Urge Surfing

This meditation is designed to help you respond in more healthy ways to urges or cravings that might normally sabotage you. Whether your normal pattern is an unhealthy relationship to food, drink, drugs, tobacco, anger, or some other form of self-harm, regular practice with this meditation will help to free you from old habits and develop a more serene response to life’s challenges.

Transcript

The urge surfing meditation was developed to help people to learn to respond to cravings in ways that are helpful and don't resort to damaging or self-destructive behaviours.

This practice is best conducted regularly to train the mind and body to not react to cravings,

To train the mind and body system that cravings go away of their own accord and that we don't need to act out self-destructive or damaging behaviours to make them go away.

Waiting till a craving is actively triggered and then trying to practice this meditation might not be the best time.

Regular and consistent practice will help to develop the skill of urge surfing so that when urges and cravings come in everyday life we are already well trained to ride out the craving or urge so that we can respond in health promoting ways.

When conducting this practice it's good if you can to make time to follow it with the mountain meditation.

The mountain meditation is a grounding practice that will help you to settle after conducting an urge surf.

When conducting the urge surf practice you'll be invited to bring up an experience,

Emotion,

Or situation that commonly triggers you to act in unhealthful ways.

It's really essential that when we begin urge surfing that we start with really manageable situations and don't trigger ourselves in ways that are going to sabotage us.

When choosing the situation,

Emotion or experience it's important that you start with experiences that are not too triggering.

We want to work up to the kind of experiences that really sabotage us by practicing on the things that maybe just irritate us.

So you might be thinking about being challenged to resist eating some chocolate,

To not snap at somebody,

But maybe not the kind of triggers that get you acting out in severely self-sabotaging ways.

So when you're ready,

Ensuring you're in a place where you'll ideally not be disturbed for the next 15 minutes.

You could choose to sit very upright in this practice to bring your full attention to your posture,

But it's equally acceptable to sit in a relaxed position in a comfy chair or be lying down.

Whatever posture you choose,

Begin to notice the position you've taken.

Notice where your body is touching against the support beneath you.

Be aware of the points of pressure,

The temperature at those points.

Maybe notice where there's fabric touching against your skin,

The texture.

Notice what your hands are touching,

Is there dryness or clammyness?

Scanning your mind through your body,

Do you notice any tension or relaxation as you scan through the body?

Are there areas of the body where you can't sense anything?

Just bringing your mind to your immediate presence.

Bring your mind to the breath,

Feeling the breath moving in the body.

Noticing whether you feel the breath most clearly at the nostrils,

The upper lip,

The throat.

Or do you feel the breath most clearly as the chest expands and contracts,

Or the belly?

Wherever you feel the breath most clearly,

Resting your attention there and returning your attention to this point moment by moment,

Noticing how each moment is slightly different as the sensations shift with the inhale.

Is there a momentary pause before the exhale?

Being particularly aware of these transitions between in-breath and out-breath.

Between out-breath and in-breath.

And being aware how sounds and thoughts catch the attention and take it off on some other journey.

As soon as we notice this,

Returning to the moment by moment physical sensations of the breath.

Not so much staying always focused on the breath as just observing this pattern of concentrated focus,

The attention being drawn away,

And then a coming back to concentrated focus once more.

Seeing this natural movement of the awareness.

Not trying to stay focused on the breath,

But just having it as an anchor point to return to whenever the attention wanders.

A constantly moving sensation in the body that we can always come back to no matter how difficult things become.

Tracing the movement of the breath with our attention.

All the way in.

All the way out.

Breath after breath.

And always being free to come back to this focused place no matter what is going on in our life.

The simplicity of the breath is not demanding anything of us.

When you're ready,

Bringing to mind a situation,

Experience or emotion that often in the past has triggered us to some minor way of acting against their own best interests.

It might be being pulled to eat some unhealthy food,

Being triggered to snap at some friend or family member,

Or wave our fist at someone in traffic.

Whatever the experience is,

Just noticing that situation in your mind's eye,

Getting a sense of what it feels like.

Maybe playing the situation through in your mind.

Who's involved?

Is anything being said or done?

Playing that situation through as vividly as we can to really get a sense of how it feels to be triggered in that way.

Noticing how we respond in our body to this situation.

Noticing what thoughts arise.

