and offering care to the most vulnerable parts of yourself. RAIN is an acronym developed in the mindfulness tradition as a way of working with strong emotional experiences. This is a longer practice, designed to go slowly. And if, at any time, it becomes overwhelming, you can always pause and come back when you're ready.

Transcript

This is a practice for working with difficult emotions. It's called RAIN, Which is an acronym and stands for Recognize, Accept, Investigate, And Nurture. Some use non-identification for the N, And if that works better for you, You're welcome to use that here. You don't need to remember the acronyms. I'll guide you through them. So let's begin gently. If the world has felt loud, Challenging, Or fast today, You might imagine turning down the volume slightly, Just for these minutes. The news will be here later. Your responsibilities will be here later. Right now, Noticing what is physically here. This room, This temperature, This support beneath you, Letting your shoulders drop a fraction, Relaxing the eyelids, Letting the jaw soften. We're not trying to solve anything right now. We are arriving and slowly letting attention move inward toward the breath, Toward the body, Toward the heart. You might now bring to mind a situation in which you feel caught up. I wouldn't choose something that involves trauma, But something that feels workable within this session. It might be a disagreement with someone close to you or a challenging reaction to the news. It might be a situation with your own health or loved ones. Whatever it is, We'll work to help move through it. And you don't have to try and figure out what the right thing is. If something comes up quickly for you, That's probably it. And often, What arises can be surprising. So we'll begin by recognizing what's present. What about this situation is challenging for you? Who or what was involved? Why is this important to you? What feeling is most dominant right now? You could name this softly to yourself. You might also find that other emotions arise underneath this one as you sit with it. And if it's supportive, You can also name those as they arise. The next step in RAIN is the A, Which is accept. Would it be okay to allow these feelings to be here for a few minutes? If this feels workable, We'll keep going. If it doesn't, There's a lot of wisdom in knowing when we've reached a limit. There's never a failure in stopping. We can always come back when we're ready and feel more resourced. So if you'd like to continue bringing these emotions in close again, Can you accept that they're here? Sometimes the word accept can feel like it means we have to like it. We don't have to enjoy the emotions that are present. For me, It often helps to use the word acknowledge instead of accept. It seems easier sometimes to acknowledge what's here. Just for now, Not forever. And as we move deeper to investigate this experience, The I of RAIN, What is it like for you right now? What are you aware of in your body? What wants your attention? Where does this emotion live in your body? You might bring your attention to that spot. For some, It helps to place a hand over it. Notice the sensations, Maybe tightening, Aching, Soreness, Or clenching. Do these sensations have a texture? Are they rough or smooth? Are they moving or stationary? Do they have a temperature? A color? What's it like to be living with this? What might you be unwilling to feel in this moment? You might sense into this vulnerable part of yourself and how long it's been here. How old is it? And as you sit with this, What might you be believing about yourself? And is it true? What would life look like if it were not true? And who would you be? And can you be with this experience without trying to change it right now? Again, Reminding you that you can stop at any time if it becomes too much. We're not trying to fix or solve anything. We're just getting familiar with what's here. Now, You might call on the most awake and loving part of yourself, Perhaps even your older self. This is for that nurture of RAIN. For many, It can help to call outside of ourselves, Perhaps on a spiritual presence or a mentor or an ancestor. And asking what this vulnerable part of you needs. How does it want to be met? And can you offer this to yourself? And if that's challenging, Can this spiritual presence or mentor or ancestor offer it to you? You might imagine them looking at you with kind, Loving eyes and imagining what they would say. You might sense the quality of this loving part of yourself or the one you've called in for support. Feeling it fill your body with warm light. Bigger than this experience. Capable of holding it. Trusting yourself. Trusting your goodness. Trusting that you are loving and lovable. You could take a moment to step back and witness yourself receiving this care. And you might notice that your awareness is big enough to hold it. As we begin to close this meditation, What do you want to remember and take with you? You might seal this in with a long, Deep breath. And in a few moments, I'll ring the bell to end the sitting. You can take your time coming back into your space. And I encourage you to do it with gentleness. Slowly taking in the air around you. Letting your body ease back into itself. Noticing your surroundings and the sounds around you. And whenever you're ready, You can return to your room.