You can spend years wanting something.
A new career,
A new life chapter,
Doing work you're passionate about.
And then you start taking steps towards it,
And you suddenly pull back.
You procrastinate,
Question whether you really want it,
Find a reason why now isn't the right time,
And we usually think,
I need more discipline.
I need more confidence.
I need to stop sabotaging myself.
But what if doing the work to get what you actually want isn't what you're resisting?
What if the scary part isn't failing?
But what you'd have to face.
If it worked out.
Because if it works.
.
.
You may have to be seen.
People get to respond to you.
More might be expected of you.
Your life may actually have to change.
And you may come to realize that the identity you've been living from no longer fits this new life chapter.
So in this video,
I want to show you why getting closer to the life you want can actually trigger the exact resistance that keeps you from stepping into it.
And how to recognize what you're actually protecting yourself from.
Before you start to pull away.
So if you're ready to get started.
Take a deep breath with me.
And let's walk through this together.
So we spend a lot of time in our lives asking,
How do I call in what I want?
How do I take the right steps?
How do I become the type of person?
That can create the life I want.
But once we start moving towards it.
.
.
It starts to feel real to our body.
And the question becomes that we never ask ourselves,
Can I actually receive what comes along with what I want?
Because it's one thing to want a new relationship.
Financial freedom,
A big audience,
A career or doing work that feels more true.
It's another thing to stay open when these things actually start to show up.
When intimacy gets close.
When someone is about to pay you.
When people start responding to what you're sharing and creating.
And now you have to step out of the old role that everyone expects from you.
So wanting something gives our desire a name.
It clarifies our intention.
But receiving.
Test our identity.
Because when the life you want starts happening for real,
It requires more from you than simply wanting it and even working toward it.
It will ask you to be seen in ways that you're not used to.
To be more responsible perhaps.
More accountable,
Or simply more willing to allow your current life to be disrupted in some way,
In a way that you're not used to.
And a part of that may feel exciting,
But there's a big part of that that will feel threatening.
Because your current life only knows how to hold the familiar version of yourself.
Think of it like this.
Imagine your life as a container.
The grander your dreams are,
And the richer the experiences you crave,
The bigger that container needs to be.
Because you can only comfortably hold what already feels familiar,
Safe,
And allowed to your current life.
And that container is not just your mindset,
It's your identity.
Your emotional baseline.
Your assumptions about yourself,
About others,
About how life works.
It's also what your body has recognized.
And learned as safe.
So for example,
If you want a new relationship,
That may ask you to stay present.
With intimacy.
The desire for more money may bring new responsibility,
New pressure.
If you desire more peace in your life.
That might feel strange to you if urgency is the state you know best.
You may truly want a new life,
But the parts that come with it will stretch the whole self.
The whole self that has been living inside the life you already know.
So this is about cultivating capacity.
That means the goal isn't to force your new life,
Into that same metaphorical container.
It's to build a bigger container,
Little by little expanding the part of you that can receive what you want and all the things,
Situations and circumstances that come along with it.
And one of the clearest places you can see that capacity getting stretched is in the exact moment you have to take action on the thing you want.
So let's use the example of wanting to do more purpose-driven work or changing careers.
I hear this a lot from people.
So you may want to share your ideas,
Help others in some way,
Perhaps teach what you know,
Or create something you're passionate about.
But the moment that desire gets real,
It will bring exposure.
People can now see what you're creating.
They can respond to what you share.
Money will almost certainly enter into the equation.
Expectations might increase.
This new work may ask you to be more reachable by others,
More visible and more committed than you had to be.
When the desire merely lived only in your head.
That is your capacity to receive being stretched in real time.
You're not only receiving the opportunity to do that more purposeful work,
You're receiving being seen as the person doing it.
And people now having a reaction to you.
That can be a whole lot heavier than actually having to do the work itself.
So when a part of you pulls back or hesitates when it's time to take action,
That hesitation is trying to protect you from the exposure.
The vulnerability.
Or the change that comes along with receiving what you said you wanted.
So the actions we take towards our goals is not so much what we resist,
It's the exposure around the actions that feel threatening.
This is where receiving what we desire,
Actually being able to own and fully integrate what we want into our lives,
Becomes identity work.
Because your resistance is pointing you to the identity that's being asked to step forward in this season of your life.
It's pointing you to a part of yourself that wants to come alive.
A part of you that wants to evolve.
That resistance is actually a guide to a truer and greater version of yourself.
So rather than trying to immediately push through that resistance or avoid it,
I want to give you a simple way to work with it.
Bring to mind a desire that has been calling you for a while,
That you feel excited about,
Yet scared to fully step into.
Ask yourself if this desire arrived,
If it came true.
What would feel hardest?
To receive it.
What part of me might feel exposed,
Stretched?
Or overwhelmed.
Don't rush past that answer.
Stay with it.
Maybe it's being seen in a different way.
Maybe it's the weight of the new responsibility.
Maybe it's stepping into a new role.
Like being a leader.
Maybe it's simply being willing to allow your current routine your current circumstances,
Your current habits to change.
Then ask yourself the identity question.
What identity would I need to start to practice embodying to receive this desire,
Without making myself smaller,
Sabotaging,
Or running away from it?
That's the real practice.
Stepping into the identity,
Your resistance to receiving what you desire,
Is pointing you toward.
Because we put so much attention on what we want,
How do I manifest it?
How do I make it happen?
But acquiring it is only one part of the equation.
The other part is,
Can I stay open?
When it starts to come toward me.
Can I receive what comes with it without immediately falling back into the familiar identity I know?
That our problem is a lack of discipline or a lack of confidence,
But really we're at the threshold of shifting,
Right at our current limit,
At the edge of what feels safe or comfortable to receive.
And that gives you a more powerful question to work with.
Can I stay open when life starts to meet me?
So let the answer to that question be your mantra today.
Yes,
I am capable of receiving what I desire.
I am capable of holding more.
I am safe to be seen as I am.
Thanks for watching today.
I'll talk to you soon.
Much love.