Noticing any emotional response.

Noticing if there's the inkling of any urge or craving to act in a way that isn't in our best interests.

Playing the situation through again,

Maybe even again two or three times,

To really vividly feel our way into this experience.

Allowing the craving to grow if it's there.

However in our imagination we're not going to act out on this craving or urge.

We're just playing through the situation to the point of feeling it.

Noticing the urge to act against our best interests to really come to fruition.

Bringing our attention to the craving itself.

Noticing the sensations in the body.

Noticing any intention to get rid of them,

To want to make them go away.

To notice how we're pulled to act in some way to try to get rid of these feelings.

But we're going to do something differently here.

Instead of turning away from this craving or urge,

We're turning towards it.

Studying the physical sensations in the body.

Really feeling the emotion wholeheartedly.

Noticing where in the body we feel it most.

Is it an all body feeling?

Or is it located in just particular places in the body?

If the mind wanders away,

Drawing the mind back.

Drawing the attention back to the difficult feeling in the body.

Allowing it to rise,

Allowing it to be fully felt.

And when we're thoroughly in touch with the urge or craving,

Just asking a simple question.

What is it in my heart of hearts that I really want?

Beneath the self sabotaging behaviour,

What is it that I'm really most deeply want in my heart of hearts?

Taking time for that answer to settle.

And returning to the breath.

Not to get away from the urge or craving,

But just allowing the urge or craving to be fully present as we attend to the breath alongside it.

Noticing once again the breath moving in the body in that place where we feel the breath most vividly.

Sensing the physical sensations of the inhale.

Maybe the belly expanding as we breathe in.

The movement of clothing over our skin.

Feeling the contraction as we breathe out.

It's only loosening of fabric against the body.

Paying full attention.

If it's to the nostrils or upper lip,

To the air movement.

Feeling the air entering the throat slightly cooler.

Leaving slightly warmer.

Feeling the full intensity of our current experience to be wholly felt in the breath.

Using the breath as a surfboard to ride out all the sensations we're experiencing in this moment.

Again and again returning to the breath moving in the body.

Feeling our urge or craving to be fully felt.

Allowing it to rise and allowing it to pass in its own time without acting on it.

Feeling again and again to the breath moving in the body.

Not trying to move away from or extinguish any experience,

But being fully present to all our experience.

Just keeping the breath centre stage in all of this.

Allowing our breath to be the platform upon which we observe all our experience.

Coming once more to this breath in this moment.

Again and again coming back to the breath.

Feeling the simplicity of the movement of the breath.

Noticing the sensations in the body.

Noticing any remnants of the urge or craving in the body.

Allowing them to be just as they are.

And returning to the breath.

Feeling just this breath,

Just this moment of this breath right now.

In this moment nothing is important but the breathing.

Our whole mind and body can be attending to just this breath.

Just the immediate sensation of this moment of this breath.

And continuing this as long as you need to.

When it's okay if there's some remnant of sensation in the body,

Some experience that's unresolved,

We don't need to fix anything.

Because we've always got the safety of our breath to return to at each moment of our life.

The simplicity of the breath doesn't require anything of us.

We don't need to change anything.

We can just return here.

So you might like to follow this meditation practice with the mountain meditation.

This grounding practice will really prepare you for whatever comes next.

Settling you in a resilient strength of being.

You might now like to reflect again on the question.

What is it that I really want?

Beneath the urge or craving?

What is it that my heart truly desires?

At the deepest level.

And how might I move towards this deeper wish?

What actions can I take from this calmer place to get my real needs met?

Reviews

Very, very helpful. Thank you 🙏

Grateful 🙏🏾

Love it, very smooth and going right into it. Thank you.

Great meditation without disturbing music or background noise. Thoughtful instructions. I would recommend this to my friends.

Really beautiful. I love that these meditations are addressing real experiences in such a helpful, supportive and transformative way. From the very first sentences I feel a shift, an undoing of the resistance. Thank you. 🙏🏻

Fabulous. Will return. Thank you and Blessings 🦋💜

a very helpful meditation, delivered by a soothing voice.

Thank you Devin. Such a well thought out and structured meditation. I found it truly helpful, I shall keep returning. 🙏🏼

so helpful to befriend and understand my craving and look within. thank you